Post by spada on Jan 22, 2015 16:15:12 GMT
Hi all,
I've been with my partner for nearly two years, and he's been diagnosed with ADHD for about a year of that.
I care about him a great deal, but lately the burden had just become a bit too much. I can't rely on him to be anywhere or do anything. He'll not answer his phone or reply to anything for days, to me or his parents. I feel very alone in the relationship. On top of that, it seems that he's unable to hold down a job, so I have to pay for everything, and he's now thousands of pounds in debt to me. This stresses me out as I feel trapped in the relationship, and am starting to resent him. I realise that he hates being in debt, but he also never mentions it, and I feel like I'm just taken for granted a lot. Then it seems like in the times when he could make a bit of an effort, he just doesn't bother. I don't expect a lot at all, all I want is someone I can trust and rely on, but I can't see what there is in this relationship for me much anymore.
Anyway, I'm not ready to give up just yet, so wanted to ask advice on what he can do to try to control the situation. He doesn't want to take meds, which I'm 100% okay with as that's his decision. He has read a lot about it the condition and is aware of the triggers and behavior patterns, but that doesn't necessarily help. (I rationalise it to myself as wanting to lose weight and knowing that the cake will not help matters, but eating it anyway).
A friend of mine suffers from OCD and has been seeing a therapist on the NHS once a week for about 2 months and she has said that she finds it really beneficial. Because she's got someone actively monitoring her and challenging her weekly, she's more aware of what she's doing, and she's doing the practical exercises to try to cope with her condition.
Does anyone know if this sort of thing is available for adult ADHD sufferers? As this might be something that might help my partner.
Any advice on this, or any other methods of trying to help someone with ADHD would be really helpful.
I've been with my partner for nearly two years, and he's been diagnosed with ADHD for about a year of that.
I care about him a great deal, but lately the burden had just become a bit too much. I can't rely on him to be anywhere or do anything. He'll not answer his phone or reply to anything for days, to me or his parents. I feel very alone in the relationship. On top of that, it seems that he's unable to hold down a job, so I have to pay for everything, and he's now thousands of pounds in debt to me. This stresses me out as I feel trapped in the relationship, and am starting to resent him. I realise that he hates being in debt, but he also never mentions it, and I feel like I'm just taken for granted a lot. Then it seems like in the times when he could make a bit of an effort, he just doesn't bother. I don't expect a lot at all, all I want is someone I can trust and rely on, but I can't see what there is in this relationship for me much anymore.
Anyway, I'm not ready to give up just yet, so wanted to ask advice on what he can do to try to control the situation. He doesn't want to take meds, which I'm 100% okay with as that's his decision. He has read a lot about it the condition and is aware of the triggers and behavior patterns, but that doesn't necessarily help. (I rationalise it to myself as wanting to lose weight and knowing that the cake will not help matters, but eating it anyway).
A friend of mine suffers from OCD and has been seeing a therapist on the NHS once a week for about 2 months and she has said that she finds it really beneficial. Because she's got someone actively monitoring her and challenging her weekly, she's more aware of what she's doing, and she's doing the practical exercises to try to cope with her condition.
Does anyone know if this sort of thing is available for adult ADHD sufferers? As this might be something that might help my partner.
Any advice on this, or any other methods of trying to help someone with ADHD would be really helpful.