Hello everyone. Apologies for the unfinished subject name but I was unsure how to word it. I am unsure if anyone here knows about Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN) but I am having psychotherapy because of my mental health diagnosis's and my childhood has been something that I am struggling to deal with. Throughout my childhood I was the one that wouldn't do as I was told / argue etc. I was diagnosed in my early 20s with ADHD so my parents, as well as me were totally oblivious to why I behaved the way I did. During my childhood after some heated arguments my dad would sometimes go for days without talking to me because I did something wrong- which although I did do something wrong it was so difficult to deal with. I would try to apologise and talk to my dad and I would get upset but he would just ignore me and at the time it was so hard to deal with. My mum would take my dad's side so when he was around she wouldn't interact with me. I know this is a long shot but I am hoping I can find someone or some people that can relate. I am sure that I can't be the only undiagnosed adhd kid that was emotionally neglected.
For anyone unsure on what CEN is here is a link which will help give you an understanding of the subject:
That sounds really tough. I had something similar with my mum - when things got bad enough she would shut down and ignore me. It was never for days though - usually max of one day. But it was very distressing; sometimes she would shut me out of her room in silence while I cried on the other side of the door saying sorry. For hours. But I think she has issues too, so it's hard to blame her completely for it. She never says sorry to this day! But hey ho. I don't think I suffer from many of the issues mentioned - maybe worrying too much what others think of me, even if I logically tell myself, "who cares?!". I luckily had my dad who was always a lot more supportive emotionally. And my mum wasn't entirely non supportive, it just depended on her mood and how crazy I was being.
Sorry I can't relate anymore, but at least you're in a good place to find support here - I recently joined the Facebook group, so if you like you can try reaching out there <3
Hey Duckester I can relate to what you are saying. My 10 year old daughter has anger outbursts on a daily basis and in an attempt to help her, I've been researching ADHD. I now believe that I also have undiagnosed ADHD and I really relate to what you say about your childhood
i was the epitome of the troubled child of the 80s before anyone called it adhd it was called being a naughty little fucker..
i was kicked out of three primary schools, one high school all for outbursts an my inability to lisetn to teacher or anyone else (BUT I EXCELLED ACADEMICALLY??? AT LEAST WHEN I WAS ALLOWED IN THE HALL TO DO THE EXAMS, ID DO THEM AN LEAVE BEFORE MOST HAD STARTED BUT TEACHER DIDNT LIKE IT IF I COULD EXPLAIN HOW I WORKED STUFF OUT "i can see the answer in my head" just was not acceptable to my maths teacher!!!!!!
My parents just stonewalled it and ignored it, rather they carried on working late all time an just leaving me alone ot do what i wanted.
Given house keys at 9 an being told to stay out of the way was not helping..
i ended up kicked out of school, my mum disappeared saying she couldnt cope and i ended up in jail by 17, parents never even came to see me in four years, got out an rebuilt my life a bit. didnt ever speak to mum again..
10 odd years on, id been sacked time after time for anger issues, then turned to weed to manage my as yest undiagnosed issues..got bewtter an able to work, held down good jobs, promotions to team management allsorts!!!!
now 20 years on i had a huge mental breakdown due to my ex neglecting my child.. i lost my whole world, then get diagnosed an now im a single dad trying to raise a 2 year old girl while managing my adhd issues an bipolar too
i have no meds, no support, no idea where to turn now or whats going to happen but i DO NOT want my children to go through what i did so i am trying to learn all i can in case my kids have what i have.. Id be grateful for any insight or supprort anyone can offer
izzibear: Jax, did you get anywhere with the private option? My 19-year-old daughter was diagnosed with ADHD as a child but now Adult Services are refusing to renew her meds as they say her case isn't "severe" enough.
Jun 29, 2020 8:59:16 GMT
incredibethy: hi my name is Beth, am 40 with adult adhd and been struggling for many years with thinking before I speak. I tried mindfulness and it leaves me depressed. Can anyone recoomend an affordable therapy option (I can master up to 50 pounds a session)
Jun 19, 2020 10:21:13 GMT
moodie: hello adhd peeps ..... anyone else on dexamphets n finding it hard to deal w dehydration?
Jun 17, 2020 12:44:55 GMT
jax: Hi, I have just registered on this forum, frustrated at delays waiting for my son to be assessed re ADD at Petherton, considering private route instead, any advice?
Jun 6, 2020 15:37:16 GMT
vagueandrandom: zelda look at my post about NHS Right to Choose in Reviews secction.
Jun 5, 2020 17:18:49 GMT
zelda: Hi, I’m a 60 year old who has always struggled with anxiety and depression. My GP has suggested I may have ADD and we’ve done the ADD ASRS questionnaire but I’m told I can’t be referred as there are no services for adults my age. Any suggestions?
Jun 3, 2020 7:41:31 GMT
jacob13: Hi, I'm a young professional and my private doctor won't prescribe me Elvanse until I pass a drug's test, I'm 3 weeks sober from cannabis but still testing positive and may continue to test positive for THC for a long time. I'm looking for recommendations
May 24, 2020 16:25:42 GMT
greenfern: Hello, I'm a 42-year-old mum and struggling with (undiagnosed) inattentive ADHD. Would like to talk to others in the same (messy and disorganised) boat.
May 23, 2020 12:33:57 GMT
ninakay: no help in U.K. at all scared to the thought of no light at the end of the tunnel feel so pathetic and inadequate don’t know where to turn
May 23, 2020 12:27:31 GMT
ninakay: Hi I’m Nina I’m 50 And having trouble getting diagnosed being told I will have to come off my anti depressants first
May 23, 2020 12:26:18 GMT
flowergirl: Hi I'm new and very keen to find other women living with ADHD. I'm 48, diagnosed 4 years ago, Converta XL helps me hugely, but hormones try to up-end any equilibrium. Not much support in the UK for women with ADHD. Anyone out there who can advise?
May 18, 2020 9:06:45 GMT
piratesm: nightowl and urcapable. Please could you send me that helpful link regarding going private?
Mar 27, 2020 23:41:50 GMT
musictomyears: Hi, I am 50 and recently diagnosed with ADHD and Autism. I found Methyphenidate gave me anxiety. Just going to try Elvanse. Any women out there think that the menopause makes everything worse?
Mar 19, 2020 21:07:05 GMT
nightowl: Hi. I'm newly diagnosed ADHD (inattentive) at 47. I have some questions about the cost of drugs going private so will be looking on here. Meanwhile thanks to urcapable for the helpful link. My daughter is dyslexic too so that will help!
Feb 10, 2020 14:36:16 GMT
kate: Hello I'm a 50 year old lady just realising I have ADHD.
Jan 31, 2020 20:55:05 GMT
mamadedos: Anyone, everyone posting in the Shoutbox: If you would like a response or want to interact with other members, please go to the Forum and post in Introductions or Lounge or any of the topical boards. There is no way to get in touch with you from here.
Jan 30, 2020 21:03:29 GMT
silver: My wonderful Mother recently declared I was diagnosed ADD, as a child. This would have happened sometime in the late 70's. Hmmm. Seriously? This is either a 'golden opportunity' or 'poison chalice' Current status.... sitting on the fence
Jan 21, 2020 10:41:59 GMT
toshi: Hi ,there, I am 49 years old mum of 10 years old kid. I am bad parent, and it's made my kid unwell, my husband pointed out I have to change how I behave towards to my kid. NHS discharged me already, as they don't have any source in Cambridge.
Jan 17, 2020 21:45:27 GMT