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Post by Tim on Mar 5, 2012 2:44:40 GMT
I came to this forum last year, feeling a bit lost and wanting some answers:
1. Were my problems due to ADHD 2. As I had a childhood diagnosis, how hard would it be to get treatment as an adult.
In this thread, I am going to post a summary of my case, my views on my case, and my experience using Ritalin.
Hopefully, this will be helpful to someone, and certainly it will help me think about the past year.
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Post by Tim on Mar 5, 2012 2:48:27 GMT
Point 33 onwards of most interest to someone interested in treatment as an adult.
CASE SUMMARY
1. Early childhood history, diagnosed with hyper-mobility and dyspraxia at 4. 2. I saw medical people for my coordination problems regularly to 14. Medical notes say that I appeared 'sad', had trouble following instructions. They hint that there may be other problems e.g. autism, but that my mother didn't want to pursue diagnosis. 3. At 14, it was decided to stop working with me on coordination problems because it was too 'stressful'
4. Serious suicide attempt at 15, due to being socially isolated and having low self esteem. 5. Referred to child mental health, therapist prescribed Ritalin because I was not focusing well enough for successful therapy 6. Improved school function, so assumed ADHD diagnosis. High grades, but still socially isolated. Not depressed though. 7. Ceased Ritalin at 16 due to 'Parents stated that they did not like the effect on child'
8. 16-18 attend college for A levels. Sudden massive improvement in social function - I had real friends for the first time. 9. Much reduced academic performance, supplemented by private tutors. Good enough grades for university.
10. Get decent job. Find it very boring and do it poorly. Get depressed again. 11. Quit job, find another. Get bored, do it poorly. Less depressed.
12. Attend university, studying computing, which I was very passionate about. 13. Very good grades in classes that I was interested in, very poor grades otherwise. Averaging out as acceptable. 14. Significant problems with prioritisation, getting course work done on time. 15. Eventful. Dramatic relationships, lots of alcohol, some drugs. Kept on track by really loving my subject. 16. Very little depression during this period. 17. Graduate successfully
18. Get job in desired field, move to new city to do it. 19. Job demands attention to detail, consistency, moderate behavior in meetings, long attention span 20. Get bored, do it badly, but take work home due to high commitment, and retain job. Regarded as an okay worker. 21. My co-workers think I am strange. Socially excluded. Find it hard to make friends in new town. 22. Major car accident due to recklessness (not driver but knew driver would be reckless). 23. Major depression, lasting for a year. Really scared I will die this time. 24. Quit job, move home with parents.
25. Recover, get new job 26. More tolerant company (small company full of odd people, rather than suit wearing blue chip) 27. Lodge with an old couple, rather than alone. 28. Leave job to pursue masters degree 29. On leaving both job and host couple, they both tell me they think I am very strange. Not in a hostile way, but it upset me. 'You are the strangest person i have ever met. Don't change', 'It'll be sad without you here to keep us entertained. I was having fun not being the weirdest guy in the office'
30. Start masters degree 31. Pass classes I enjoy, fail classes I do not enjoy 32. Problems with prioritizing, procrastination, moderating behavior
33. Having failed christmas exams, recognize something is wrong. Three theories - 1. repeat depression, 2. It's too hard, stop pushing self, 3. Problems so far (10-33) could be caused by ADHD 34. Tell GP I would like to be referred for treatment for ADHD. Mention childhood diagnosis. Prescreening questionnaire. 35. Referral to consultant psychiatrist 36. Very intense relationship ends in serious attempted suicide by girlfriend (still shocked at extent of self harm) 37. On second visit, psychiatrist announces intention to prescribe. Narcotics screening. 38. Change to another psychiatrist, still no prescription 39. Fail another set of exams, primarily due to anxiety and procrastination 40. GP and psychiatrist argue over shared care arrangement 41. GP prescribes ritalin, but refuses to prescribe standard adult dose (advises 10mg a day)
42. Keep taking ritalin 'as required' (15mg weekdays, none on weekend) for 8 months. 43. Continuing problems with depression / anxiety 44. Psychiatrist decides to treat as anxiety, stop Ritalin, move to Citalopram.
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Post by Tim on Mar 5, 2012 4:45:42 GMT
Using Ritalin (MPH)
Different people have very different experiences with MPH.
I found: 1. Almost no side effects at low dose 2. Solved problem with distraction 3. Increased problem with prioritization. 4. Helped with social stuff
Today is a bit of an experiment. After a long break, I decided to take the last of my Ritalin and write these posts. I guess i wanted to remind myself. Hence the huge posts.
I started at a low dose, and stayed at the minimum level where I saw a useful effect. MPH is a powerful drug, and I was scared of becoming tolerant to it.
Concentration
I found with MPH that I would start a task and see it through, or at least work on it consistently for a few hours.
It was really luck as to whether that days task was useful or not.
I might decide to rewrite a report that was already good enough, and the result would be a huge improvement. But I would never get the time back, and it was good enough to start with.
Not being weird
However, I did a lot better in social situations. In meetings, I had been prone to getting excited, and either embarrassing myself or talking too much. In lectures, I asked too many questions, to an extent that irritated some of the staff.
On MPH, I was far better at holding my tongue.
When I wanted to ask a question, I wrote it down to look up later. In meetings, I stuck to the agenda, and only talked when i really had something to add.
I realized that I had been talking to keep myself focused - I was asking questions because the alternative was to not listen at all.
I think my friends appreciated it too.
So, MPH, not a magic pill. It definitely helps with impulse control, but you get caught up in what you are doing and may not realize that it's not useful.
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Post by Tim on Mar 5, 2012 5:30:27 GMT
Do I have ADHD?
Seeking treatment
The way mental health treatment works in the UK at the moment creates a bit of a problem. Where you have a long term problem, like a learning disability or depression, but are more or less coping with it, you have to seek treatment.
More or less coping isn't nice. Your life might be chaotic. You might keep messing up and wonder why. You might start to hate yourself for messing up again and again.
So long as you don't get arrested, the mental health system doesn't come and find you.
But trying to self diagnose with a mental problem is impossible, and not good for you. The way we think is full of subtle mistakes and mental illusions. We create complicated explanations for how we feel, and fit what we see around those explanations.
You could look at the overly long history I wrote, and explain everything from ADHD: 'Didn't fit in at school due to ADHD, got depressed, created a pattern that followed for years' Or you could explain it from depression: 'Not concentrating is a classic sign of depression. Maybe he was isolated because i got depressed and withdrew'. Or you could say there was no problem: 'Well, he seems unhappy a lot, but he got through school and got a job, what is the problem exactly?'
I came to this site because I was unhappy with my life. Lots of things had gone wrong, and it was my fault. Perhaps I was seeking something to blame. ADHD is a part of who you are, but it is something you didn't make. Maybe I was looking for something to blame my actions on. Or maybe I was looking because there was something there.
If you have a childhood ADHD diagnosis, and are having ADHD like problems, as far as the system is concerned, that's the issue. With a bit of luck, you will quickly have an active diagnosis and an MPH prescription. If you weren't diagnosed at school, the NHS are not interested.
There just seems to be something wrong with asking people to self diagnose mental problems and treating them based on that. Just like you can't see your blindspot, it's really hard to see the faults in your thoughts. And how do you know they are abnormal?
Unfortunately, if you are having problems and feel you need help, you have to ask for it. I felt really uncomfortable doing this. My GP seemed very disproving, and the NHS psychiatrists was happy to write the prescriptions, but seemed hostile too. The answer, as far as he was concerned, was that if someone said a drug worked for them, they had whatever it was supposed to treat.
So I still wondered - did I have ADHD, or did I just want to think so? I still wonder. Good luck.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 14, 2012 21:03:38 GMT
Hi Tim and Readers,
I've just been diagnosed with ADHD after many years of simply thinking I was a very strange person. I also was called strange as a teenager and it hurt me a great deal. I won't tell you my full story on this message (as I'm really tired after an intense searching session on the web), but I will tell you what I believe to be a cure for ADHD.
Primal Reflex Problems cause ADHD and other disabilities and there are very straight forward exercises you can do to remedy them. I think both my children have problems too and so I'm going to train as a practitioner this year. I will keep you updated of the outcomes.
Hope this is helpful Tim.
Regards,
SongBird
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Post by Deleted on Mar 15, 2012 18:21:29 GMT
This sounds like Dole therapy for dyslexia?
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Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2012 17:23:29 GMT
Ill give any thing ago once. Within reason that is.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2012 20:12:46 GMT
Hi, I'm not sure of dole therapy but there may be some similarity. However these exercises are to develop neurological pathways which have not developed for some reason therefore causing dyspraxia, ADHA, dyslexia etc. (these are the labels which have been used so far). A relative of mine has undertaken the therapy and has improved greatly but I will keep an open mind and tell you more when in 3 months or so. In the meantime, stay positive as I have managed my ADHA (without knowing I had it) with hypnosis, positive thinking, time management techniques and have achieved many things against the odds. These all manage the symptoms but with this new approach I'm looking at cure - will keep you posted.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2012 20:41:55 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2012 22:15:09 GMT
Dore have a bit of a 'reputation'. I've just read their ADHD page (again) and come away unimpressed.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 17, 2012 5:24:55 GMT
That was pretty much my take, too. Sceptical about anything that claims it can cure my brain chemistry.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 17, 2012 10:09:26 GMT
Hi, I'm not sure of dole therapy but there may be some similarity. However these exercises are to develop neurological pathways which have not developed for some reason therefore causing dyspraxia, ADHA, dyslexia etc. (these are the labels which have been used so far). A relative of mine has undertaken the therapy and has improved greatly but I will keep an open mind and tell you more when in 3 months or so. In the meantime, stay positive as I have managed my ADHA (without knowing I had it) with hypnosis, positive thinking, time management techniques and have achieved many things against the odds. These all manage the symptoms but with this new approach I'm looking at cure - will keep you posted. Cure is a big word. Nobody is cured - but you could have a reduction in symptoms...which is what we really want. Training your mind and getting into exercise/diet routines could have an important impact on your life so it's not complete tosh - but it's not going to change your chemistry. Establishing neural pathways is important for the young - left to their own devices a child could make themselves a burden for life. So my take is..........possibly worthwhile but some organisations have rigid systems and a vested interest.
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