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Post by Deleted on Feb 19, 2010 8:39:57 GMT
is overreacting a part of this thing? When I can't deal with something, usually emotionally, I seem to go crazy. I say the most incorrigible things that I can't ever take back and I'm not rationally that person. I definitely believe I have this thing and I'm comfoted by coming here and reading stories that mirror my own. I don't want dx because I'm not strong enough for rejection and some people I've already told who I thought would be supportive, made me feel worse - I understand it is their lack of understanding & they think they are telling me for the best that this is an American/made-up/latest hype. I'm not bothered about dx. So how do I help myself? This morning I over-reacted so badly (I recognise it quite quickly) but can't stop myself. I sent hateful things via email and text to my ex because he told me something I didn't like. How do I help myself to react normally? I hate feeling this way. Normally I am a good person. This makes me feel rotten and I thought for years it was him making me feel this way but now I think it may be the ADHD or maybe it is just me? I can't hold down a job, like many others on here, and he said I have it cushty?? life cos he works so many hours and supports the kids. I see his point!!!! But I don't know how to stop. I want to be a better person. I want to be strong - like friends I have. I want to support my family, earn a living, put something back into the community, feel good about myself. But I feel confused, empty, low self-esteem, like I'm good for little and have become a recluse. I'm so unhappy. Sorry to rant. I think this site is only thing keeping me sane at present.
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Post by phil on Feb 19, 2010 15:56:47 GMT
Hey cranky, stress causes a lot of over reaction little things can do You're head in worse than a big issue! On top of this there are negative Thought cycles where you plant seeds of dout that grow into oak tree's
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Post by twix on Feb 19, 2010 19:14:32 GMT
Yeah its something we do, live in the moment stuff, too late by the time we calm down, can try to retrain yourself not to answer when upset but it might take a while. As for anyone telling you its made up they are idiots. The worst thing about this thing is peoples attitudes sometimes. I don't see how you can sort this out without facing up to it and it seems to me that you aren't. I know that doesn't sound nice but I don't know how else to put it. Get a dx because then you can get the help you need. You don't have to tell people if you don't want. Anyway, hope you feel better soon and sorry if I'm too blunt or bossy.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 19, 2010 20:19:26 GMT
yes Phil I definitely recognise I am stressed - caught in a catch-22 now. Recognise symptoms - stress about it. Get stressed - stress about it! Also am doubting myself, I know, and am already quite a medium oak tree. The positive is - I see it and I want to change.
LF - it is when I'm hurt - I see that too. It isn't nice or acceptable just not sure how manageable.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 19, 2010 20:20:39 GMT
Everyone seems to be singing the same tune re. dx so to the Drs I go on Monday - if strong enough. Don't worry re. blunt & bossy Twix - sometimes I need it
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Post by andy12345 on Feb 20, 2010 1:46:50 GMT
OVERRRRRRRRRRRRREACTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Whatever I have, I am capable to go from sane to mad in very short time and to sane again in an equally short time. It's not good for anyone.
Sometimes I just lie down, close my eyes and just try and reach a stage between sleep and awake. I find that as my eyes are shut it allows me not to look at various irritants around me so therefore there are less fireworks. After about 2 hours, I'm usually ok o.O
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Post by boo on Feb 20, 2010 12:17:32 GMT
- caught in a catch-22 now. Recognise symptoms - stress about it. Get stressed - stress about it! - it is when I'm hurt - I see that too i know where you are coming from. i dont disagree with the others re dx but i do wanna say its not an overnight 'cure' there is alot of re-training like twix said and that can happen whether we are dx or not. in think its good to recognise where we have difficulties or issues, but not to the point of total self reproach. which we seem to be quite good at, well i know i am anyway as the saying goes grant me the serenity To accept the things I cannot change; The courage to change the things that I can; And the wisdom to know the difference.
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Post by boo on Feb 20, 2010 13:08:25 GMT
sorry, i hope my reply didnt come across as negative. i think what i mean is, your OP sounded alot like me in many ways and i know i 'learned' that attack was the best form of defense from a very early age. for me, recognising that is one thing but a) changing the habit of a lifetime is extremely difficult b) putting into perspective what does actually need changing can be tricky. i have spent my life trying to become somebody else, somebody that would fit in, be liked, not piss people off .... dont seem to have managed it too well though
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Post by phil on Feb 22, 2010 19:08:07 GMT
People say I have always had a short fuse. None of us want to be like this! I find if you get you're Issues out fast and don't let them feaster the better it is and when there's multiple issues or there's Other things like doctors app or multiple things to do it gets worse!
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Post by Deleted on Feb 23, 2010 14:48:50 GMT
i totally understand where you guys are coming from. i have a real problem with my anger. i have said many things to people that i have seriously regretted later. it's not nice at all and i'm glad i'm not alone. it's like one word or one action can make your whole personality change in a second.
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Post by phil on Feb 28, 2010 0:07:04 GMT
I get annoyed with people who know me better than I know myself and ask annoying "why" questions Why do you do this? Why don't you do that? Even if I get my add/adhd d/x I'm going to respond in the same way and tell them where to go! Lol
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Post by QPAFP9D on Mar 3, 2010 17:41:52 GMT
perfectly normal
another descriptive would be unable to calm down
diagnosis helps because IMHO you feel less needfull of blaming yourself, I often now say to people before I get to a situation where Im going to get stressed...hey, ill get stressed but just ignor me its the adhd playing tricks and they are Perfectly good about it. The other day in my analytical methods tutorial someone came to me and asked for help on some kind of Math and I had forgotton my books so i had to tell him I couldnt help right then, about 5 times =) when he eventually left me alone I turned to my mate and he was laghing his ass off and said ' its amazing the differance in the way you talk to people like that dpending on your stress levels', I said do you perhaps mean if id been stressed I wouldve told him to fuk off ? Yup was the reply Its who we are, tell people why and theyll react better Dont shy from a diagnosis, its only a positive and a help to you (when it eventually comes) As for a cushy life, for me thats like saying it to a quadraplegic, were still disabled but with us its less visible and weve usually had to cope without help forever. Personally Id apologise to the Ex and say 'sorry, I was being an ass because you annoyed me' 2 wrongs and all that =) Aside from that it could also be partial Autism spectrum or Aspergers, I have them too ( scored 75%) and do what you do...
Good luck =)
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