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Post by dizzydumpling on Oct 14, 2011 21:41:35 GMT
Sounds like she has "issues" - perhaps suggest she goes for anger management....and then duck very quickly! Seriously, hope things get better with her - it must feel very intimidating to have to work next to someone behaving like that Best of luck with the crazy bitch! x
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Post by Mouse on Oct 15, 2011 9:05:36 GMT
When I was newly started at a job I experienced 'unnecessary attitude' from a colleague but management already had her in their sights for the sack. Maybe that might be the case here and they're giving her enough rope to hang herself.
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Post by mizmog on Oct 17, 2011 17:32:56 GMT
Hi guys... Sorry to go on but it's really helping to be able to verbalise all this...
The lady in question wasn't there today but I don't know if it's me, but all this seems to hv changed to whole dynamics of the relationships and the attitude towards me... Today only 3 of us there and two I would normally just be relaxed around but it just feels so tense... They don't talk to me or relate to me in any way but r pleasant enough if I speak to them about some work.. I don't know if it's me or if they hv just backed off because of this woman! It really is like it's come down to choosing sides and I am pretty lonely on this side ...
I did my work but not to the best I could hv, just literally did my job ... Just starting to feel so depressed when I think about going there everyday... I am trying to think of ways to lift the depression and just go in all bouncy and happy but as soon as I walk in the doors it hits me like a sledge hammer!
Was really hoping the concerta would help but it's making no difference other than stopping me from loosing my cool!
Anyone got any suggestions to just change the way I think? And stop myself even worrying about these people? It's like being 10 and longing to be in the 'it' gang! Stupid immature feeling! Aarrrgghhh
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Post by dizzydumpling on Oct 17, 2011 23:56:43 GMT
Hi mizmog - sorry to hear this is still going on! I hope you won't mind if I say this, as it might come out sounding wrong - but although I don't doubt for a minute that some people (one particularly) have been downright shitty with you, and there's a chance that perhaps others have taken sides, could it not also be possible that because you're so depressed with the whole business you're perceiving other people's behaviour towards you as more negative than it is. This is something that has happened to me a lot, where I've perceived something to be a certain way, and in return, I've been behaving in a more reserved fashion which they have then misread as me being weird or unfriendly with them....and so on..... The silly thing is, this happens to me a lot, but at the time when it's happening, I even go through a mental check-list to see if there's anything I could be doing that might seem 'offish' and I never think I am - but it is always when I'm feeling depressed or paranoid, so I guess I must be wearing it on my sleeve like a big 'f*** off' sign! PLease don't feel that I'm trying to deny what's actually going on with your colleagues - it's just a thought and when this has been the case, it's no less easy to deal with! Sorry I can't offer any help as such. It's not immature though - I think most of us just want to be accepted & live a quiet life! Good luck x Edit: Just realised that right from the start you said "I don't know if it's me but..." This is probably what you meant isn't it!
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Post by mizmog on Oct 18, 2011 9:27:38 GMT
Dizzy I think u could be right.. Am keeping ur advice in mind today and c if I can't change this mind set... Thanks hun ... Will keep u posted!
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Post by snickerz on Oct 18, 2011 10:27:14 GMT
and if that fails get the fucking tank
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Post by Mouse on Oct 18, 2011 13:05:17 GMT
and if that fails get the fucking tank Or you could ask them what their problem is. Sometimes a calm and unflustered and direct approach is best. They then either have to say what their problem is.. or carry on acting up and look like the great tit they are!
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Post by mizmog on Oct 18, 2011 17:31:11 GMT
you are gonna love this one... Dizzy took your advice (Kept the tank in mind though lol) decided to approach people like their had never been a problem - and they responded!! It wasn't fantastic but it was definitely a start and the woman in question was left looking quite awkward and shifting in her seat alot...
Anyway, the best part was being pulled out this afternoon by the boss and me rolling my eyes thinking here we go again - she took me into the meeting room to say how she thinks things had really settled down and that she knows there was a problem between me and said woman - she asked how i felt and if it was awkward did I think i wanted to move - my response... NO! i nicely explained, that I felt I would really like things to be as they were before and have a nice rapport with M (we'll call her M cos its easier) for the sake of the business but also said that if the boss felt it would be beneficial for me to look at another desk, I will - I couldn't believe what she said next... I would rather you didnt she said because I think it works really well with you there and I want SOME people to understand I am not moving anyone for the sake of 'clicky little friendships'!! she went on to say ... M only works when she is not sat near her chatty friends so i would rather you stayed where u are...
I nearly fell off the chair! ha ha ha ha but of course I was very professionally and kept my straight face! lol made me feel loads better though and I had quite a smile on my face the rest of the day!
So it looks like you were all right maybe and they have got their eyes on her and all i needed to do was loose the f*** *ff face! lol
Thanks guys - its helped so much being able to ramble on here x x x
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Post by kakema on Oct 18, 2011 18:08:01 GMT
Result! ;D
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Post by mizmog on Dec 20, 2011 13:14:00 GMT
Do u know what, I was really starting to get things together and even attended the Xmas party however.... I hv been awarded, wait for it.... Most organized/best organizer Best time keeping Only silly little thing but boy was I chuffed!! Only now because no one else in our office got anything, the playground antics hv started again!! I am so sick of being made to feel shit when I do something good, it just takes me back to being at home when I would do something good and be told it wasn't good enough and my brothers/sisters should hv been praised not me!!! Ok moaning again I know but I felt so good for about 24 hours and now I hv gone backwards about 2 months
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