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Post by tati on Jul 2, 2015 18:44:41 GMT
Still at 58 mg, no huge mood swings any more, and I'm starting to do more stuff... I've also got my room a bit less messy So, things are slightly improving, and no side effects at the moment.
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Post by tati on Jul 15, 2015 16:38:21 GMT
Mood swing down, today. It's been a while since I felt this way. Sad and angry, tired, without energy. Last week I was quite ok, considering the fact that a terrible heat wave was making me (and everyone else) sleepless and sluggish. I still managed to do some stuff and the mood was stable. Today, I don't know. It's a strange and very unpleasant sensation, when sadness and anger get mixed together. And the future looks so dark. I have no energy or inspiration inside, at the moment. I don't even know what I want to do with my life, but for sure I feel I'm not doing enough, I'm not solving my problems, and time is passing. I don't have a job, the savings will finish soon and I will end up depending on my family again. I felt so proud to have managed to provide to myself, found a shared apartment, been there for years. Now I risk loosing everything and I'm not doing enough to avoid it, I'm not even looking for a job. I've been doing whatever job I found since I was out of higschool at 19, I worked while at the University, and after 20 years of efforts and the illusion of having found the right job for me, it's like I have done nothing and I don't even have the will to find a new one. Every time I start again, make all the efforts, learn new things, make human bonds, make a very good work that brings praises and compliments (at least in some cases), and then "pof!" everything is over. The effort looks awful and scary this time. I don't have the energy, the hope, the ability to dream and adapt, the naivety that I had years ago... I feel drained.
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Post by tati on Oct 23, 2015 10:50:13 GMT
Good news. Strattera is working for me. Non as much as I would like, but it's better than nothing and I have no side effects. Strattera is now 60 mg. The other two medications, Sertraline and Lamotrigine are unchanged. It works slightly, slowly... but it works. I do my stuff, and I feel more centered. I don't know how to explain, I feel more "solid" and calm. I feel strong. Also the mood is much more stable now. What has not improved is the tendency to disorder. It's still there. And I'm still forgetful, especially under pressure. I'm also still prone to become overwhelmed by emotions, but only if the situation is actually really unpleasant (for example, undeserved rudeness from stressed bus drivers ). But at the moment, it's ok for me. It's a step forward. A huge step, if I look back. For the future, we will see.
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Post by hermanli on Nov 8, 2015 13:59:09 GMT
How do you feel the Lamictal has acted on you?
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Post by tati on Nov 9, 2015 12:47:33 GMT
Actually I can't tell what is the exact effect of each single med, because I started taking Lamictal and Strattera together. But Lamictal apart from being anticonvulsant, is used as a mood stabilizer so I think it is the one that has acted on my mood and emotions, making them a lot more stable and under my control.
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Post by tati on Jan 2, 2016 23:50:03 GMT
Extra stress due to unexpected events is neutralizing the meds effects. I feel tired, bad, useless, and I also restarted smoking. What the hell. No.
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Post by tati on Jan 3, 2016 18:05:34 GMT
I feel better, but I'm stuck in finding distractions and random stuff in the internet. Useless stuff, mainly. While I should be making my website. It's like some kind of anaesthetic to me. A distraction. I've started to do some meditation again, I hope it will help to release tension.
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Post by tati on Mar 2, 2016 16:58:46 GMT
I will probably stop Strattera it's not helping me enough, maybe the improvements weren't even due to it, but rather to Lamictal. The psychiatrist is seeing me again at the end of the month, and if nothing changes (and I doubt) he will put me on Methilphenidate. I wanted to avoid it but I really need help. At this point, I would take anything.
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