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Post by blaze on May 12, 2015 13:19:12 GMT
Tell me four is the worst craziest hardest age and that it will all fall into place soon!?!? Pls pls pls tell me this will get easier....
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ladybug
Member's posted somewhat
Posts: 75
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Post by ladybug on May 12, 2015 13:46:58 GMT
Oh dear - having a tough time with your 4 year old??
My eldest was pretty tough at this age, so stroppy and angry and refused to do anything i asked her. I am almost definitely sure she has ADHD but she's not been diagnosed yet.
Hang in there, hope it gets easier soon xxxx
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Post by contrarymary on May 12, 2015 19:33:34 GMT
i do actually think that 4 was one of the hardest ages, somehow worse than the "terrible twos" yet still less soul-destroying than mid-late teenage anger/angst/rejection stuff can be... that's with a girl - who is now a truly lovely (inattentive, spacy) young adult
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Post by blaze on May 12, 2015 20:55:39 GMT
Four yr olds-two of them, they have me tag teamed... We are almost certain they have my ADHD, but of course diagnosis is way down the line. I suspect other developmental disorders also. It feels like we have hit a developmental growth spurt- like the ones when they are babies- only we are not coming our of it..... There's a lot of pressure for them to be ready for school, but they are totally resistant to potty training, really struggling to go to sleep at night so over tired, and one currently refuses to walk anywhere. They v obviously don't want to grow up (total opposite of babyhood where they zoomed ahead of peers) and do baby cries, ask to nurse (which was done two yrs ago now), want carried etc. I can't imagine how they CD be ready for school, they are so far behind their nursery class in most ways, despite literacy/numerical skills fairly advanced (they taught themselves, we don't push this stuff). Their speach is v unusual, despite huge vocab, so communication is banish and melt downs full on and frequent...... Oh dear - having a tough time with your 4 year old?? My eldest was pretty tough at this age, so stroppy and angry and refused to do anything i asked her. I am almost definitely sure she has ADHD but she's not been diagnosed yet. Hang in there, hope it gets easier soon xxxx
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Post by blaze on May 12, 2015 21:00:30 GMT
i do actually think that 4 was one of the hardest ages, somehow worse than the "terrible twos" yet still less soul-destroying than mid-late teenage anger/angst/rejection stuff can be... that's with a girl - who is now a truly lovely (inattentive, spacy) young adult My first was born a teenager, her sis is catching up now. I'm still 13 really so looking forward to teen yrs, I loved working with teenagers, the more difficult the more I bonded : ) A friend refers to the stages as terrible twos, threenagers, and fking fours.... Itsjjust so constantly impossible at mo. So violent, so reactive, so upset, there is no right balance to be found between activity's and free time and calm cuddles and crazy giggles, everything tried is wrong....... And they are so so tall its physically v painful to deal with the fights or meltdowns. Like two 8yrolds with toddler emotions
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Post by contrarymary on May 12, 2015 21:23:58 GMT
wow that sounds really challenging. i guess you go for consistency, and hope that things move forwards...
mine always seemed to go backwards when unwell, or when there was a big change and she was feeling unsettled - it was as tho you could halve her age and she would be right on track for those milestones! gradually you could see spaces between the behaviours, and then the spaces got bigger, and then that lovely tipping point when a new normal was found, and the acting up became the smaller patch....
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Post by blaze on May 14, 2015 10:09:25 GMT
Yep def challenging
I'm guessing that if it was still the old system by the time there were diagnosed I'd be getting DLA&careers allowance for both- not that we need it so I'm not worried about that- but I think it makes it obvious that its much tougher raising kids with these needs, a form of validation I guess or recognition. I'm guessing we won't ever claim anything or be entitled to it the way things are changing, not that I'm bothered from fincaial perspectives he, but its so much harder to keep in mind that they are teb times tough than an non disabled kid without that- if that makes sense. I sinpley CD never put them in before &after school clubs for example so working fulltime will never be an option for me. And I'm taking a wkend job just to get a break from them!
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Post by blaze on May 20, 2015 12:17:28 GMT
Unbearable night
It is physically impossible to manage two kids having melt downs like two yrolds but the size of eight yrolds. Bloody nose, bust lip and lots of bruises and scratches on me this morning
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