2leftfeet
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Post by 2leftfeet on May 20, 2019 21:38:10 GMT
Hi all, I'm 61 never diagnosed, but i was trying to learn to dance but couldn't so looked thru dyspraxia etc. Unfortunately I must have hit on ADHD. I say unfortunately as it's a stigmatising and controversial diagnosis as I found when my sister 4 years younger battled thru the system for diagnosis (when I said she may have it too).
That was a few years back and less than 6 months ago I added OCPD ( obsessive compulsive personality disorder) to the self diagnosed list. Once again I wasn't looking for this. Somebody at work was driving me crazy, so I read a book "How to cope with people who drive you crazy." & I found myself as a "crazymaker" rather than them! Ho-hum
If you have unusual traits an can find them clustered all together its likely that's you. the more obscure weird things are the more likely.
Some bits are like those mentalist shows on TV. The usual under achiever, forgetfulness, ooh look a squirrel, Hyperfocus so intense I can make the room disappear when watching TV, all the way to job choice (working in A&E)
Any way, I don't do that job now. Hello to you all. Anyone else got adhd & ocpd ?
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Post by helenahandcart on May 23, 2019 8:47:06 GMT
Hello people.
I'm in the process of being diagnosed, but at this point it appears to be a foregone conclusion. Now that I've started to tell some friends and family, it also appears that I am the only person surprised by this. I'm 40 and very shocked.
I'm extremely lucky that I currently have private medical insurance, so this diagnostic process is moving swiftly, although it only covers diagnosis, so not sure what'll happen after that. The initial reason I was referred to a psychiatrist though was not ADHD, but hypervigilance and PTSD.
I've always known that I have always been relatively speaking quite hyper, but hadn't really put much thought into it. Reading about ADHD though really devastated me; all those things that I had thought were character defects, well they weren't. I've never understood why I've found so many things such a struggle, as am pretty smart. I'm also a little weirded out as how do I know what is me and what is ADHD? My sense of self is a little wobbly, but overall I feel some relief at finally understanding why some things are the way that they are.
I'm also not sure how to deal with (some) people's reactions. If anyone has any suggestions when dealing with responses such as, "everyone's a bit ADHD" and other minimising responses, I'd really appreciate it. It's driving me potty.
Anyway, hello.
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2leftfeet
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Post by 2leftfeet on May 24, 2019 17:06:19 GMT
Hi helenahandcart, I think people who say they have a bit of ADHD are often trying to show a bit of understanding.... but also... may not believe in ADHD
not be very empathetic
not know what you're on about
Luckily if they're not shocked at the diagnosis they are not trying to deny or sometimes I feel "gaslight" a person. One therapist I saw said in exasperation to me ( when I saw no point in doing transactional analysis) "that's all very entertaining but" and I said that although I present things in s light manner my life is anything but entertaining. Some people wil listen but few truly understand. There's a lot of phrases I'm a bit OCD I've got a bit of social anxiety... etc To quote Dr Zeus
Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
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Post by wood worker on Jun 18, 2019 21:57:48 GMT
Hello everyone and good to meet you all.
This is actually my return to the group as I was a member here over 10 years. Things have a changed a lot since I first got diagnosed and I have actually had 10 relatively happy years. I am delighted to say that over the last 10 years my life has turned out far better then I believed it ever could of, But.....just recently things have started to take a bit of turn and i think now would be a good time to come back, share some of my experiences and hopefully learn something new.
Thanks and i look forward to chatting with you all.
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Post by jp on Jun 30, 2019 22:39:53 GMT
Hello everyone and good to meet you all. This is actually my return to the group as I was a member here over 10 years. Things have a changed a lot since I first got diagnosed and I have actually had 10 relatively happy years. I am delighted to say that over the last 10 years my life has turned out far better then I believed it ever could of, But.....just recently things have started to take a bit of turn and i think now would be a good time to come back, share some of my experiences and hopefully learn something new. Thanks and i look forward to chatting with you all. Hi Woodworker :-) That’s great to hear - really 😁 What things have made the most difference?
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mandible
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Post by mandible on Aug 16, 2019 13:44:49 GMT
Hi all, don't normally do message boards because I find them difficult to read - you may find me on Twitter - however in order to support fellow shinies and get info I thought I'd rock up here as well!
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Post by vagueandrandom on Aug 16, 2019 20:33:16 GMT
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Post by thomasintrouble on Sept 10, 2019 11:18:50 GMT
Hi Everyone, just had a session yesterday with the specialist who confirmed that I do have ADHD at the age of 42. Feel quite relieved as I now have a label for these things rather than just thinking of myself as lazy and disorganised. I'm going back in a few weeks to discuss medication, shouldn't get hopes up too much but I am quite excited about the prospect.
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Post by vagueandrandom on Sept 10, 2019 11:50:03 GMT
Hi Everyone, just had a session yesterday with the specialist who confirmed that I do have ADHD at the age of 42. Feel quite relieved as I now have a label for these things rather than just thinking of myself as lazy and disorganised. I'm going back in a few weeks to discuss medication, shouldn't get hopes up too much but I am quite excited about the prospect. Hi thomasintrouble 🙂
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Post by cursedgift on Dec 10, 2019 13:14:27 GMT
Hiya, recently diagnosed with severe inattentive ADHD at 44! Just wanted to say hello! Currently on Ritalin which has helped but I do feel agitated when on it so I need to start doing more mindfulness etc to counteract these feelings. It is nice to actually understand why I do what I do! I always suspected but never thought my diagnosis would score me so severe. I am in the 99.98 centile!!
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mamadedos
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Post by mamadedos on Jan 31, 2020 19:09:55 GMT
I've always known that I have always been relatively speaking quite hyper, but hadn't really put much thought into it. Reading about ADHD though really devastated me; all those things that I had thought were character defects, well they weren't. I've never understood why I've found so many things such a struggle, as am pretty smart. I'm also a little weirded out as how do I know what is me and what is ADHD? My sense of self is a little wobbly, but overall I feel some relief at finally understanding why some things are the way that they are. I'm also not sure how to deal with (some) people's reactions. If anyone has any suggestions when dealing with responses such as, "everyone's a bit ADHD" and other minimising responses, I'd really appreciate it. It's driving me potty. Hello, helenahandcart. Thanks for sharing. I can very much relate to your experience of believing in "character defects" all of my life. I was diagnosed at 49 and felt so much relief and regret. But over the last year+ that I have been on titration with meds (I think I am finally settling with my dosage and type), I have been learning more and more about who I really am, and I feel so, so grateful. I have read on this board a number of times, people asking, "Is it worth getting diagnosed even though I am --- years old?" To me, knowing about my condition is only serving to improve my life, my understanding and belief about myself, changing my outlook in many positive ways, allowing me to become the person I always had an inkling inside I was supposed to be. I am only just starting, for the first time ever in my half century walking this earth, to NOT feel self-conscious. It is absolutely life-changing. As for how to deal with people's responses, here is my personal experience. I am someone who is not afraid of letting people know about my issues (of which there are plenty!). However, I have learned throughout the years that there are different levels of personal exposure that are appropriate to a situation or to a relationship. I have had to take on some scars in order to learn what is appropriate for me. I still, sometimes, make mistakes and share too much with someone who is not capable of handling what I have said or who is not empathetic enough to honour my vulnerability. I do not tell most people I have ADHD. I share it in the appropriate context. I share it when I feel that a door has opened with someone or when I am working on opening a door in a relationship. I talk about it with the important people in my life. I have never had anyone say anything offensive, minimising or rejecting to me about my diagnosis. Most of the people who I have told are interested in hearing about it, so I am able to educate others about adult ADHD. Also, I never speak about it as an excuse for something I have done poorly. helenahandcart, here are some rhetorical questions for you to consider, if you are up for it. Do you feel that you are clear within yourself about how much is safe for you to share in a given situation? Do you feel comfortable for people to know about the ADHD? Are you using the ADHD to excuse yourself for certain behaviours? Are you able to identify who is or when it is safe for you to disclose the ADHD diagnosis to? Apart from the above, if you find yourself in a situation where someone is minimising you, you could respond with some sort of pre- composed line that is dignified and clever. Some ideas: I can understand why you might think that way, but adult ADHD is still only beginning to be understood and accepted within the medical community as a serious and unique condition, with different symptoms from childhood ADHD. If you are interested, I can give you some links about it. (Or, someone in one of these forums recently linked a new sort documentary video about adult ADHD....) or Actually, ADHD is a real disorder and people who have it have different wiring and chemistry in their brains. Even though everyone has moments of [disorganisation/disorder/impulsivity/you name it], people with ADHD struggle chronically with those symptoms, and as a result it affects their quality of life. Anyway, those might be sort of goofy, but you get the idea.
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delayed
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Post by delayed on Apr 7, 2020 23:07:10 GMT
Hello all, I had been looking at this forum a while back when ADHD was first thought of as diagnosis but as I hadnt been diagnosed I didnt register. The expected diagnosis will have to be delayed due to something about a Virus causing problems everywhere. I will be a late diagnosis at 56, could have been diagnosed at 6. Long time diagnosis of Chronic anxiety Depression which I always felt wasnt telling the full story. Going from failure to failure disaster to disaster throughout life. Why Why Why. About 6 months ago at a time of deep despair I made an appointment with GP for 1 last go at salvaging a life. I was given appointment with MR C. I queried the MR and was told he wasnt a GP but done what GPs do. OK then. Went for appointment Hello MR C that isnt a GP but does what GPs do, he started to say something but I kept going. I talked incesantly for about 10 minutes he said nothing. I stopped and said to MR C wait, what do you make of that. He replied I think you are misdiagnosed and undermedicated. Well blow me down who knew?. Eureka! fate has supplied an angel of sorts. He explained that he was standing in but his main field was Mental Health, and that his wife was a Psychologist. Long story short MR C referred me onwards and has been a great help through this. I spoke to him today as I had a letter from Psychiatrist to say that appointment for this week had been cancelled due to Virus. Not unexpected.. Anyway MR C has just said to hold firm I am still on file and hopefully it all catches up eventually. That is my brief introduction and reason for registering. I will write more later about my life of undiagnosed ADHD.
Best wishes. Delayed ( not my real name)
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tabby
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Post by tabby on Jul 18, 2020 15:55:53 GMT
Hi there. I can't seem to work out how to create a post. Feeling a bit thick, and bewildered by this forum
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Post by writerindisarray on Nov 17, 2020 23:21:30 GMT
Hello from a new member.
I was diagnosed in June via the NHS at 44 years old. At the end of the evaluation my psychiatrist said I had a clear-cut case of ADD, and then apologised for my not having been diagnosed when I was a child. Like many people, the diagnosis was a huge relief.
I want my ADD to be an asset and a resource, not a disorder. But I'm a long way off that right now. Right now, I need to learn about ADD, learn to accept that it is me and always has been and how to live with it, before I begin trying to put it to good use.
Aside from ADD, I've survived long periods of clinical depression, and am working at keeping an anxiety disorder in full retreat.
Work-wise, I'm a freelance copy editor (I want to retrain, but studying is hard because etc) and (frustrated) writer (because I have great ideas and never etc).
Non-work wise, a fun time for me is reading books (which I hoard like a dragon hoards gold), watching TV or a movie (or 20), or playing an RPG with friends (currently Call of Cthulhu). I live with a beautiful, friendly and increasingly grouchy black cat. And I'm so introverted, I barely notice Covid-19 lockdowns.
I joined here to learn about ADD, how to live with it, get support with that process and help others in return.
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Post by posib17736 on Jan 17, 2021 11:32:43 GMT
Hello, I have created an app for people with ADHD, it lets you to crave out several minutes to concentrate on you current goal. I believe it might help some people struggling with ADHD. play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.devisr.goalfocusPlease don't be critical, I have only good intentions.
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Post by whatnots2015 on Feb 13, 2021 15:34:11 GMT
Hello! I've just joined this forum! I'm looking forward to finding my way around :-) I'm currently awaiting assessment of ADHD / autism / both / neither and working on self-acceptance and strategies that could help both autistic people and people with ADHD.
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jules0767
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Posts: 1
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Post by jules0767 on Feb 19, 2021 16:54:33 GMT
Hi all, thank you for adding me to the group. ND profile includes dyspraxia, Dyscalculia (always known)and more recently identified ADHD and probably autistic. Never been formally assessed, am MH social worker so used knowledge and strategies to manage. Seeking support now as ADHD gone off the scales following hysterectomy and other issues. GP just made referral to Psych UK. It's just been very weird but finally my whole life makes sense! Looking forward to virtually meeting others. Jules
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red
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Post by red on Mar 10, 2021 22:11:37 GMT
Hi Everybody,
Just a quick 'Hello' from myself, really pleased that I've found the site and this forum having recently joined up a few of the pieces of my life and have an appointment next week with my Dr with a view to seeking a referral for diagnosis of personally suspected ADD. Until then I'll be looking to learn from everybody else who has followed this path before me.
Cheers,
Red
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Post by stibbins83 on Apr 5, 2021 16:18:00 GMT
Hello everyone,
I'm 37 and have dyspraxia and suspected ADHD. I know other people with these conditions though social groups in London. Look forward to chatting with people on the forums.
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Post by tenbirdsinacoat on Apr 16, 2021 12:00:01 GMT
Hello all, I'm new to the forum but have had my ADHD diagnosis 3 or 4 years now I think? I don't remember! It seems extremely likely that I am also autistic but its not something I've been able to get diagnosed yet as I was occupied with overcoming previous mental health problems (depression, borderline). I decided to join this forum to try to keep improving my ADHD coping mechanisms as I've done some work but it's just not quite enough to tip the scales over into consistently being functional! It's good to meet you all and a relief to be among people who understand what I'm going through!
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Post by TheTeaBoy on Apr 27, 2021 20:24:37 GMT
Hi everyone
Some time ago, A friend was talking about there A.D.H.D, how it is for them day to day and another friend there turned round to me and said thats exactly like you! It took some time but the seed was planted as I guess I had a very poor knowledge of ADHD i didn't think that I was like the sterotypical 3 year old running riot so it couldn't possibly be right! Cut to a few years later. Im 38 yrs of age and finally been diagnosed with ADHD. Finding out what the actual symptoms are and how it effects us has been constant light bulb moments. I feel like i could explode from all the feelings. My life and "failures" make sense. I read something about how others find it impacts on them and want to scream in recognition and also frustration of knowing that if id have known this growing up my mental health and self esteem may not of been so poor!
Just reading your posts above also makes me feel so much less lonely - in the fact that there are other people who get what its like being me, which is being someone with adhd not just this alien who isn't succeeding in living if you know what I mean! like we are succeeding despite it being harder to control certain aspects !!
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Post by Mermaid on May 19, 2021 22:30:46 GMT
Hello, I had a chance conversation with a friend who said she was diagnosed with Adult ADHD - I didn't know it was a thing but it made me look at the symptoms and I recognised myself. I have struggled since childhood with underachieving, poor timekeeping, juggling lots of work/projects at once but barely completing any, missed appointments as I either forget or double book, reckless behaviours, brushes with the law including a spell as a prolific shoplifter, various mental health diagnoses over the years but they don't reflect the 'overall' me. I have spoken with my GP and they are arranging for a referral for assessment. I feel I might be on the path to understanding why I am the way I am. Thanks for listening
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sunshine
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Post by sunshine on May 21, 2021 10:24:50 GMT
hello everyone, i'm 50 yo and in the last few years have been told by a friend's sister that she thought i was adhd, i didn't give it much thought at first, but eventually it sunk in and after researching it i'm shocked to totally agree with her, i've lived alone from the age of 18 so have never had anyone to pick up on my behaviour but now i've come to terms with the idea. i have finally got up the courage to call my doctor for a referral just a moment ago and he will call me beginning of june, he's a nice doctor so i'm ok with him helping.
when i think back through my life it all seems so obvious now!
thanks for letting me join, mark.
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Post by voltperoctave on Jun 25, 2021 14:59:47 GMT
Hi all,
I'm 49 and just diagnosed with combined ADHD. Not quite sure where to go from here, but my life suddenly makes a lot more sense. They are talking stimulant medication.
I'm a bit flat after the diagnosis- this sense of years of my life wasted or dreams unrealised. Anyone feel the same?
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kookykitten
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Cat crazy biker living life in purple!
Posts: 1
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Post by kookykitten on Jun 28, 2021 16:41:28 GMT
Hello there!
I am Kat also known as Kitty.
I am in my 50's, live in Yorkshire, a biker and a tad crazy about cats.
I have been in mental health services for almost 40 years since the age of 17. Last a year new forward thinking lead psychiatrist joined my local mental health team. They asked if I had ever had an assessment for ADHD and asked my GP to refer me. My GP absolutely against ADHD in adults and so it has been a huge battle just for me to get a referral. Anyway mental health team put pressure on him and eventually CCG agreed for me to have special permission and I have an assessment in November with Psychiatry-uk under the Right to Choose path. This is probably a same old story for a lot of people on this forum as it seems a common situation from looking at ADHD support groups in the UK. I appreciate it is a lack of services. I have been given multiple possible diagnoses over the last 40 years ranging from bipolar to BPD to complex PTSD to emotional instability disorder and everything in between. I must have been on 30-40 different types of psychiatric medication and not one single pill made a jot of difference. I have had hundreds of psychotherapy hours and never moved forward. What this has cost the NHS is shameful.
I also have Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, hypermobile type. This is also something that I was born with. It was not picked up until I reached my late 30s when I began to dislocate my limbs much more frequently. Prior to this I used to pop them in and out as a bit of a party trick to entertain people and if I got bored as their reactions amused me. It starts to hurt more now I'm older though! I was born with dual hearing loss and I lost the sight in my left eye in 2018. All good fun! There are lots of other health problems and complications with the syndrome but I will not bore you with them here...
I have had zero success with relationships one of which turned abusive because he didn't feel gave enough to the marriage so I ran taking the kids.
I was deemed as an unsuitable mother once I was a single parent and in all honesty they were probably right. I couldn't even look after myself let alone two children. My daughter now in her mid 20s is back in my life thankfully over the last 3 or 4 years. My son still remains estranged although I have seen him in a couple of 5-minutes bursts a few times recently.
I have moved many times as eventually the social circle I have have in the new place tails off with friends fed up and frustrated with me. Life is lonely so I end up moving again. I am the queen of re-invention!
Cats are my emotional sanity and motorcycles my addiction & excitement.
Thanks for staying with me till the end of this introduction! I'm going to have a mooch around the forum so will probably pop-up around the boards in different threads.
Did I mention I love purple?....
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Post by squishymermaid on Jul 8, 2021 22:27:14 GMT
Hi everyone I've not really used forums before and I'm new on here. I have ADHD inattentive type and even though it was diagnosed ages ago I've been really struggling recently, since I started my new job in the private sector. I think I'm now really coming to terms with having it.. listening to an audiobook about how it affects women has blown me away and I'm realising how much my struggles throughout life have probably been due to ahdh. Anyway I'm so happy i found this forum! I just want to connect with ppl who know how hard it is!! By it I mean coping with life. I'm 41 and a mental health nurse.
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Post by squishymermaid on Jul 13, 2021 20:10:06 GMT
Hello, I had a chance conversation with a friend who said she was diagnosed with Adult ADHD - I didn't know it was a thing but it made me look at the symptoms and I recognised myself. I have struggled since childhood with underachieving, poor timekeeping, juggling lots of work/projects at once but barely completing any, missed appointments as I either forget or double book, reckless behaviours, brushes with the law including a spell as a prolific shoplifter, various mental health diagnoses over the years but they don't reflect the 'overall' me. I have spoken with my GP and they are arranging for a referral for assessment. I feel I might be on the path to understanding why I am the way I am. Thanks for listening This is my third attempt trying to respond on this forum... I'm new to forums! I just wanted to say hi to mermaid, because I'm also a mermaid lol... :-) Good luck getting your assessment keep persevering with it!
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vtt
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Post by vtt on Jul 16, 2021 8:25:53 GMT
Hi, I’m a 44 year old man with no diagnosis as yet. I’m terrified and hopeful in equal measure, with regard to what might be.
My life has deteriorated significantly in the last five years and I’m now able to see obvious patterns after doing some research of my own, lots of boxes have been mentally ticked recently. I can trace behaviours back to roughly 10/11 years of age, but not much before that. I’m continually overwhelmed, exhausted, frustrated, scared and anxious. It’s not a fun way to live and I really hope that I can get some help soon.
My mind is like a pinball machine and seems to be getting worse, I’m not sure if that’s because I’ve started researching and have effectively ‘diagnosed’ myself! I don’t feel like I’m really living my life, I’m literally stumbling through an existence.
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alexred
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Posts: 17
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Post by alexred on Jul 18, 2021 13:16:05 GMT
Nice to meet you. I'm Red, in my twenties. I do okay for myself but ADHD is a killer. Just completed titration and getting handed back to the NHS to see what the next steps are.
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Post by jensy on Aug 7, 2021 7:44:22 GMT
Hi All
Im 47 got diagnosed at 27 but muddled through since without meds and now am deciding to go back to try and maybe also do some lifestyle things that also may help.... thats along with all my other ideas!! but good to be in touch with like minded people.
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