Deleted
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road rage
Jun 29, 2019 16:06:41 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jun 29, 2019 16:06:41 GMT
Hi fellow ADHDers
Today I lost my shit totally probably the worst I have ever done and with my family in the car π. A driver was driving like a nob and pretty nearly hit us then decided I'm in the wrong honking and shit. So I followed him trying to get him to pull over with my wife and kid in the car crying. I eventually cut in front of him and blocked the road and got out to kill him lol. Lucky for him (and me) an ambulance was behind and they got out to calm things down and another driver came back to tell the other driver he was in the wrong.
This has really fucking upset me I felt that progress was being made on meds and getting the help I needed. Guess there is more work to do π₯Ί.
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road rage
Jun 29, 2019 20:34:32 GMT
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Post by jp on Jun 29, 2019 20:34:32 GMT
Sorry to hear that! Were you on meds at the time? I only ask because although I think I take them everyday I only take them two days in three on average. Having said that I get angry on and off meds, mostly with myself, but also a more general βfuck off worldβ thing. Off meds the anger is a maybe more explosive/ impulsive. And road rage - yes, I can sympathise Anyway... Breeeeeeathe If you can remember ;-) It helps me, when I remember! And try that Buddhist thing of sending out love to the guy who cut you up... Maybe he just got fired or something and is angry too!? Maybe he had ADHD and didnβt mean to cut you up - or even notice that he had because he was lost, distracted and panicking !!!
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Deleted
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road rage
Jun 29, 2019 22:59:51 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jun 29, 2019 22:59:51 GMT
Thanks for your reply. I was on my way home to take my second dose for the day. The rage came over so quick I was unable to calm that shit down. Forgot the rest I was gonna say π’
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vikki27
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Post by vikki27 on Jun 30, 2019 21:31:31 GMT
I'm really sorry that happened to you. The explosive rage thing is one I definitely relate to. It got so bad when Husband and I were first together that he refused to get in the car with me again!!!
Ultimately, I know how hard it is to control the anger when the red mist descends, but in case it helps you at all, I'll tell you what helps me.
When I drive, I sort of meditate on all the times I've driven like a bloody lunatic for totally (in my opinion) justifiable reasons; the time my Grandfer was rushed to hospital and was dying; the time my eldest cat was on the brink of death and I made a 20 minutes journey in less than 12 minutes. Then, when someone drives like a total twonk, I imagine that they're making a similar mercy dash. I try to imagine a justifiable reason for them driving link a twonk, the same way I have previously driven like a twonk myself.
This was NOT an overnight fix, but with regular practise, it almost totally stopped my road rage. I still have moments where I get really angry, but now I don't give in to the urge to flip them off or swear at them out the window, or drive up their exhaust until they LEARN THE ERROR OF THEIR WAYS!!!!! It helps calm me down a lot, as does recalling my husband's face when he told me he wouldn't get in a car with me again until I got my road rage under control, lol!
Anyway, I don't know how possible it might be for you to put that into practise but I thought I'd mention it, just in case.
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Deleted
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road rage
Jul 1, 2019 10:18:12 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 1, 2019 10:18:12 GMT
I'm normally ok it's just he found my trigger. I get mega fucking angry at anyone who blames me for there mistakes I cannot control it the anger is instant I would have been ok if he didn't go past after and cut me up π’ I'm guessing the nob though he was in a race.
I might just stick to driving my van it's slower π€£.
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Post by swagnusswagnusson on Jul 3, 2019 9:48:36 GMT
I stopped driving a coupole of years ago
I just drive like a twat, and have lots of little bumps, a few write offs, the last write off i lost control on a muddy B road after taking a bend too fast and went head on into an ambulasnce. No shit.
Wasnt too badly hurt, few cuts in my face and bruised, but was good to step straight out of the written off renault Laguna in the ditch and strasight into an ambulance. Fortunately the ambulance wasnt taking passeneger anywhere or on the way to an emergency, Id have felt bad..
I dont feeel safe driving , partly cos of always driving like a twat, which I do because I'm always last minute or late wherever i'm going, and just out of habit....and the other thing that happens more and more is just being at the wheel and reAlising i have NO recollection, ZERO recollection of the previous 1/2/5/10 miles...
I was taken off driving duties at Royal mail after having n3 'blameworthy' accidents, not accidents, i cant remember what royal mail call them but they don't call them accidents as it sounds like it couldn t be avoided , I dummo now, but i had 3 blamewolrthies in 12 mmontyhs and got takenn off driviong.
Which wa s a shame its great fun i live in rural Devon and some of the farms are down dirt tracks miles apart, driving sideways through the unmetalled roads, and unmarked tracks, unadopted lanes, never getting out of second gear,permanent redline, and getting paid to do that ll morning in beautiful scenery is about as good as life gets.
**********IF YOU ARE EVER THINKING OF BUYING A A VAN AT AUCTION, BRITISH GAS SERVICE THEIR VANS AND MONITOR THEIR DRIVERS DRIVING HABITS. EVEN IF YOU DONT LIKE THAT RANK TURQUOISEY BLUE COLOUR THEY ARE, DON'T BE TEMPTED BY ANYTHING THATS POST OFFICE RED, NEVER*********
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Deleted
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road rage
Jul 3, 2019 10:03:56 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 3, 2019 10:03:56 GMT
I stopped driving a coupole of years ago I just drive like a twat, and have lots of little bumps, a few write offs, the last write off i lost control on a muddy B road after taking a bend too fast and went head on into an ambulasnce. No shit. Wasnt too badly hurt, few cuts in my face and bruised, but was good to step straight out of the written off renault Laguna in the ditch and strasight into an ambulance. Fortunately the ambulance wasnt taking passeneger anywhere or on the way to an emergency, Id have felt bad.. I dont feeel safe driving , partly cos of always driving like a twat, which I do because I'm always last minute or late wherever i'm going, and just out of habit....and the other thing that happens more and more is just being at the wheel and reAlising i have NO recollection, ZERO recollection of the previous 1/2/5/10 miles... I was taken off driving duties at Royal mail after having n3 'blameworthy' accidents, not accidents, i cant remember what royal mail call them but they don't call them accidents as it sounds like it couldn t be avoided , I dummo now, but i had 3 blamewolrthies in 12 mmontyhs and got takenn off driviong. Which wa s a shame its great fun i live in rural Devon and some of the farms are down dirt tracks miles apart, driving sideways through the unmetalled roads, and unmarked tracks, unadopted lanes, never getting out of second gear,permanent redline, and getting paid to do that ll morning in beautiful scenery is about as good as life gets. **********IF YOU ARE EVER THINKING OF BUYING A A VAN AT AUCTION, BRITISH GAS SERVICE THEIR VANS AND MONITOR THEIR DRIVERS DRIVING HABITS. EVEN IF YOU DONT LIKE THAT RANK TURQUOISEY BLUE COLOUR THEY ARE, DON'T BE TEMPTED BY ANYTHING THATS POST OFFICE RED, NEVER********* π€£ Yeah I'll stay away from red. I'm going to let my wife do a bit more of are driving I think untill I hold my rage. I don't have many accidents but I do get the not recalling the journey and I miss so many turnings. Do you think you will drive again?
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Post by swagnusswagnusson on Jul 3, 2019 10:14:06 GMT
i dont know, if this is partly down to adhd making me drive like this, and i havent even been diagnosed yet, and if the meds make me drive more sensibly, or attentively, I will..
Not driving is a pain round here, public transport is very infrequent and expensive......i would likke to drive again, but, and i mentioned this a while asgo, all the shit , like the above driving examples only really started happening since i gave up 24/7 weed smoking, weed really kept the distracting thoughts and mind chatter at bay,, and i hadnt really been using coke or speed since our son was born in 2006, well, started cutting down on them then, and noticed a decline in everything requiring concentration, care, attention, systematic approach.....now i get in a car and im stone cold sober but far more unsafe than i ever was.
its probably something the police would pull you for , dsriving round on speed , stoned.
But driving round on prescribed dexedrine is fine.
anyhow I've already had to phone doctors as i was gonna be late for my 10.30 appt to have some stitches out and she rescheduled it for 11.30 and if i dont get moving now its another balls up,
@jessop just thought i dont really get the rage that much. Actually i do,, i shout and call people names, i dont count it as rage because its never ended up in a fight, or chasing the other car relentlessly till you catch them Morte exasperation/frustration than rage, like if i can see on a single track road the oncoming car has a passing place 20 yds behind them, and I have one 200yds behind me, if they appear in any way to dither or to reverse slowly into their space , for even a split second, I'll just shout something about Bellends or and i wont say as not sure what this sites swearing policy is like, and redline it in reverse, angine screaming to the space 200yds behind me. Saving no time really, but it lets them know how crap i think they are. And i bully people on motorways, middle lane drivers, overtaking lane 70mph drivers, these people are annoying and wrong, thinking about it i am a bit road ragey, and if I'm not road ragey im only semi aware of my surroundings cos I'm almost daydreaming, its not daydreaming or fallling asleep its just tuning out completely. I'm glad I have stopped, its made life difficult me and wife used to share car, we live in village, im having to move to a neaarby town rather than get another car. Id either end up badly injuring someone , maybe me, maybe my son, maybe an incompetent-reverser, which wouldnt necessarily be a bad thingi guess Cars cost me a fortune too i always park them, forget where and get tickets which snowball as I never sort them, ive got 3 im being chased for now from Nov 2017, think they were 35 quid each all of them are over 200 quid now. And even though i dliberately buy shit cars, they are never worth MOTing when that comes up due to disrepair and outward appearance and internal upkeep they are prettyy much always unsellableI justify it by saying it worked out cheaper than having a hire car, but than add in alll thew unpaid tickets, fines for untaxed,
so i changed my mind now, no, even with meds Im not gonna suddenly becopme safe, smoooth , considerate, responsible road user,and turtle waxing the car , so I really need to learn from the past and take a parental role with myself and ban myself from having a car as long as i live under my roof, my rules, no.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 3, 2019 12:58:30 GMT
I only get rage when I get the blame for others wrong doing I think this another disorder. I swear alot like you I feel that is sort of normal when you are surrounded by dickheads. But the dangerous driving bit fuck knows where that comes from i drive pretty well now I have slow car and van it's just the others π π π π π I was a bit of a racer loved karting and done a couple of track days but I found it more fun racing on the roads. I had a ford focus st that was running over 310 bhp fucking loved that car. I did crash it at fairly slow speed into the back of a solicitor of all people because I was looking at bums π (don't tell the wife) love bums. Then my daughter came along so I sold it I couldn't control myself,if it can go fast I'll make it go fast.
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road rage
Jul 3, 2019 15:31:54 GMT
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Post by speedy1 on Jul 3, 2019 15:31:54 GMT
I totally get it @jessop I don't usually get road rage I generally just think not everyone is good at driving we all have things we're crap at
However... When someone else is clearly in the wrong but is beeping at u like u r at fault..
That really gets my goat! When someone's accidentally cut u up but then realises & apologies that's totally fine
But some arrogant twat arrrgh u just need 2 have a word with them & explain the situation so they realise they're at fault
I stopped the works van in the middle of a busy road coz some idiot who was in the right turn lane decided he was gonna cut into my lane which went into 2 lanes as I was heading 2 the overtaking side of my lane
He had 2 slow down & cut in behind me & had the cheek 2 beep at me!
So I stopped 2 have a word, he also stopped much further back
It was a very busy road so rather than get out I gestured the what the fuck r u beeping at me for kinda sign
Anyway I carried on driving & the beeping car kept its distance
I pulled up at the nxt traffic lights & the beeping car went into the right lane 2 turn right but didn't pull up along side me
There wasn't a car behind me at that point so I reversed back & got his passenger 2 wind down the window so I could have a word
They both looked terrified fuck knows why I'm a 7 stone average height lass
I asked him why he beeped he said I'd cut him up I explained no u crossed the white line & cut into my lane
I did not cross any white line & that if he genuinely didn't realise he was in the wrong he needs to brush up on his highway code
He didn't say anything further which is a good job for both our sakes coz even though I was talking calmly
I was deciding which part of his car 2 smash the fuck up first!!
I see crap driving every day & it doesn't bother me
It's just when they think they're in the right that I get pissed off!
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Post by swagnusswagnusson on Jul 3, 2019 15:51:14 GMT
"They both looked terrified fuck knows why" " "I was deciding which part of his car 2 smash the fuck up first!!" fuck knows why My only nice car i also got rid of when my son came along, it was no 310 bhp car but it was a really well tuned classic Mini 30, rebuilt MG Metro engine , twin carbs, and it ran so sweet and sounded like a fighter plane. Could just about get to 110mph, which yeah in a Mini, all lowered so your arse is only inches off the tarmac gets a bit scary. Even with phat tyres the famous Mini wet road understeer kept me on me toes, and on my roof, but only once. Loved that car , only car I've owned that ive ever actually liked. What pisses me off most is people who cant seem to see ahead and be aware of whats about to happen. Admittedly i have a lot of bumps, but that was cos i was going too fast, I was well aware of the hazards but just unable to avoid them....i reckon that would hold up in court okay
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Post by speedy1 on Jul 3, 2019 15:58:06 GMT
Swag that is hilarious u crashed into an ambulance!
& yep totally agree don't touch a post van there isn't 1 at our depot that is its original shape!
God knows how they pass there mots!
When I did the Royal mail driving test we had 2 do a van check first
When checking that there was no sharp bits on the van the examiner cut his finger
We still went out in it! It was better than the other van available!
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Post by speedy1 on Jul 3, 2019 16:08:01 GMT
Hahaha yep point taken guess I was looking like a crazy bitch!
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Post by swagnusswagnusson on Jul 3, 2019 16:11:33 GMT
the ambulance i know right, my son still takes the piss, 'Dad , its massive and luminous and has flashing lights, how...?'
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Post by swagnusswagnusson on Jul 3, 2019 16:12:55 GMT
This is a great forum, I'll be gutted if I dont get diagnosed with ADHD as i'll feel like an imposter here
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road rage
Jul 3, 2019 16:31:28 GMT
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Post by speedy1 on Jul 3, 2019 16:31:28 GMT
Pretty sure u'll get diagnosed just tell them how u crashed into a huge luminous ambulance!! Lol
U've made me late now & I haven't done what I was supposed 2 be doing (writing a letter of complaint 2 my insurance company that has kindly blacklisted me & is not paying me out for my stolen bike!)
I'm not getting into that now or I'll miss my entire tennis match!
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Post by swagnusswagnusson on Jul 5, 2019 0:39:52 GMT
I've just realised, @jessop , is that a reference to yellow bentines....jessop jessop jessop?
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monologged
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Post by monologged on Jul 5, 2019 0:45:59 GMT
I've just realised, @jessop , is that a reference to yellow bentines....jessop jessop jessop? I almost called myself ShatersBassoon again
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 5, 2019 5:11:30 GMT
I've just realised, @jessop , is that a reference to yellow bentines....jessop jessop jessop? No it's my name lol
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Deleted
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road rage
Aug 5, 2019 23:36:50 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Aug 5, 2019 23:36:50 GMT
We have a chunk of motorway (M4) around here that's only two lanes. Almost without exception, once you hit this section, someone will be hogging the outside lane, keeping pace with a lorry or other slow moving vehicle in the left lane! The A470 is even worse. I wish I could say people are just oblivious but I think some of them deliberately do it! There's nothing more liberating than a bit of power under the right foot
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