Post by posthaze on Jan 22, 2017 19:58:41 GMT
Hey guys,
So, I've struggled with my life up until now. I've had so many problems, so many pitfalls in my education, my dating life, my social life and even my work life that now that I've managed to get back to uni to study as a mature student, it was so pressing that I felt I needed help. I reached out to the uni wellbeing services and they offered to give me a dyslexia screening test based on the fact that I mentioned I had trouble reading for prolonged periods of time (I'm doing a History degree LOL).
My spelling and grammar and all that jazz was in the top 10% for my age group, but my memory was abysmal. This just substantiated the fears I've always had about my memory. I can't remember people's names unless I repeat them over and over and over, I can't remember what I was reading/ doing 30 seconds ago. My long term memory is excellent, and when the topic I'm discussing clusters around an area that I'm interested in, I'm a beacon of (usually useless) knowledge. Well, after doing the test, it got me thinking about the issues I've faced in my life and I started looking up the problems I have had as a child at school and the sort of problems I'm having now at university. After doing waaaay more research than was probably necessary, I decided that adhd really seemed like the problem! To boot, my little sister seems to display every symptom, even if I don't.
However, now I know so much about the subject, I can't help but feel that I've wipped myself into some kind of hysteria where I am 'acting up' to the condition. I am more conscious than ever of my behaviours and I can't, for example, say that I am encouraging the tapping of my foot because of what I know, or that I always had that problem? I begin to doubt myself very heavily and feel like I'm being weak minded or feeble about my own life. Why did it take me until the age of 24 to get to this stage?
Can anyone relate? Am I acting up? Or is this real? I feel like I can't tell one from the other anymore.
So, I've struggled with my life up until now. I've had so many problems, so many pitfalls in my education, my dating life, my social life and even my work life that now that I've managed to get back to uni to study as a mature student, it was so pressing that I felt I needed help. I reached out to the uni wellbeing services and they offered to give me a dyslexia screening test based on the fact that I mentioned I had trouble reading for prolonged periods of time (I'm doing a History degree LOL).
My spelling and grammar and all that jazz was in the top 10% for my age group, but my memory was abysmal. This just substantiated the fears I've always had about my memory. I can't remember people's names unless I repeat them over and over and over, I can't remember what I was reading/ doing 30 seconds ago. My long term memory is excellent, and when the topic I'm discussing clusters around an area that I'm interested in, I'm a beacon of (usually useless) knowledge. Well, after doing the test, it got me thinking about the issues I've faced in my life and I started looking up the problems I have had as a child at school and the sort of problems I'm having now at university. After doing waaaay more research than was probably necessary, I decided that adhd really seemed like the problem! To boot, my little sister seems to display every symptom, even if I don't.
However, now I know so much about the subject, I can't help but feel that I've wipped myself into some kind of hysteria where I am 'acting up' to the condition. I am more conscious than ever of my behaviours and I can't, for example, say that I am encouraging the tapping of my foot because of what I know, or that I always had that problem? I begin to doubt myself very heavily and feel like I'm being weak minded or feeble about my own life. Why did it take me until the age of 24 to get to this stage?
Can anyone relate? Am I acting up? Or is this real? I feel like I can't tell one from the other anymore.