I spoke to my GP this morning; half an hour on the phone, and he says it certainly sounds like it's ADHD, but because I've had CBT for anxiety in the past, and because I've had probable ADHD for so long I've created my own coping mechanisms, there's not really anything they can do to help.
Not great; but he's right that I've created some stuff to help me, over the years.
One thing I really do need help with is time. And how chaotic it is. The best way to describe it is that I feel like I'm living in a jar of bees.
If I've got one thing to do (walking the dog at 4.00pm, say), then everything is focused towards that point. I can't settle to do anything else, because all the time leading up to 4.00pm is just....time leading up to 4.00pm.
If I have several things to do in a day (walk dog, put laundry on, spend an hour in the office), I'm overwhelmed at how chaotic it feels. It's too much. Too many things. Too many bees!
If any of you feel the same way - and have any advice on how to cope - I'd be very, very grateful!
YES! THIS!! Perfect explanation of what it can be like. For tasks that I enjoy, the focus on that one item will dominate to the point everything else is put to one side, or if several things require my attention it's jumbled up like clothes in a tumble drier.
For example, got to put out the garden bins, so I can sort the garden, and get a new shed built, so I don't have to clutter my house. Put the bin out, put the bin out, put the.....oh that's a nice shed to buy, I could put a new bike in there, oh look at that bike, I could go on holiday on that, starts researching holidays as the bin lorry sails past in the background........
I try to keep a list in a notebook to score off through the day, as I find the multitude of 'organisational' apps confuses me due to overlap with other apps, but the notebook list often ends up being a moving target. I feel it's about finding something that works for you and trying to turn that into a habit, I am trying 'reminders' on my phone which has helped in recent weeks.
Post by maybemaybenot on Apr 12, 2021 13:33:48 GMT
I cannot even tell you the relief at knowing someone else feels the same! I have a feeling I'm going to be very much involved in this forum...! I find the reminders helpful to a point (I even set reminders to remind me to set alarms!) but it doesn't bring me any peace, which is my ultimate goal! Thank you for replying, though; it means a lot!
Like you, I also have a history of depression and anxiety linked to other events, but now think part of it could be ADHD as well, I only looked into it recently after a friend who has ADHD (I had no idea) suggested it. I would also spend a fair bit of time wondering if other people found what I see as normal life, so difficult.
Post by noemiamorphous on Apr 12, 2021 20:26:16 GMT
Oh yeah, this is so relatable... I explain it as being 'temporally challenged' (as this makes me sound like a Time Lord, not a clocktime spanner!) I've also had massive anxiety issues, some of which are unrelated to my neurodivergence, but after working through so much, there was still something that just didn't add up.
I was fianlly diagnosed ADH at 48 (and a bunch of other spectrum traits, as we all know it ain't as simple as an one acronym) What a relief that has been! I finally make sense, after a lifetime of feeling defective, with an inability to answer tricky questions such as "You're clearly intelligent, why can't you just..." and "Have you tried trying?". Yeah, I have. So much. And I can't. Now I can manage other's and (more importantly) my own expectations more realistically, be kinder to myself, find my idiosyncrasies endearing, recognise that there are things I can do amazingly well, if not consistently, and find joy and pride in those. I reckon that's so much more important than doing twelvety9 things in the right order at the right time.
This does make life in this society/culture more difficult for us ADH crew (I've sacked off the D, I genuinely don't view my neurodivergence as a 'disorder' rather a cognitive difference which makes adulting in this society uneccesarily difficult) I'm not sure who to credit this quote to, but "it is no measure of health to be sane in a profoundly sick society".
I know someone else who does this, writes down little wins for sticking to a pre-determined plan, having a chocolate biscuit, having a burger etc and mostly seems to work for them.
I am 'trying' to do this, as currently, I'm really struggling to get my work completed at home, I cannot make myself start a task, something is blocking me, despite knowing the worry that comes later at night from completely wasting the day.
The list gets completed, I just have to make a habit of 'actually' getting on to things so I can tick them off, and do the good stuff too.
Post by tenbirdsinacoat on Apr 16, 2021 12:20:34 GMT
I totally get how you feel. Personally I don't respond well to reward or treat based breaks or planned schedules so I live and die by timers and alarms in these situations. So to take your example of walking the dog at 4, if it was me I'd set some alarms fore before 4; -one being the approximate amount of time it takes you to find the lead, get dressed and generally ready to go. It doesn't have to be extremely precise and it helps to leave 5-10mins extra. I tend to use either 15mins or 30mins before. -one being an hour earlier than the getting ready alarm. Both need to be labelled as what the alarms mean ie. "Getting Ready in 1hr", "Time to Get Ready" so that you know what they mean. Making the sound they make not your usual sound of alarm helps them stand out.
From there I then see how much time I have until the "getting Ready in 1hr" alarm and look at a loose list I keep of what I need to do today in an easy to see place ie "Colour Laundry, Load Dishwasher, Study Module 2". I set a time for 25-40mins (depends on how energetic I feel that day) and challenge myself to do as much of whichever task seems easiest for that timer. When that timer goes off I take a break. I repeat this for as much as I feel like I can until I hear those alarms.
Yes maybemaybenot, this is definitely a thing for me too. Great suggestions regarding lists and alarms - it's very important to know how long things take - stuff I put off thinking it's going to take the whole day ends up only taking maybe half an hour to an hour but knowing I've got to do it actually wastes more time beforehand! Work is like this for me, knowing I've got to go to bed at a certain time and go to work the next day and I'm virtually paralysed the previous evening, can't do anything but anticipate that early bedtime!
INxP Culture is not your friend You've got to go over the top to find out what's on the other side / Break on through
dariuso: Please see details in my post at Research Opportunities.
May 10, 2021 9:15:13 GMT
dariuso: Research participants wanted (Skype interview)! Wanted adults (30 and 65 years old), with English as your first language, with an official diagnosis of ADHD who tried hypnotherapy (first session within the last 24 months but more than 1 month ago)
May 10, 2021 9:10:54 GMT
sofiavyas: Hello, I am a freelance journalist and investigative journalism postgraduate student looking into ADHD for a feature article. Please take a look at my post in Research Opportunities and let me know if you might be able to help. Thanks so much!
May 6, 2021 9:45:21 GMT
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Apr 30, 2021 17:56:17 GMT
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Apr 30, 2021 17:53:55 GMT
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Apr 30, 2021 17:51:40 GMT
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Apr 30, 2021 17:47:35 GMT
humptydumpty999: I now told the doctor i was going to Spain and he became angry again ! He new that he was going to be found out to be a liar ! I went to Spain where i saw a doctor and said Systemic candida Albicans !
Apr 30, 2021 17:46:33 GMT
humptydumpty999: diagnosis had turned into a stab in the back as even after my complaints to the nhs i was not taken seriously and it was obvious that everyone was listening to the Psychiatrist ! You could almost hear them saying !" Oh he is Bipolar !
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humptydumpty999: and incompetance. My family had contacted the diagnosisng Psychiatrist who swiftly removed himself from Facebook ! sending him a letter with the Nutritionmist findings we told him that it made a mockery of his diagnosis ! What had been a stab in the dark
Apr 30, 2021 17:41:06 GMT
humptydumpty999: I had told the doctor that i was a co dependent ! and now they knew i had a weakness that they could exploit ! I would put the doctors needs before my own and give him a letter saying that I would not be holding the NHs responsible for their negligence
Apr 30, 2021 17:38:24 GMT
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Apr 30, 2021 17:35:58 GMT
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Apr 30, 2021 17:34:31 GMT
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