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Post by thinkaholic on Jun 9, 2016 16:13:04 GMT
It sucks to be single. For life, I fear. My only dream as a teenager was to have somebody to share everything with. I'm turning 50. Later more. I'm wondering if I'm the only man here who knows what it is to be so lonely for so long.
So lonely, I feel so low, I feel low ...
Would Sting really have felt this way? I hope so, because it would be easier if ...
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Post by vagueandrandom on Jun 9, 2016 19:01:49 GMT
Me too thinkaholicNearly 50, still single, no kids, no job. . really could do with a PA. . Today I'm not lonely, but I do get very lonely, so can understand.
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Post by easilydistracted on Jun 9, 2016 20:12:01 GMT
No, you are not the only one.
And I know my fate
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Post by easilydistracted on Jun 9, 2016 21:49:25 GMT
Hi dude,
longer version...
No, you are not the only one, not by a long shot, I think there are quite a few of us here.
Muddling through from day to day, maybe tomorrow will be better.
Maybe tomorrow the world will be different, never quite giving up hope.
Somewhere out there, there's someone whose screw-ups are compatible with mine and mine with theirs, somewhere.
And it's that little bit of hope, somewhere.
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Post by thinkaholic on Jun 10, 2016 5:08:00 GMT
I'm "glad" that I'm not the only lonely batchelor. Misery loves company ... Iit has a selfish side, but it is "necessary" not to feel the only loser "in town". People usually compare themselves with their peers, and nobody wants to be the ugliest, or dumbest or whatever person in the group. Keeping up with the Joneses ... You can maybe guess what I'm to do. www.huffingtonpost.com/mary-pritchard/keeping-up-with-the-joneses_b_2467957.html"As it turns out, the phrase “Keeping up with the Joneses” comes from a cartoon strip of that name that launched in 1913 and ran for 26 years. In the strip, creator “Pop” Momand poked fun at our need to do things in order to impress other people. I’d love to say that need died when the last episode of that comic strip ran, but alas, it seems to have only gotten worse. These days we don’t care about the Joneses, we’re trying to keep up with the Kardashians. (Thank God I don’t have cable TV!) " I guess you didn't know that either. Quite refreshing, maybe even risky. In the recent BBC program How to find love on line the presenter, Dr. Van Tulleken said he was getting fed up with being at weddings as the only single. And then he added that some of them are divorced and that gave him solace! What I'm wondering is, will those people - if they watch the program - not be angry at him? Or maybe the contact is not active anymore. i get the feeling,, although I admit that it's not a noble one. As a romantic I want people to stay together, but being frustrated - also partly because of my general opinion about empathy, modesty and sense of justice - I don't like them showing of their happiness. This kind of sharing is not meant as a gift. I'd like to think differently about knowledge. OK, it's also a way to make you feel superior, but I do want people to get wiser instead of keeping them ignorant. Also I believe that I would not do that. I dislike those who shout from the roof tops about things that are so normal, natural, typical, general, ... that I wonder why that would make them proud. So what if you are alive and turn a certain age. Yes, "your' football team won, and how is that your doing? OK, you had sex 9 months ago and now there's a baby. What an achievement. What a unique moment in the history of mankind. On the other hand I'm impressed if people are open about their problems, especially op TV, so others can learn about them and are encouraged to do the same. I hate taboos, because they lead to suffering - also mine - and backwardness. My dilemma is this: I don't want to show my vulnerability because then people might say negative things about me. And I don't trust most of them: lack of empathy, sensitivity, code of honour, ... On the other side I want to tell the truth. The "right" way to solve the dilemma: avoid talking to people. They don't get me anyway. Ofcourse now I know that I have ADD and can explain it and show websites about it, I stand a chance. But still, practically no feedback.
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Post by easilydistracted on Jun 10, 2016 7:37:21 GMT
That's a mighty big suit of armour you have on ( intellectual arrogance ), especially for one that prefers others to be naked ( admit vulnerabilities ).
Man is a sum of his connections, just ask Adam Smith* for thoughts on that versus standing alone.
Ignoring the whole dog-eating-its-own-faeces aspect of celebrity television there is no malice in happiness, just as a child playing with a toy is not rubbing your face in it by saying 'look how much fun I'm having' nor are a couple walking hand in hand, they are simply lost in the moment and each other. You cannot be bitter or jealous of them for that, a little envious maybe but not jealous and bitter.
I'm not looking for a PA, that's a one sided relationship. I'd like a companion an equal not a slave to do my bidding. Someone who maybe has a few quirks of their own, onea that i can cover rather than exploit and maybe they wil cover mine, someone to make my world whole and I theirs, symbiotic, someone to share each day with, someone to walk hand in hand with and get lost in the moment with.
*or read up on him rather seeing as he is very dead
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Post by vagueandrandom on Jun 10, 2016 11:42:58 GMT
The reason that I said that I need a PA/housekeeper is that, if I could afford it, I would pay someone in a professional capacity.
It would not be a replacement for a friend or companion, but they are much harder to find. .
I'm paraphrasing something I remember that Dr Hallowell said. . something like however often someone
with ADHD fails. . they wake up the next day with hope that things will be better. . .
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Post by marionk on Jun 11, 2016 13:38:01 GMT
Did someone say bachelor? /me puts on sexy voice *Well, helllooo handsome, where have you been hiding?*
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Post by thinkaholic on Jun 11, 2016 14:15:23 GMT
You talking to me? In the case of yes, in my house, skin and country. In the case of no, the same. I have an idea. Another game ...
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Post by marionk on Jun 11, 2016 17:30:52 GMT
/me chirps brightly " Hide and seek?"
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