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Post by Deleted on Jan 29, 2009 21:56:48 GMT
My throat hurts. Ive just completely lost it with my daughter. My 7 year old daughter. The school had suspected that she may have ADHD, but after she was seen by a school psychologist, they decided against it. This is what led me to look into ADHD for adults and that was me, when I went to see the GP about my daughter he said he would eat his hat if she had ADHD, so I haven't bothered going to him about me (I don't really want him to eat his hat). I love my daughter to bits, she funny, smart, sassy but she is difficult at times. Thats not her fault, its mine, I can't deal with them. To everyone else, I'm this scatty lazy chilled out person, but to her I'm a mad screaming woman. Why when I can understand her the most, what shes going through, Do I tell her off for them? I don't understand my behavior towards her, I'm so protective of her, don't allow anyone to say anything against her behavior but at the same time I tell her off for her behavior. I want this cycle to end of her doing something and me shouting to end. I fear I can't change and neither can she.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 29, 2009 22:18:14 GMT
I completely feel yr frustration and I'm afraid I do believe Dr's as unsympathetic as that shud be struck off (actually i think they shud be shot, but that seems extreme) I have had a string of to excuse my french but bastard doctors who have not only bin useless but reduced me to tears by their stuck up know it attitude and believe you me even if it means movin dsoctors havin a sympathetic one is key, also look into the services the school offers such as CHAM's, because she needs to be assessed by qualified mental health workers and as an ADDer living in charge of 3 ADDer's (althou hardly ever in charge) I know exactly what you feeling, the amount of times I've lost it screamed my head off then cried, even considered giving them up coz normal foster parents are better than a useless person like me, who has never actually ever grown up. Trust me when I say, the relationship you will have with your daughter will be special, my daughters really keep me going and we laugh about our blond moments (of which their are many) yr title is wish i was supermum, sadly i wisah i was jus normal mum. I gurantee you your daughter wud swap you for no one else, I bet her friends mums are boring and becoz of the ADD, yr relationship is far closer than those beige folk we all seem to envy so much Stick to your boundaries and no one has a right to say anything negative about her or her behaviour except you, maybe you shud ask about parenting classes (this sounds like faultin yr parentin, but i found it helpful ) jus to set structure and boundaries and have other parents to bounce ideas off if that makes sense. I have spent many hours wondering why I can't get it right and have learned the best thing to do is focus on the posative sides of my relationship with my kids, ike my daughter telling me all her friends wish i was their mum coz their mums are boring' which is good but then i emind her that most mums have clean house and clean clothes and tea on table at 6 pm every day, she says 'yeah, but i dont care I'd rather have you than anything' that makes it worth while and I'm sure one day yr daughter will say the same, it is obvious you love her and that will shine through, I have actually spent mst of this month feeling like ive seriously failed all my kids but one day theyl know it was my lack of skills not my lack of effort and im sure one day yr daughter will feel the same, but it is important you try and get rofessionals in and like i said go to yr doctors surgery and see another doctor if they dont have one go to a different doctor and ask for a second opinion, but talk to her teacher about any help they can offer you, express yr concerns, you can refer yrself to social services you know just walk iinto any office and ask for help good luck wiv everything and keep us posted parentin is the hardest most unappriciated job in the world but ultimately the mnost rewarding so take care XXXX
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Post by Deleted on Jan 29, 2009 22:34:00 GMT
PS wait til she hits puberty and yr both coming on at the same time, theres 3 of us here doing that!!! So we pre menstral and ADHD, all 3 scatty, all 3 chilled unless provoked, wen my daughters fight they draw blood, last weekend I spent friday night in casualty wondering what it must be like to be normal, oh how wonderful to not spend my life screaming 'WILL YOU TWO PACK IT IN' (thas the censored version ) Don't be too hard on yrself yr managing as best you can against enormous odds keep yr chin up as time passes and u learn more it'll get easier to cope wiv, yl develope all these coping mechanisms and yl have this gr8 vivacious intelligent, talented daughter who will love you like no other and have you ever thought you clash becoz yr so alike? take it easier oh and sorry for the spellin miustakes in above post XXX
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