nel77
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Post by nel77 on Nov 5, 2013 0:09:58 GMT
I get confused about whether it's OCD or Aspergers - I can get upset by lack of order around me. I also think Aspergers morphs into inattentive ADHD in a spectrum stylee. Aspergers, I describe people who have as socially clumsy, they don't understand unwritten social rules. I think that people, certainly me, with ADHD do understand them but lack of attention or a jumping busy mind causes us to break rule but realise after.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Nov 5, 2013 0:21:17 GMT
Agreed.
I think the overlap is completely coincidental with the ADHD overlap being coping mechanisms to avoid the ensuing mental onslaught whereas the Aspergers types have a deep rooted preference for being of order and neatness. I would say there is precisely zero in common where ADHD PI and Aspergers are concerned.
Just my opinion and I would love to be proved wrong (or right).
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nel77
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Post by nel77 on Nov 5, 2013 0:32:35 GMT
Agreed. I think the overlap is completely coincidental with the ADHD overlap being coping mechanisms to avoid the ensuing mental onslaught whereas the Aspergers types have a deep rooted preference for being of order and neatness. I would say there is precisely zero in common where ADHD PI and Aspergers are concerned. Just my opinion and I would love to be proved wrong (or right). :-)
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paul
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Post by paul on Nov 5, 2013 12:32:37 GMT
Hi everyone I'm Paul, I'm 53 and have just (i.e. formally in the last week) been diagnosed with ADHD (innattentive type) - This has been a long journey for me - full of depression, suicide attempts, low self esteem (loathing). I suppose I'm lucky in that I am smart enough to have done reasonably well at school etc (even with the last minute revision, lack of focus, inability to keep on the same thought for more than two minutes etc etc etc). I always felt out of synch with the world. Did well early in my career when I was designing IT systems - I could map out how the system would work in my head - but let my team do the detail stuff. Went into management and did more and more repetitive things - budgets, paperwork, reviews etc and it was then that the depression really hit - didn't seem to achieve anything, was behind in lots of work, took too much on, didn't do the paperwork I "needed" to do.
Most of the help I was given was anti depressants - sertraline, citalopram etc etc. And for 10 years I really battled the depression. Left my job in 2008 - couldn't take it anymore and I now work as a photographer. Got a break earlier this year when I got into the second tier of Mental Health and via various crisis teams and initial attempts at CBT got in front of a psychologist who put me through an Aspergers test - I scored high but the aspergers expert suggested ADHD - the only thing I knew about it was "naughty kid syndrome" - so I started reading and felt it described my life - the frustrations, the failures, why I was like I was - for the first time I thought maybe I'm not a worthless human being - I'd not even told my wife of 33 years that I struggled at work and that I was as disorganised at work as I was at home and how that used to get me into trouble - too ashamed!!!
The consultant spoke to my wife and I spoke to my mum who filled in some gaps and confirmed others.
Trouble is I don't really know where to start - I've started looking at time management software but I've been down this road so many times with so many pieces of software, diaries, filofaxes and its good for about a day (maybe 2) then I go to something else
Any thoughts at all would be appreciated
Paul
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Post by contrarymary on Nov 5, 2013 13:14:11 GMT
Hi everyone I'm Paul, I'm 53 and have just (i.e. formally in the last week) been diagnosed with ADHD (innattentive type) - This has been a long journey for me - full of depression, suicide attempts, low self esteem (loathing). I suppose I'm lucky in that I am smart enough to have done reasonably well at school etc (even with the last minute revision, lack of focus, inability to keep on the same thought for more than two minutes etc etc etc). I always felt out of synch with the world. Did well early in my career when I was designing IT systems - I could map out how the system would work in my head - but let my team do the detail stuff. Went into management and did more and more repetitive things - budgets, paperwork, reviews etc and it was then that the depression really hit - didn't seem to achieve anything, was behind in lots of work, took too much on, didn't do the paperwork I "needed" to do.
Most of the help I was given was anti depressants - sertraline, citalopram etc etc. And for 10 years I really battled the depression. Left my job in 2008 - couldn't take it anymore and I now work as a photographer. Got a break earlier this year when I got into the second tier of Mental Health and via various crisis teams and initial attempts at CBT got in front of a psychologist who put me through an Aspergers test - I scored high but the aspergers expert suggested ADHD - the only thing I knew about it was "naughty kid syndrome" - so I started reading and felt it described my life - the frustrations, the failures, why I was like I was - for the first time I thought maybe I'm not a worthless human being - I'd not even told my wife of 33 years that I struggled at work and that I was as disorganised at work as I was at home and how that used to get me into trouble - too ashamed!!!
The consultant spoke to my wife and I spoke to my mum who filled in some gaps and confirmed others.
Trouble is I don't really know where to start - I've started looking at time management software but I've been down this road so many times with so many pieces of software, diaries, filofaxes and its good for about a day (maybe 2) then I go to something else
Any thoughts at all would be appreciated
Paul
welcome Paul - i'm just reposting your post in a format i can read more anon, when i've been able to read it.
contrary mary
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Post by Kathymel on Nov 5, 2013 13:57:27 GMT
Hi Paul. Welcome to the forum and congratulations for battling through the MH system to get to a diagnosis. I think one of our best organised members is DKL - darkknightslover. She's got a filofax and any number of systems to make herself remember things. I'm sure she would be OK if you PMed her to ask for advice. Something I've seen recently which has had good recommendations are a couple of aps called ADHD Angel and ADHD Guardian. I've downloaded one of them, I think, but haven't quite got round to trying it yet ...
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Post by contrarymary on Nov 5, 2013 15:09:49 GMT
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paul
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Post by paul on Nov 5, 2013 21:53:30 GMT
Thanks Mary
I've looked at slideshow and am going to send it to my family
Paul
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Post by contrarymary on Nov 5, 2013 22:05:47 GMT
good isn't it?! you never know when you're going to fall across the really well-said things that ring bells.... and there's a current thread on here of "hints and tips" where you may find some helpful ideas too... and there is no such thing as a stupid question or a unique symptom - dive in and be at home. contrary m
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Post by Kathymel on Nov 5, 2013 22:49:30 GMT
Yep, I like that, Mary. Thanks for posting it.
Hit home a few times. So nice when someone else describes things clearly.
I think I shall keep that one.
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magicjo
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Post by magicjo on Nov 6, 2013 10:22:50 GMT
Hello all and hi Paul, I too have just been diagnosed ADHD and am in my forties. I too did ok at school - did everything at the last minute - and got to uni where things became awful and I have felt out of control ever since. I heard a radio 4 programme where an adult woman described her symptoms and I thought ' that's me' and when she eventually said she had ADHD I was a bit taken aback. But i have now had a formal diagnosis and I feel like so much has fallen into place. It's like i was looking at my life upside down until now and not understanding why it wasn't making sense. It has been such a relief to finally know this is what it is, but now I have to pick up the pieces and see where I go from here.
On the surface i am successful with a good job and a lovely family, underneath I am a mess - totally disorganised and have struggled with everything from relationships (there have been many) to taking 10 times as long as others to 'get' things, interrupting people all the time, fidgeting and struggling with hearing and understanding conversations. i have recently started on Concerta and it is great (feels like someone has cleaned the windows!), but i have had to take time off work this year from stress and anxiety due to having reached the tipping point of ever increasing work load, chaotic home life and kids having problems at school. I think my partner and kids probably also have ADHD (my partner's brother was diagnosed as a child) and I am just phasing back into work at the moment, which is hard as I feel people will laugh at me if I tell them I have ADHD and think I am making excuses. it feels so hard to know why I am the way I am and that I am doing something about it and yet not be able to tell anyone for fear of ridicule. I feel pretty isolated and alone, don't know any adults with this - BUT- I am off to my first support group meeting tomorrow - 50 miles away!
underneath I feel that things can only get better, and due to my tenacity I am sure I will get to a better place. Right now, having got over the euphoria of the diagnosis I am a bit overwhelmed by how far I may have to go to get there! Has anyone else struggles with work issues and colleagues and turned things around? Some of me is beginning to wonder whether I should just quit and do something I don;t have to be organised for or sitting in meetings where I struggle to understand all the management gobbledegook!
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Post by Kathymel on Nov 6, 2013 10:41:01 GMT
Hi Magicjo. Don't have time to make a proper reply but just wanted to say welcome!
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paul
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Post by paul on Nov 6, 2013 22:34:13 GMT
Hi Magicjo
I had what I suppose you could call a breakdown in early 2005 - like you I was successful , high profile and a rising " star" - outside I was confident, assertive, everything that was expected of me - it's a persona that I developed from an early age - I call it Alice ( After Alice Cooper ) - but like you I was a mess - completely disorganised I left everything till last minute - crisis management 24/7 - in the end I couldn't take it. I was off work for 5 months but did go back and continued to rise for another 5 years till I left to do what I wanted to do.
You can return, you may find it easier now you know what you have to deal with - I didn't - you will need to adjust how you work but I'm sure it can be done
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Post by contrarymary on Nov 6, 2013 23:12:13 GMT
hi magicjo welcome! a lot of what you said rings bells with me too. well done on getting diagnosed. and well done again on finding a support group - good luck tomorrow evening!! i hope it is everything you hope for. contrary mary
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Post by jacksplatt on Nov 14, 2013 21:57:06 GMT
Hi guys, I was diagnosed a few years ago with ADHD and have been taking Stratterra ever since. I've got 3 children who all have Aspergers/ASD and 2 also have ADHD and I'm STRESSED! I'm having a particularly bad day today and need to talk to people who may just understand how my crazy brain works! It's always a battle being a Mum to kids but flipping hard when you have to constantly fight the very people paid to help them. Ie education etc. The thing is, my brain works so fast I've gone through every scenario they may throw at me whilst fighting for the right education for my kids and in my head I have solved every problem but I just can't process all this information and I'm becoming so stressed out, feeling a bit down and a bit paranoid. I know logically what's going on but emotionally I just can't process it all.
Any ideas for some brain calming techniques would be gratefully received!!
I've never met another adult with ADHD so I'm glad I found you!!
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Post by contrarymary on Nov 14, 2013 22:25:47 GMT
hello jacksplatt and welcome to the forum there are other people around with kids of school age, some of whom are asd and/or adhd - hopefully someone will be along but you may wish to post something in the parent folder too... for calming brains, some of us have been trying mindfulness recently... we were trying to follow a book which was written for people with adhd, tho i have to say it wasn't as easy as doing a course might have been. mindfulness threadand a thing i have been doing which started just this week and i have found RIDICULOUSLY calming is a free 21 day online meditation course, takes 20 mins a day.... i have found it to be unbelievably, amazingly calming. no idea why. but it is. it's at online meditationi hope something helps - 3 NT kids would be hard enough for a NT parent, 3 kids with additional needs for an adhd parent must be.... actually, i can't imagine what it feels like well done for finding the forum and i really hope something helps contrarymary
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Post by JJ on Nov 14, 2013 22:32:10 GMT
Hi jacksplatt and welcome to the forum I feel for you with your brain having overload - it's so stressful trying to fight for your children and so much more so when you've got adhd yourself. How old are your children? Xx
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Post by jacksplatt on Nov 14, 2013 23:02:56 GMT
Thanks for your replies, I'll look into those ideas for claiming. I've always loved meditation but never put time aside to do it when I need to... Like now!! I will promise myself now that I will do some me time things this weekend.
My kids are 8, 15 and 18. We've been doing the education battling for years now. The LEA know we don't go away quietly and when they try and convince me of things I know would be harmful to my kids my mind changes into battle mode! I need to think clearly and try to preempt their next move etc it's just so hard and it kicks off my brain into overdrive and paranoia. It's hard also knowing what it feels like to be misunderstood and to feel different from everyone else in school so that makes it harder when I see them struggle.
We've taken the LEA to the high court and 4 tribunals so far and I don't look at them as being more able or even capable of doing things properly but it's exhausting! I just long for the day I can just be a Mum and can control my brain a bit better. A little less to think about maybe a good start! Along with some relaxing meditation!
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Nov 15, 2013 9:43:26 GMT
I've never met another adult with ADHD so I'm glad I found you!! Go to a support group, they're stuffed full of ADHDers.
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Post by .... on Dec 1, 2013 1:05:06 GMT
Hello, nice to meet you all. I have not been on here for a very long time, so think reintroduction probably warranted : )
Very tired mother of; a 15 yr old, a 14 yr old ADHD'r Diagnosed/Query ASD with sleep problems, and our recent addition, aged 10mnths. Not been able to talk about ADHD for a bit (too stressed). Been trying to pretend to be a normalton. Isn't really working out too well though.
Nice to see many people are still about on here, and that there are new people finding their way here too x
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Post by fuzzywuzzy on Dec 1, 2013 1:18:12 GMT
Hi chrysallis, just a very quick hi.... And welcome back I'm off to attempt sleep.....hopefully 3rd time lucky X
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Post by .... on Dec 1, 2013 14:06:05 GMT
Hi Fuzzywuzzy, Thank you for the welcome x Hope you got some sleep : ) I am experimenting with 2 sleeps a night & a break in the middle for wandering.
Have decided better 'broken sleep' than 'no sleep'. x
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Post by Camkai on Dec 2, 2013 23:20:18 GMT
Hello, I am new to the forum. I know I have ADHD so do my family but I am concerned about going to my GP and being laughed at. My son has it and is in the process of being diagnosed. Did any of you just go straight to a psychologist privately and if so, do you have any recommendations? Also does anyone know what the diagnosis means for someone that works within the medical sector, would it affect employment etc?
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Post by fuzzywuzzy on Dec 2, 2013 23:45:28 GMT
Hi Camkai and welcome My 9 year old was diagnosed this year.....it was what made me and my family realise I had it too....took 3 years for penny to drop though My GP didn't laugh but he was disbelieving......but he was forced to refer because I had already had some idiot not qualified to diagnose me state categorically that I didn't have it, so that meant I could demand 2nd opinion....also went armed with lots of proof as ammo......currently being assessed by Maudsley.... if it doesn't end in diagnosis or meds.....I will be following a friend of mine down the private assessment path....her son also has it and she was quite promptly diagnosed and given meds by her GP, having checked in advance that he would honour any recommendations....it cost her £350 good luck.....be bold.....you have two brilliant pieces of evidence in the form of your son and the beliefs of your family x
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Dec 4, 2013 13:24:37 GMT
Hello, I am new to the forum. I know I have ADHD so do my family but I am concerned about going to my GP and being laughed at. My son has it and is in the process of being diagnosed. Did any of you just go straight to a psychologist privately and if so, do you have any recommendations? Also does anyone know what the diagnosis means for someone that works within the medical sector, would it affect employment etc? A natural reaction which can be very daunting. Sometimes it helps me to imagine the worst possible outcome in life, the absolute worst, imagine it happening, properly visualise it and then re-consider whatever I was worried about before.
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Post by lenarmstrong on Feb 23, 2014 11:27:16 GMT
Morning all just found this forum and looking forward to using it I'm 54 diagnosed at 52 and I'm a shell of the man I was living in a box that I thought no one else lived in I am now learning that the I was put in that box and buried so no one had to deal with me I'm on anti depressants and ritalin(concerta) I get by in that I'm still alive but I'm left unable to fill even the smallest of tasks and end up just allowing myself to hper-focus on the things I can until the next thing comes along I have a beautiful and understanding wife who suffers daily bring up 5 kids including me my eldest son is 20 ADHD and has huge social problems and has been caught up in the drug culture since he was 14 the year he was finally diagnosed after a12 year fight an 18 year old who resents us because he can't understand and twin 10 year old girls both of which show signs of spectrum disorders. My wife had a fall recently which left her with spinal chord damage in her neck leaving her permanently disabled and all sorts of complications for her and Knock on effects for usus still the government seem happy to let society to judge us as scroungers and I'm not convinced that they don't actively promote to there own ends anyhow I look forward to being a helpful member I am willing to share anything of my life I have no secrets unexposed so if anyone wants to talk I won't judge cos there's not a lot will surprise me about the behaviour of someone who has lived this life of ours BTW at the moment (cos I'm always trying to learn) I don't have disease or deficiency I just have never had an accepted place In which to live and be listened to thanks for reading the longest letter I've written in decades
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Feb 23, 2014 11:37:34 GMT
Welcome
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mc1250
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Post by mc1250 on Mar 2, 2014 17:58:14 GMT
Hi All
I recently discovered I may have ADHD (i'm pretty sure i have but waiting to be assessed formally).
I have so much to say and explain i don't know where to start!!
Anyway does anyone undiagnosed/diagnosed self medicate to help with the symptoms?
The reason i ask is because i've been using speed to self medicate for the last couple of weeks and yes i know it's stupid and dangerous but finally having a clear head (sometimes) outweighs the risks right now.
SO does anyone else do this and what with?
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 4, 2014 8:19:37 GMT
Welcome mc1250. You might be better off starting your own thread to get answers from people who may have self-medicated the way you say you do now.
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Post by Vasilis Tzikas on Mar 12, 2014 14:58:33 GMT
Dear All, The Research House is conducting a nationwide study on ADHD. In particular, we are looking to set up face-to-face interviews with London-based ADHD patients on Wednesday 19th March or Wednesday 26th March and, as a token of appreciation, we offer incentives ranging from £95 -£110. We are looking for adult patients who were diagnosed as adults and are taking Strattera or parents of ADHD patients who are currently taking Strattera. The interview will take place at a location of your choice and will take 1 hour. The purpose of the interview is to test an interactive online tool (website) designed for patients with ADHD. You will be required to use your personal computer/notebook/tablet for testing this tool. If you think you may be able to assist us with our study, please call me directly on 0207 487 9188. If you know any patients and/or parents of patients who meet our criteria I would be grateful if you forwarded them my details (see below). We guarantee that the study you may be involved in will comply with all the relevant data protection and privacy laws and with the European Pharmaceutical Market Research Organisation’s Code of Conduct. The highest standards of professional conduct will be upheld in the collection and the recording of any information you provide. You will remain anonymous and your responses will always be treated as confidential at all times. No one will attempt to sell or promote any products during or following your participation in this research. I’m looking forward to hearing from you. Kind regards, Vasilis Tzikas | Projects Coordinator The Research House, A Schlesinger Associates Company 124 Wigmore Street London, W1U 3RY (D) 44 (0) 20 7487 9188 (T) 44 (0) 20 7935 4979 (F) 44 (0) 20 7224 2494 recruitment@research-house.co.uk | www.research-house.co.uk
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