Post by lovesharpeis on Jul 11, 2020 16:00:05 GMT
I was diagnosed ADHD few months ago 37 yr old woman who was always treated as anxiety and depression.
The main issue though was never depression but anxiety.
The main focus is if I think I've done something wrong I get a rush if panic that can last from hours to days(as I've got older not really days) without calming in between.
It always seems to be worse of a morning and then settles as the day goes on and is very much associated with my periods
When I say I've done something wrong it's not that I'm worried about myself but I ruminate on the thing j think I've done wrong and basically torture myself with this ruminatiin. A good example is when I was a student I had an interest free overdraft but I left the course after a few months however still had the interest free overdraft for the reminder of the course length (years ago and all paid off now). When I got the panic it was that I got something I shouldn't have been entitled to and that is bad/wrong and I would think about it over and over.
Rationally most people would not be bothered about this or even give it a second thought but when I get panic it is always about something I think I've done wrong because I haven't followed the 'rules' exactly.
So I tried telling myself "so what if you've done something wrong" but the feeling of anxiety is awful I can't seem to except this until eventually I don't know why but mostly if I'm distracted i.e busy with work(shifts) I just stop thinking about and this seems to break the cycle till next time. Like I've ran out if panic!
It's always the same theme I feel I've done something wrong and it's that feeling that really causes me distress.
Now with ADHD I have read about rejection sensitivity dysphoria and it is the only time I have read something that I feel actually describes my experiences above. I don't have general anxiety it's always this one theme. Otherwise I am pretty chilled out.
I feel quite alone in this problem as I don't know anyone else who has anxiety like me with this theme and people find it hard to understand. They will try to help by saying don't worry or so what if you've done something wrong but this doesn't help.
when I was younger I used to "confess" things I had done wrong i.e. to uni tutor that I had not filled in my work exactly to the rules.....they would reassure me that it was ok (I was taking the rules to the word) and then I would relax. But then my mind would find another "wrong" to replace it. So I stopp d doing this w long time ago as it only made me feel temporarily better and seemed to perpetuate the problem as I'd find something else I had done wrong! ADHD medications are brill but they only work after I've taken them so certain points in the month(premenstrual) I get the symptoms(always seem to wake up with this panic and then it will wear off as day goes on....like I've ran out of it) and this month have been bad again.
Suppose I'm writing this as I want to know about others who experience what I have or similar. If anyone has and has tips on how they manage it or even just tell me their story so I know this is not me but part of the ADHD(still have imposter syndrome.....what if I'm not ADHD and they made a mistake etc!)
Thanks so much
The main issue though was never depression but anxiety.
The main focus is if I think I've done something wrong I get a rush if panic that can last from hours to days(as I've got older not really days) without calming in between.
It always seems to be worse of a morning and then settles as the day goes on and is very much associated with my periods
When I say I've done something wrong it's not that I'm worried about myself but I ruminate on the thing j think I've done wrong and basically torture myself with this ruminatiin. A good example is when I was a student I had an interest free overdraft but I left the course after a few months however still had the interest free overdraft for the reminder of the course length (years ago and all paid off now). When I got the panic it was that I got something I shouldn't have been entitled to and that is bad/wrong and I would think about it over and over.
Rationally most people would not be bothered about this or even give it a second thought but when I get panic it is always about something I think I've done wrong because I haven't followed the 'rules' exactly.
So I tried telling myself "so what if you've done something wrong" but the feeling of anxiety is awful I can't seem to except this until eventually I don't know why but mostly if I'm distracted i.e busy with work(shifts) I just stop thinking about and this seems to break the cycle till next time. Like I've ran out if panic!
It's always the same theme I feel I've done something wrong and it's that feeling that really causes me distress.
Now with ADHD I have read about rejection sensitivity dysphoria and it is the only time I have read something that I feel actually describes my experiences above. I don't have general anxiety it's always this one theme. Otherwise I am pretty chilled out.
I feel quite alone in this problem as I don't know anyone else who has anxiety like me with this theme and people find it hard to understand. They will try to help by saying don't worry or so what if you've done something wrong but this doesn't help.
when I was younger I used to "confess" things I had done wrong i.e. to uni tutor that I had not filled in my work exactly to the rules.....they would reassure me that it was ok (I was taking the rules to the word) and then I would relax. But then my mind would find another "wrong" to replace it. So I stopp d doing this w long time ago as it only made me feel temporarily better and seemed to perpetuate the problem as I'd find something else I had done wrong! ADHD medications are brill but they only work after I've taken them so certain points in the month(premenstrual) I get the symptoms(always seem to wake up with this panic and then it will wear off as day goes on....like I've ran out of it) and this month have been bad again.
Suppose I'm writing this as I want to know about others who experience what I have or similar. If anyone has and has tips on how they manage it or even just tell me their story so I know this is not me but part of the ADHD(still have imposter syndrome.....what if I'm not ADHD and they made a mistake etc!)
Thanks so much