sasquatch
Member's not posted much yet
Posts: 19
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Post by sasquatch on May 18, 2017 19:08:13 GMT
Sick of trying to be positive and keep going.
It just seems that when something starts to go right a million things jump in the way to make everything unbearable.
I'm really reaching the point where so many jobs and relationships have failed that maybe i am actually just a bad person everyone would be better without. I can't begin to explain how it feels seeing everything falling down around me and thinking "but I tried!".
It's really to the point where I really just don't see the point anymore. No matter how hard I try I can't seem to get it right.
So what's the point in struggling toward another kick in the teeth? Why struggle to become jobless and homeless again? Why then fight with everything to get my head back above water for it to happen all over again?
Too many straws on this camels back now
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Post by roland on May 19, 2017 7:14:45 GMT
Hi sasquatchI'm concerned about you! Are you okay this morning? It sounds as if the negative feelings have become overwhelming so it's really important that you ask someone for help and do it now. I know it's difficult for you to see this at the moment but you are not alone and you are not beyond help! I really suggest that you either ring the Samaritans at 116 123 or go to your nearest A&E and tell them how you feel or make an urgent appointment with your GP. And remember you are not alone! We are here! You are NOT a bad person. Your posts show that you are kind and caring! You had to grow up without support for your ADHD and it sounds as if you did not have much support for being a child. That does NOT make you a bad person! Most importantly know that you are not alone and not beyond help!
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sasquatch
Member's not posted much yet
Posts: 19
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Post by sasquatch on May 19, 2017 7:55:38 GMT
Cheers Roland. Sometimes it just feels as if everything is overwhelming and I'm fighting a really strong current to try and stay on a level.
Think the accumulation of a lot of things got to me and I needed to put it in words.
Each day is a brand new fight hey ho
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Post by marionk on May 19, 2017 8:05:24 GMT
Don't let the b******s grind you down! You are most definitely a decent person! Ok just seen you've pulled yourself back out of the blues, so will leave it at that
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Post by roland on May 19, 2017 8:53:22 GMT
Hi sasquatch, I'm glad you're feeling a bit better! Yes indeed each day is a new fight and I'm also glad you posted about it! For some of us the struggle is made worse because we've been taught, as youngsters, not to have any compassion for ourselves at all with the result that we're now carrying heavy burdens of shame and self-criticism. Just in case it's helpful here's a link to an article about Compassion Focused Therapy. It says that people who've had hard experiences as children can become highly sensitive to rejection and criticism from others and that we quickly become self-attacking. It describes why we need to learn to be compassionate towards ourselves. I hope you find it helpful and not overwhelming or patronising; I don't mean to be! Roland
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sasquatch
Member's not posted much yet
Posts: 19
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Post by sasquatch on May 19, 2017 8:57:31 GMT
I'll give that a read when I'm sat in one place. But as you suggest childhood was a struggle of being constantly told how bad and lazy I am so as an adult I'm hyper critical of myself. Sounds like something that might help so thank you
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