Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jun 1, 2009 10:27:19 GMT
Hi everyone,
Not sure I need advise, just a moan!
My 5 year old is so anxious about school every day he kicks off about going. Some days he has headaches (not sure if they are real!). Today I have given in and am going to take him when he feels better. I mostly don't give in, maybe once every couple of months. I just find it so emotionally hard. School isn't terrible but I know it is hard for him ( went through it myself). Some people think I am weak and should ingore his feeling but I think in the long term it is quite destructive. I just don't know what to think and do, no one seems to want to support me. I'm fed up! X
|
|
|
Post by twix on Jun 1, 2009 16:33:10 GMT
*hug* for you and another for your little one.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jun 1, 2009 19:43:43 GMT
mrs muddle when you say no one wants to support you, who have you tried? Have you asked for your son to see an educational psychologist or educational welfare officer for their advice? I am sory if you have exhausted these already. jayj
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jun 1, 2009 21:19:27 GMT
Thanks both of you
He has seen 2 ed psyc's through cahm's but they both specialised in ASD. Both agreed he had a problem but wouldn't commit to what. The has now been refered to the school one. I've got another meeting at the school in a couple of weeks. I am basically ploughing through the system. It just takes so long and finding someone that is willing to look past a Connors questionaire is impossible. All the time they are messing about my son is loosing out and that's just not fair! Sorry it just makes me really mad!
|
|
|
Post by lily on Jun 3, 2009 13:46:04 GMT
Hi Mrsmuddle,
I read this the other day but forgot to reply.
I bet it is very difficult for you to send your son to school if it makes him so unhappy.
I actually saw a young girl having a tantrum at the bus stop the other day and I thought to myself I wonder if she has any problems like ADHD because she was carrying on so much I thought no child could hate it that much without having something like ADHD!
If I was in your situation I know I would give in aswell! Have you tried all those mind tricks that, that annoying supernanny woman uses?!
What do you think your son has?
Lily x
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jun 3, 2009 14:41:26 GMT
Hi lily, Without a doubt my son had ADHD. He is nearly six and just started sleeping though the night (he has had melatonin for 2 years just to get him to sleep). He forgets everything, like it could take him 20 minutes to get dressed in the morning if left alone eg "Z why are you walking round naked except for one sock" LOL! He has big highs and lows, a crazy temper, he is very 'in your face'. Never stops talking unless after school when watching telly. Then he completely zones out and you have to stand in front of him so that he 'hears' you. He keeps saying he is deaf but I've had that checked twice. He says he is confused at school and has no friends. So you can see where I'm coming from! Poor little girl. I'm such a softie when a kid is crying, espcially if I think there's a problem. Thanks for the reply Lily x
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jun 12, 2009 8:57:19 GMT
Hi everyone, Am new to the site (I thought I was just an ecentric mad person but now I know I am not alone! Yippee!). This is my first post! Regarding your son Mrs Muddle, my son has ADHD and has found school hard. What I would say is firstly see if there is any issue regarding bullying or misunderstandings. Although my son is hard work he is also v sensitive and can easily get things out of proportion. Secondly, see how much extra support the school are giving him, its no excuse for them to say that cant afford it, as school are now given a budget specifically for kids like ours who need extra support. Thirdly, keep asking for "an assessment of special educational needs", remember you have more power than the school to demand this from your local education authority. I dont know why! Fourthly, if you feel like you are getting nowhere, threaten to home school him, but you have to sound serious even if you aren't. You are under pressure and there is nothing so heart wrenching as seeing your child distressed, so I dont see anything wrong with passing on the stress to people who can do something about it! If you have somenone who can help you concentrate for long enough, you could try reading up on the "Special Educational Needs: Code of Practice" It has a chapter on Requesting an Assessment. My copy is old though so I dont think I should quote from it but here is the link www.inclusion.ngfl.gov.uk/All I can say now is best of luck, and dont let the b's get you down! T. X
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jun 12, 2009 8:59:40 GMT
By the way, I have also just been diagnosed with Adult ADHD too, so that together with my daughter's ASD means we are one heck of a family!
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jun 12, 2009 10:57:04 GMT
Hi Tammy Thanks for the tips. Seems you know me already "getting someone to help me focus"! I do find read quite difficult ( think I'm a bit dyslexic too). Your family is similar to mine. Me and husband ADHD, teenage son asd and lots of other stuff and the little one probably ADHD. It's a blooming nightmare trying to keep on top of things isn't it. Thanks again, Mrs M
|
|
|
Post by twix on Jun 12, 2009 18:16:45 GMT
hi Tammy
|
|
|
Post by .... on Jun 17, 2009 22:36:07 GMT
Hi Mrsmuddle,
This is going to sound really daft.. But does your school run a breakfast club? I know this'll sound weird but my daughter has such better days when she goes.
She still eats breakfast here before she goes lol, but I can only figure it lets her acclimatise before work is expected from her. And reduces the percentage of the school day that is the most difficult.
I realise, if one is available, he mightn't like to try it till he's older. But hang in there.
(And hello to Tammy71, nice to meet ya.)
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jun 18, 2009 7:26:38 GMT
Hi chysalis
Thanks but I tried it! Went well for a few months then they changed it to a strutured club with organised sport (which he struggles with). So the tears started again. Good idea though, if the school hadn't messed up! X
|
|
jules
Member's posted somewhat
You can conquer almost any fear if you wish - fear doesn't exist anywhere except the mind
Posts: 83
|
Post by jules on Jun 18, 2009 22:47:29 GMT
Mrs Muddle, I feel for you I know the feeling only too well. I have spent the last 5 years trying to get my son to school and go to work myself. I a week I don't think I have ever started work on time - I felt like the naughty girl. I would be called to the school or there would be some appointment to attend. I was constantly in tears, my heart would pound and my head felt so full I thought I may explode !! Kids pick up on all are emotions so try to stay calm - I know it's not easy - keeping going nothing stays the same forever! Hiugs from Jules xx
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jun 18, 2009 23:00:19 GMT
Hello Twix and Chrysallis. Sorry for the delay.
Did any of my suggestions help Mrs Muddle?
You said its hard keeping on top of things??? I dream of being organised and having a tidy house (and life!). Mind you, a friend of mine found a picture at the tip that she just had to buy,
It has a drawing of a sofa with small cushions on it, and on the cushions are embroidered "A clean house is the sign of a mispent life!", "Creative minds are rarely tidy!, and finally "Dull women have immaculate homes!", and who am I to contradict such clever observations!
|
|
|
Post by .... on Jun 18, 2009 23:38:04 GMT
Hi mrsmuddle,
Its a shame they changed the school club. Everytime our school change something and create a new problem it makes me feel mega guilty for not home-schooling, cause it seems so much like they're trying to put a square peg in a round hole when teaching my daughter.
If its any consolation I think once they get a good bit older they get more of a chance to study things that suit each student better. Well at least I'm clinging to that thought anyway.
|
|
|
Post by twix on Jun 22, 2009 17:31:24 GMT
I have the "dull women have immaculate houses" one somewhere lol. And I should be doing housework now and I'm on here.
|
|