duckster
Member's posted somewhat
Posts: 97
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Post by duckster on Feb 7, 2017 21:37:26 GMT
Hello everyone, I guess I am here to see if I am the only one that feels like this. Although I was diagnosed last year with innatentive adult ADD I am still working out what is "me" and what is down to the ADD. I have read that people with ADD have low self esteem and I always have. It's like my brain is working against all of the time. I put it down to depression but to be honest I also put it down to ADD. I am sick of not thinking I am good enough, knowing I have got a brain but because of my ADD it means it willl never be utilized. I know it probably sounds dramatic but when you have pursued a career and gone to uni (in my last year) and realise you can't do it no matter how hard you try, it is soul destroying. I have had to quit my job to put my studies first so money worries aren't helpful. I just hate constantly putting myself down, if someone did the same journey as me I would praise them for persevering and carrying on but when it's me there is always something that could have been better. I am certain my brain hates me.
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fardale
Member's not posted much yet
Posts: 37
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Post by fardale on Feb 8, 2017 16:52:51 GMT
Hello everyone, I guess I am here to see if I am the only one that feels like this. Although I was diagnosed last year with innatentive adult ADD I am still working out what is "me" and what is down to the ADD. I have read that people with ADD have low self esteem and I always have. It's like my brain is working against all of the time. I put it down to depression but to be honest I also put it down to ADD. I am sick of not thinking I am good enough, knowing I have got a brain but because of my ADD it means it willl never be utilized. I know it probably sounds dramatic but when you have pursued a career and gone to uni (in my last year) and realise you can't do it no matter how hard you try, it is soul destroying. I have had to quit my job to put my studies first so money worries aren't helpful. I just hate constantly putting myself down, if someone did the same journey as me I would praise them for persevering and carrying on but when it's me there is always something that could have been better. I am certain my brain hates me. the long and short of it is 'depends'. depends on you, your adhd, your depression. everyone's is unique and everyone of us has a unique way of thinking. this doesn't really help you so i'll give you my experience (lucky you eh?) so you can compare. Was bullied at a young age, darting between class clown, several friend groups and hiding in my head apparently alienates you from class mates. at 5-16 who knew eh? so anyway with that and my self criticism my self esteem has been pretty shot for years. Thanks to an adhd brain most of my self loathing has been abated. in fact, i'm now fairly confident in myself, my constant nattering in my head has made me glad to be who i am and i enjoy the things that i do. i've convinced myself that i'm responsible for my own happiness and everyone else can shove it. aaaand then the anxiety kicks in and all that crumbles to pieces. I get shakes when i have to talk to strangers on the phone, i get panicky over whether or not my work is satisfactory, someone shouts at me and for the next 20 minutes i go into a deep hyper self criticism that i forget about shortly afterwords because... ya kno... i got fired from work once for forgetting a bottle of window cleaner in an dementia patients room. poor bloke was bed ridden and needed assistance going to the bathroom but apparently that was irrelevant. i started shaking, sweating and close to tears in the disciplinary, 1 minute after i left i got pissed off because my brain started working again and all the things i should have said to defend myself i didn't. so for me, i'm generally content until any kind of work or social related pressure kicks in :3 everything in that was contradictory i know. but... that's what it is for me lol. hope that helps. it may be completely different with you, esepcially as you get older. this is pretty Saturday cartoon but: life does get easier. as u get older. at least in my opinion
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Post by blaze on Feb 23, 2017 11:05:46 GMT
Ime yes. There are lots of areas in life I have discovered I am much better than others at, but that didn't come until I just gave up trying to catch up to others in areas I can't manage. Stop sweating the small stuff & beating yourself up over uncontrollable stuff then it leaves more room for the things you can excell at
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Post by Fleecemaster on Mar 9, 2017 22:32:45 GMT
I have a similar problem, I went to Uni, and I was doing well until the second year of my PhD, then suddenly no matter how hard I tried I couldn't do anything. I can only describe the feeling as like the bottom of a container breaking and everything just collapsing through it. That was 9 years ago now and I still give myself a lot of grief over it. Now I struggle to even go to the shops without panicking. I think it's as others have said, just focus on what you can do, and accept that there are things that others will be better at. I wish others around me were more understanding and didn't just think I was lazy though, that's usually what gets me down the most. That's probably all in my head too though!
Not sure how much this helps, just giving my experience on it. Do what you can, but accept your limitations, as hard as that is!
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Post by tink on Aug 23, 2017 7:51:46 GMT
You are better than good enough. You're perfectly you. I dreamed of doing certain things when I was younger, but I couldn't do them for whatever reason... Probably cause I "just didn't get it" or couldn't stick at whatever it was. So I stopped chasing what I wasn't going to achieve, as that would have only made me feel like a failure, and I did something else completely different. I succeeded at that, although it doesn't stop other areas of my life from being difficult at times, and I feel on top of the world following my chosen path, most of the time (I have my difficult days). "if at first you don't succeed, try, try and try again - then let it go and try something completely different and new". You are great and special and unique and it's never too late to start something new.
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