vikki27
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Post by vikki27 on Jun 30, 2019 21:36:10 GMT
I was wondering if anyone has any tips for getting me to stick to things??
Whenever I discover a new hobby/interest/whatever, I am 100% sure that's THE hobby/interest for me. I will devote my life to it. I will become SUCH a pro that people will look to me for guidance. Then I lose interest within a couple of months. I won't bore you with the litany of things I've attempted (and failed) to stick at, because I'm sure you've all had similar experiences. But the thing is, it'c costing a fortune and I'm getting NOWHERE. I want to be good at something, no, GREAT at something. I want to have a skill or a talent or something I can be proficient in, but I'll never get there if I can't make myself stick to something!!!!
It doesn't help that I have a twin sister who is a very talented artist and seamstress. She's made paintings for people, she sews clothes and costumes for her daughter, she makes hoodies for her husband...and I'm over here with no ability to do anything. I mean, really, nothing.
So how can I make myself stick to something!?!?!
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 1, 2019 14:52:40 GMT
Glue 😎
I'm the same the only things I have stuck at are video games and my job plastering. The thing that I think drives me in the plastering is the thought of someone not paying me because my works not up to scratch so I make damn sure it is. Not driven by money if I don't like the job or customer I won't do it 😄.
I think you should let us know what you started and didn't finish/got bored off. My last one for me was magnet fishing lol see it on you tube then brought a magnet for 50quid......didn't last long.
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vikki27
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Post by vikki27 on Jul 1, 2019 16:07:07 GMT
I've never heard of magnet fishing!
Oh God, I'll never remember all of it but here goes...
knitting (no cost to me but took half my Gran's wool and some of her needles. Knitted a scarf. Lost interest) sewing (£300 on sewing machine. Used 3 times) needlefelting (don't even ask) pottery (2 months of classes) scrapbooking (LOADS of crafting stuff, big fancy scrapbook, Scrapbooking for Dummies) boxfit (bought boxing gloves and pads for that and only went for a couple of months) Calligraphy (2 calligraphy sets, one of which was a very expensive set with glass pen and 3 fancy inks) Pyrography (got the full beginner's set. Made one coaster) Set up my own baking business...lasted a year. Got bored. Upcycling. Got a bunch of second hand furniture and various materials. Never finished a single item. Photography (don't ask) Writing (still pursuing. Cost unknown. Not going ANYWHERE) Yoga - bought the mat. Love the mat. Did it religiously for about a year. Not done any in months. Eliptical machine (same as mat) Medicine balls, kettle bells, skipping rope, etc...thought I'd be one of those fitness guru types. For outcome, see yoga. Card making (same as scrapbooking. I now have 3 full large boxes of such craft materials, largely unused) Badminton (racquets, shuttlecocks. Used handful of times) Tennis (same as badminton)
That's all I can remember off the top of my head. I've been like this my WHOLE life. My parents used to get so angry with me because I would fall passionately in love with a hobby of some kind, and then drop it and never look back because I was onto something else. And I've never been able to explain why. Occasionally I think back on these hobbies and kind of go 'yeah...I should really do some of that again', but I never actually do. And I can't explain why. It's not like I didn't enjoy it or anything like that. I just...meh. It's the same reason I have over 70 unread books. I LOVE reading...but most of the time I buy the book and never get round to reading it. But can't stop myself buying new books. I'm no longer allowed to go into Waterstones unsupervised. My husband has ACTUALLY banned me!!! Hahaha!! I just have no self control. I can go into Waterstones or Boots or Hobbycraft and drop £100 without even blinking and I am NOT a wealthy woman. I just get very excited by new things. Then I casually forget to do anything with them.
It's why I also don't have a proper career. There are so many things I would like to do, but in order to do them you have to REALLY commit. Then I think about doing that one thing for the rest of my life and something inside me just dies at the thought of not doing the others. I'm now doing an online course in graphic design. Who knows? Maybe this will be it.
Urgh.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 1, 2019 16:45:24 GMT
So all your attempts where eithe exercise or crafts. Not sure if that significant but may be something to think about.
Not a fan of book shops or books or reading lol I failed miserably at English but that God damn middle of lidl gets me every time the shit I have brought out there 🤑 most the time I don't even get the food I went in for and Amazon holy shit I have eased off now but I was getting parcels everyday lol.
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Post by jp on Jul 1, 2019 20:49:12 GMT
Wish I knew the answer.
I’ve done sooooo many jobs:
landscaping, underwear design, set building, sewage treatment systems, carpentry, cameraman, teaching CAD, property renovations, teaching at a nursery in DRCongo, building an eco hotel in India, lecturing in Architecture, packing coffee, setting up various community projects, model making, running a festival, special effects in film, teaching bushcraft, labouring, garden maintenance, teaching workshop skills, music video production, decorating, plumbing, art direction and production design, installing rainwater systems in Bolivia, renovating and selling vintage stuff, establishing a charity, sound design recording and foley, et al......
I did really well in my unfinished Psychology BSc and always got top marks in my unfinished Masters in Energy Studies.
Then there’s the hobbies!!!!
Jeeze
Some of these things I’ve got pretty good at - I’ve been on £50/hr, I’ve had my work on the front page of international design magazines.
But I get bored.
Or I fuck it up.
And now? I have NOTHING to show for it except some learned skills and low self esteem. No property. Nothing in the bank.
Some tools and books and a crappy car.
Same with relationships. Serial monogamist with two children by two different women. Nothing lasting more than a couple of years.
Can’t stick to anything.
Woody Allen said “99% of success is just turning up.”
As a hunter gatherer I’d be awesome.
Or working in company that values divergent thinking. But it would have to be on interesting and diverse projects or I’d get bored of that too.
As I said I wish I knew the answer. Meds help get through the day - but don’t make any impact really on the bigger issues like persistence.
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vikki27
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Post by vikki27 on Jul 1, 2019 21:08:09 GMT
Haha, yeah, I know what you mean. Lidl is a trap!! I have VERY strict rules about shopping online or I can get lost very quickly. I don't have it saved to my phone or laptop and if I go on, I can ONLY look for a specific item. Once the item is bought, I have to close it.
But really, my main weakness is anything crafty and anything sporty. And make up. I'm AWFUL for impulse buying make up and nail varnishes. At one point I had nearly 100 nail varnishes. I had to buy a separate plastic box for all my lipsticks. And the truth is, I don't often wear any of it. I just love the pretty colours. It's so embarrassing. As for the particular impulse areas, I'm not entirely sure what to think about it. Maybe you're right and it means something...I think it's probably just that I love the idea of being that sporty and fit, and the idea of making all these lovely things. But when it comes down to it, there's always something new to try and I lose interest. I can't even just do one job. Currently, I work in a shop 3 days a week, I run social media for a local charity, I present radio for a local hospital charity and I help a friend run pub quizzes. I'm constantly on the go as a result but I find it difficult to put any of it down because I feel like I'm going crazy if I'm not occupied. Even though I feel like I'm going crazy with too much to do. Lose/lose!!
How do you handle your impulses?
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 1, 2019 21:44:27 GMT
Haha, yeah, I know what you mean. Lidl is a trap!! I have VERY strict rules about shopping online or I can get lost very quickly. I don't have it saved to my phone or laptop and if I go on, I can ONLY look for a specific item. Once the item is bought, I have to close it. But really, my main weakness is anything crafty and anything sporty. And make up. I'm AWFUL for impulse buying make up and nail varnishes. At one point I had nearly 100 nail varnishes. I had to buy a separate plastic box for all my lipsticks. And the truth is, I don't often wear any of it. I just love the pretty colours. It's so embarrassing. As for the particular impulse areas, I'm not entirely sure what to think about it. Maybe you're right and it means something...I think it's probably just that I love the idea of being that sporty and fit, and the idea of making all these lovely things. But when it comes down to it, there's always something new to try and I lose interest. I can't even just do one job. Currently, I work in a shop 3 days a week, I run social media for a local charity, I present radio for a local hospital charity and I help a friend run pub quizzes. I'm constantly on the go as a result but I find it difficult to put any of it down because I feel like I'm going crazy if I'm not occupied. Even though I feel like I'm going crazy with too much to do. Lose/lose!! How do you handle your impulses? I don't 👍
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Post by jp on Jul 2, 2019 9:14:34 GMT
I don’t handle them well either!
There’s different kinds of impulse and often some anxiety trumps the impulse.
I leaned not to own a credit card some decades back. And mostly I’m too poor to impulse buy. I have to be very careful when I do earn a lump. But since I never know how much money I have until my cash card is declined, and I always assume I’m nearly at that point, I’m pretty frugal.
Sometimes I can put adhd between me and an impulse.
For example if I buy weed or hashish I smoke it until it’s gone. First thing in the morning to last thing at night. An eighth goes in two days . Can’t moderate at all. Would love to be able to put it in the cupboard with the brandy and have a joint on a Sunday afternoon.
Thankfully, very thankfully, alcohol hasn’t grabbed me.
When I don’t have it it’s ‘out of sight out of mind’ (not sure if that’s adhd or asd but it’s a thing) Except for when I do want it...! Fortunately the fact I’ll have to make phone calls and arrange times and locations and get there with the correct amount of money etc... (Haha) means I don’t buy it. — I love getting stoned. It’s always been my goto self-med. I can be very focussed and productive on it. But being permanently monged becomes counterproductive. It’s a fine line that I can’t walk.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 2, 2019 9:32:54 GMT
Yeah sticking to drugs is easy 🤣 not recommended tho lol. My meds have killed my taste for getting stoned though. So just for bedtime now.
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Post by jp on Jul 2, 2019 12:04:32 GMT
Can I ask what meds you are on?
I only smoke once in a while these days - kinda like a two day holiday from my normal headspace. And yes maybe that reduced ‘need’ is the MPH.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 2, 2019 14:25:52 GMT
Can I ask what meds you are on? I only smoke once in a while these days - kinda like a two day holiday from my normal headspace. And yes maybe that reduced ‘need’ is the MPH. That generic ritalin 80mgs
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