Serious help / advise please!!! - work related.
Dec 4, 2021 15:40:20 GMT
via mobile
quarenqueen likes this
Post by quarenqueen on Dec 4, 2021 15:40:20 GMT
Pre warning- I’m so sorry for this utter shambles of a post.
Hi guys! This is the first time I’ve posted here, and I’ve been v nervous to post. But I really really need some help!!
The bit I’m finding the hardest is I feel like everyone is against me (I know, I sound so personality disorder!!)
Bust seriously, my head is chaos, I’m doubting everting I think is right…
Any advice would be sososososo amazing
I started my job almost a year ago. my probationary period had been extended up until today. However, from day 1 I have been faced with challenges after challenges. I was diagnosed with Dyslexia when I was at school, and I have learnt many coping strategies. However, these were ripped apart, along with my confidence. I had supervision at least once a week, where i was constantly criticised. there were 2 occasions 2 different supervisors even questioned if this was the career for me and suggested I change it. However, my line manager did really seem to understand and want to help me remove the barriers so I could succeed. he sign posted me to access to work where I applied for more help.
As i continued to struggle and could not work out why, I decided to see a private psychiatrist, who diagnosed me with ADHD. it was also around this point that my line manager went on a sabbatical, and one of the other supervisors stepped in. looking back on it now, it is very clear this was the point where everything started to go very down hill.
Before my line manager left, we had started to work together to create a realistic and fair improvement plan. As the plan was not finished before the new supervisor stepped in, he completely misunderstood it, as well as me and my disabilities.
I think as he was in a new team leader role, he probably wanted to tick all the boxes, meaning I wasn't able to express the barriers he was actively putting in place, that were stopping me from succeeding.
I constantly felt criticised, almost like I was in trouble at school, excluded from the team and just not supported in any way. This lead to a big breakdown in the work relationship, just being in the office / work environment was so uncomfortable for me, it felt so hostile, intimidating and embarassing,.
So at this point my levels of stress are literally through the roof.. When I get stressed I experience severe migraines, when I get one I loose 75% of my vision (aura), physically sick (vomit) and in agonising pain where the only fractional release comes from sitting in a dark room. Until this point I had not experienced migraines since school.
This because a very vicious cycle where the stress actively being put on me, exacerbated by my ADHD and dyslexia, was physically making me unwell - and then as I was unwell I was getting in more trouble and stress at work, going round and round.
it is important to mention throughout almost all of this time - 9 months in this post, I did receive any reasonable adjustments or support of any kind. My employer argued in my final probation meeting they had made adjustments - in the form of a couple sheets of green paper.
It was not until the week of my final probation meeting that I finally received the reccomendations from access to work.
During this meeting I was slated - it was clear the supervisor stepping in as manager had instantly made the assumption I was not able to do this role - this wasn’t a nice feeling, especially when you know yourself that this is the one thing your good at, and then your basically being called thick.
For this meeting I sought advise and support from the unison - initially, they filled me with hope, but the faded away when my unison rep decided that I wouldn’t get through this final meeting, and I should expect to be fired. It is so unbelievably stressful in situations like this, I had no understanding of policies or like the processes for things like this for even the equality act. I felt horrible - I felt I was being discriminated against. I couldn’t work out how the challenges I was facing was acceptable within the equality act.
Dyslexic coach was provided by A2W but I was never able to take full advantage of this as everything was so up in the air when I finally received the sessions.
Line manager returned
Nevertheless, the hearing panel decided to extend my probation by a additional 8 weeks, and set of expectations / reqiuiments for me to meet in that time. The main one being amount of sick days I take.
ADHD MEDS - Lisdexamfetamine - 2 months ish
So here we are…. the panel decided to dismiss me due to my capability. However, I had demonstrated a clear improvement in my work and the requirements they set. BUTTT, during this 8 week peiopd I had experienced a migraine 2 more times then I was allowed. During this period there have been many mitigating factors for me - my mum hospitalised (she was diagnosed with cancer back in AUG), as well as my uncle being diagnosed with pancreatic, liver and bone cancer. And in the space of a month, I was in 2 car accidents.
I wanted to explain that despite the crazy level of stress I had been in over the last 8 weeks, I was making every single effort I could to prove myself. I was working myself in to the ground, trying not to get a migraine, be there for my family and clearly demonstrate my ability at work (working my self to the ground, to overcome obstacles that seemed to be hiding my ability from my managers).
My unison representative did attend this meeting, but he did not support me or represent me in any sort of way. The only time he spoke it was as if he was arguing against me - speaking to my line manager after the meeting he noted he saw the same. I asked for support prior to this hearing, but received a very dismissive email back basically saying there was nothing I can do. At the end his only comments were, think about what you want to do, ok to work in Tesco in the mean time, as I was on probation I dont have any rights.
What baffles me is how the consequences of my disability (in terms of the obstacles purposely put in my way AND that linking to sickness, especially as I am much more susceptible to stress - leading to sickness) was not considered. This puts me at much more of a disadvantage compared to my collegues
The stress put on me and more susceptible too trigged the sickness absence was something arising from a disability.
Many people with ADHD struggle to obtain the reasonable adjustments that they need to do well in their work role. In many cases they do not pursue reasonable adjustments at all thus struggle when expected to complete the same amount of work, in the same time, to the same standard as their peers who do not have ADHD or other impairments. Those people who do not receive support at work are not only disadvantaged at work, but this feeds into their ability to manage their ADHD outside of work.
WHAT DO I DO NOW?!?!
I know going back to this job is not an option but should I fight it?
I’m sorry this will probably make no sense ahah
Hi guys! This is the first time I’ve posted here, and I’ve been v nervous to post. But I really really need some help!!
The bit I’m finding the hardest is I feel like everyone is against me (I know, I sound so personality disorder!!)
Bust seriously, my head is chaos, I’m doubting everting I think is right…
Any advice would be sososososo amazing
I started my job almost a year ago. my probationary period had been extended up until today. However, from day 1 I have been faced with challenges after challenges. I was diagnosed with Dyslexia when I was at school, and I have learnt many coping strategies. However, these were ripped apart, along with my confidence. I had supervision at least once a week, where i was constantly criticised. there were 2 occasions 2 different supervisors even questioned if this was the career for me and suggested I change it. However, my line manager did really seem to understand and want to help me remove the barriers so I could succeed. he sign posted me to access to work where I applied for more help.
As i continued to struggle and could not work out why, I decided to see a private psychiatrist, who diagnosed me with ADHD. it was also around this point that my line manager went on a sabbatical, and one of the other supervisors stepped in. looking back on it now, it is very clear this was the point where everything started to go very down hill.
Before my line manager left, we had started to work together to create a realistic and fair improvement plan. As the plan was not finished before the new supervisor stepped in, he completely misunderstood it, as well as me and my disabilities.
I think as he was in a new team leader role, he probably wanted to tick all the boxes, meaning I wasn't able to express the barriers he was actively putting in place, that were stopping me from succeeding.
I constantly felt criticised, almost like I was in trouble at school, excluded from the team and just not supported in any way. This lead to a big breakdown in the work relationship, just being in the office / work environment was so uncomfortable for me, it felt so hostile, intimidating and embarassing,.
So at this point my levels of stress are literally through the roof.. When I get stressed I experience severe migraines, when I get one I loose 75% of my vision (aura), physically sick (vomit) and in agonising pain where the only fractional release comes from sitting in a dark room. Until this point I had not experienced migraines since school.
This because a very vicious cycle where the stress actively being put on me, exacerbated by my ADHD and dyslexia, was physically making me unwell - and then as I was unwell I was getting in more trouble and stress at work, going round and round.
it is important to mention throughout almost all of this time - 9 months in this post, I did receive any reasonable adjustments or support of any kind. My employer argued in my final probation meeting they had made adjustments - in the form of a couple sheets of green paper.
It was not until the week of my final probation meeting that I finally received the reccomendations from access to work.
During this meeting I was slated - it was clear the supervisor stepping in as manager had instantly made the assumption I was not able to do this role - this wasn’t a nice feeling, especially when you know yourself that this is the one thing your good at, and then your basically being called thick.
For this meeting I sought advise and support from the unison - initially, they filled me with hope, but the faded away when my unison rep decided that I wouldn’t get through this final meeting, and I should expect to be fired. It is so unbelievably stressful in situations like this, I had no understanding of policies or like the processes for things like this for even the equality act. I felt horrible - I felt I was being discriminated against. I couldn’t work out how the challenges I was facing was acceptable within the equality act.
Dyslexic coach was provided by A2W but I was never able to take full advantage of this as everything was so up in the air when I finally received the sessions.
Line manager returned
Nevertheless, the hearing panel decided to extend my probation by a additional 8 weeks, and set of expectations / reqiuiments for me to meet in that time. The main one being amount of sick days I take.
ADHD MEDS - Lisdexamfetamine - 2 months ish
So here we are…. the panel decided to dismiss me due to my capability. However, I had demonstrated a clear improvement in my work and the requirements they set. BUTTT, during this 8 week peiopd I had experienced a migraine 2 more times then I was allowed. During this period there have been many mitigating factors for me - my mum hospitalised (she was diagnosed with cancer back in AUG), as well as my uncle being diagnosed with pancreatic, liver and bone cancer. And in the space of a month, I was in 2 car accidents.
I wanted to explain that despite the crazy level of stress I had been in over the last 8 weeks, I was making every single effort I could to prove myself. I was working myself in to the ground, trying not to get a migraine, be there for my family and clearly demonstrate my ability at work (working my self to the ground, to overcome obstacles that seemed to be hiding my ability from my managers).
My unison representative did attend this meeting, but he did not support me or represent me in any sort of way. The only time he spoke it was as if he was arguing against me - speaking to my line manager after the meeting he noted he saw the same. I asked for support prior to this hearing, but received a very dismissive email back basically saying there was nothing I can do. At the end his only comments were, think about what you want to do, ok to work in Tesco in the mean time, as I was on probation I dont have any rights.
What baffles me is how the consequences of my disability (in terms of the obstacles purposely put in my way AND that linking to sickness, especially as I am much more susceptible to stress - leading to sickness) was not considered. This puts me at much more of a disadvantage compared to my collegues
The stress put on me and more susceptible too trigged the sickness absence was something arising from a disability.
Many people with ADHD struggle to obtain the reasonable adjustments that they need to do well in their work role. In many cases they do not pursue reasonable adjustments at all thus struggle when expected to complete the same amount of work, in the same time, to the same standard as their peers who do not have ADHD or other impairments. Those people who do not receive support at work are not only disadvantaged at work, but this feeds into their ability to manage their ADHD outside of work.
WHAT DO I DO NOW?!?!
I know going back to this job is not an option but should I fight it?
I’m sorry this will probably make no sense ahah