Post by Goldenlikebrown on May 5, 2019 2:43:55 GMT
Hello, my name is Chris. Im 32. Professional chef. Erm...... ginger. Haha.
However - jokes aside (Just thought id put a catchy opening line there!)
I truly feel like i am at the end of my tether with trying to cope with the way that i am.
Im not writing this thread as some sort of sob story, or in particular need of any predudgmental witty remarks. trust me, i can give them as good as they get, but.... im broken.
Id like to thank you at this point for reading this far, because i am a newcomer onto this forum, and indeed forums themselves.
So, i guess i should start with the fact that -- hmm, where to begin. Ha!
I think differently to most. I think. Or so ive been, and keep being told. I am pretty bright.. i love playing chess. Astronomy is a passion of mine, (i mean, who wouldnt fall in love with understanding that a lightyear was a measurement of distance and not time!!!)
I am emotional, charismatic, enthusiastic, and simply motivated.
But, motivated by what it seems.
I, like to think that i am motivated to what my parents enstilled into me as the logical and correct path in life (2.4kids and a pretty white fence etc) but.. enough is enough.
So, if you have read this far.. i would ask that you dont turn away with this next point, as in my experience it does seem to skew peoples reaction.
I, am an addict.
You see........
(and i will say this, despite my trepidation...)
I, don't believe i am.
I, think that i have been socially categorised into this.
Do not get me wrong, please!
I am not trying to claim to be whiter than white. (No pun intended)
I have dabbled in many things. However over the past five years, alcohol seemed to take somewhat of a hold.
348 days ago, i had had enough.. i signed myself off work on a long time sick to endeavour "treatment" to what i thought was going to be the answer.
One year later.. (almost) i am still (and actually i guess; MORE SO..) experiencing the same sort of mental/psychological defects that i can remember having as a child.
Without boring you much more about specific storys the conclusion to my rambling.. (but not to my thread/question!!) Is that - "addiction" should be discounted as a cause, and seen as a symptom.
So
..
My question is... what sort of means do you think i should look at at this stage in my life? I have gone to the GP, TIME AFTER TIME and have been referred (of course) To the NHS.. but the waiting list is so long that i am now looking into
Private assesment/treatment.
Money is not nessecerilay an issue. However, the best course of action is.
I do not want to have some "online assesment" heres 300quid, im a mug bullshit!!
I want to SEE someone.
Can anyone advise?
And also.... if you liked what typed please contact me.. i would like to hear from someone that knows where im coming from. Goldenlikebrown@gmail.com
Many thanks
Chris
However - jokes aside (Just thought id put a catchy opening line there!)
I truly feel like i am at the end of my tether with trying to cope with the way that i am.
Im not writing this thread as some sort of sob story, or in particular need of any predudgmental witty remarks. trust me, i can give them as good as they get, but.... im broken.
Id like to thank you at this point for reading this far, because i am a newcomer onto this forum, and indeed forums themselves.
So, i guess i should start with the fact that -- hmm, where to begin. Ha!
I think differently to most. I think. Or so ive been, and keep being told. I am pretty bright.. i love playing chess. Astronomy is a passion of mine, (i mean, who wouldnt fall in love with understanding that a lightyear was a measurement of distance and not time!!!)
I am emotional, charismatic, enthusiastic, and simply motivated.
But, motivated by what it seems.
I, like to think that i am motivated to what my parents enstilled into me as the logical and correct path in life (2.4kids and a pretty white fence etc) but.. enough is enough.
So, if you have read this far.. i would ask that you dont turn away with this next point, as in my experience it does seem to skew peoples reaction.
I, am an addict.
You see........
(and i will say this, despite my trepidation...)
I, don't believe i am.
I, think that i have been socially categorised into this.
Do not get me wrong, please!
I am not trying to claim to be whiter than white. (No pun intended)
I have dabbled in many things. However over the past five years, alcohol seemed to take somewhat of a hold.
348 days ago, i had had enough.. i signed myself off work on a long time sick to endeavour "treatment" to what i thought was going to be the answer.
One year later.. (almost) i am still (and actually i guess; MORE SO..) experiencing the same sort of mental/psychological defects that i can remember having as a child.
Without boring you much more about specific storys the conclusion to my rambling.. (but not to my thread/question!!) Is that - "addiction" should be discounted as a cause, and seen as a symptom.
So
..
My question is... what sort of means do you think i should look at at this stage in my life? I have gone to the GP, TIME AFTER TIME and have been referred (of course) To the NHS.. but the waiting list is so long that i am now looking into
Private assesment/treatment.
Money is not nessecerilay an issue. However, the best course of action is.
I do not want to have some "online assesment" heres 300quid, im a mug bullshit!!
I want to SEE someone.
Can anyone advise?
And also.... if you liked what typed please contact me.. i would like to hear from someone that knows where im coming from. Goldenlikebrown@gmail.com
Many thanks
Chris