Post by seeclearly74 on Sept 23, 2018 19:40:31 GMT
Hiya Everyone,
I stumbled across this forum while researching about ADHD and have been lurking for a while. I decided to make an account and join.
I will give you some background info...
I married my husband at a young age 25 years ago. We had our first child in 1997, over the next 8 years I went on to have 3 more children ...I always thought life would get better.
There have been constant issues throughout our whole relationship i.e money problems,drugs/alcohol,work problems,never finishing projects or doing what he says he will do, finding it hard to take responsibility but the hardest thing has been all the lies. Again and again me and my children would be let down and we couldn’t understand why he would keep treating us this way. This undermined every bit of trust I had in him and things fell apart.
Everything came to a head last year after being let down in a big way again by my husband that I sadly thought this could be the end of our marriage...but it wasn’t really what I wanted as I do love him deep down and always have.
After thinking everything over I decided to give things one last try but stil things weren’t how they should be....
After a disastrous holiday abroad last year due to my husbands behaviour my eldest daughter said that she is sure her dad has a mental illness as his behaviour isn’t right.
So I started putting symptoms into google, I came across ADHD symptoms and read my husband the list...he choked up.
Since then I have looked up so much stuff online and read so many articles.
I found an article explaining what is feels like to have ADHD and he was shocked and said this is exactly how he feels, he could never put it into words before,but that this was it.
Things have been a little easier since as I have researched about being a wife of someone who has ADHD and what things I need to do butvwe need more help.
We are convinced that this has been with him all his life (he’s 47)...he started thinking back to childhood situations at school/home and found school reports that support his behaviour as a child.
Last week we went to the G.P, explained what we thought, took along a couple of self tests (which he scored highly on)!and asked for a referral to a soeacialist who deals with ADHD. She had no problems doing this so now it’s just a waiting game, even though I’m not quite sure who he’s being referred to.
We are in an outer London borough and have no idea of waiting lists etc.
I will ring the G.P tomorrow to see where he’s actually been referred to and how long we can expect to wait.
I am looking for groups in the Essex/London area as I think this could be helpful for us to meet others in a similar position.
I just want to say thank you to everyone in this forum as it’s been so helpful to read about other people’s experiences and an eye opener that’s for sure.
Sorry for the long post....
I stumbled across this forum while researching about ADHD and have been lurking for a while. I decided to make an account and join.
I will give you some background info...
I married my husband at a young age 25 years ago. We had our first child in 1997, over the next 8 years I went on to have 3 more children ...I always thought life would get better.
There have been constant issues throughout our whole relationship i.e money problems,drugs/alcohol,work problems,never finishing projects or doing what he says he will do, finding it hard to take responsibility but the hardest thing has been all the lies. Again and again me and my children would be let down and we couldn’t understand why he would keep treating us this way. This undermined every bit of trust I had in him and things fell apart.
Everything came to a head last year after being let down in a big way again by my husband that I sadly thought this could be the end of our marriage...but it wasn’t really what I wanted as I do love him deep down and always have.
After thinking everything over I decided to give things one last try but stil things weren’t how they should be....
After a disastrous holiday abroad last year due to my husbands behaviour my eldest daughter said that she is sure her dad has a mental illness as his behaviour isn’t right.
So I started putting symptoms into google, I came across ADHD symptoms and read my husband the list...he choked up.
Since then I have looked up so much stuff online and read so many articles.
I found an article explaining what is feels like to have ADHD and he was shocked and said this is exactly how he feels, he could never put it into words before,but that this was it.
Things have been a little easier since as I have researched about being a wife of someone who has ADHD and what things I need to do butvwe need more help.
We are convinced that this has been with him all his life (he’s 47)...he started thinking back to childhood situations at school/home and found school reports that support his behaviour as a child.
Last week we went to the G.P, explained what we thought, took along a couple of self tests (which he scored highly on)!and asked for a referral to a soeacialist who deals with ADHD. She had no problems doing this so now it’s just a waiting game, even though I’m not quite sure who he’s being referred to.
We are in an outer London borough and have no idea of waiting lists etc.
I will ring the G.P tomorrow to see where he’s actually been referred to and how long we can expect to wait.
I am looking for groups in the Essex/London area as I think this could be helpful for us to meet others in a similar position.
I just want to say thank you to everyone in this forum as it’s been so helpful to read about other people’s experiences and an eye opener that’s for sure.
Sorry for the long post....