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Post by Deleted on Nov 29, 2011 16:26:37 GMT
How are you different now from when you were a child in terms of your ADHD symptoms?
Have you calmed down a lot? Do you know what habits you have developed to cope with it?
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Post by Deleted on Nov 29, 2011 17:51:37 GMT
My symptoms seem identical - I just deal with them differently.
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Post by mizmog on Nov 29, 2011 18:31:20 GMT
As an unaware child, I was completely different, as I became aware of ppl telling me I was nuts and everything was my fault, I began to develop paranoia and caution... So where as, as a child/teenager I would hv no fear, bound around leaving a trail of madness I now approach everything as if I will do it wrong and avoid walking into anywhere where there is ppl!
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Post by adamv on Nov 29, 2011 18:57:17 GMT
I am not violent or angry now I am extremely passive. The frustration is still there (that's what caused the behaviour) but I can deal with it now.
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Post by mighty on Nov 30, 2011 0:03:29 GMT
Calmer I think, but still just as scatterbrained! Used to be very off the rails as a kid.. now I guess I'm only a little off the rails haha. I'm aware of my thoughts now too, its strange. I don't think I ever used to look inside my brain and think 'wow, overload'. As I've got older I've noticed how relentless my thoughts really are, and started to realise that many things spinning around the head and getting in the way of each other isn't 'normal'. It's weird I notice the 'quietness' that adhd drugs bring now too, whereas when I was a kid they didn't make me feel any different in this way from what I remember. I can control how I act a lot better too I think (most of the time), got into a lot of trouble at school but generally quite good at work and uni in terms of impulsiveness On the other hand, child issues and coping mechanisms have turned into adult ones, which are probably more dangerous..
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Post by mccutcheon on Nov 30, 2011 11:48:26 GMT
Hm... I think the physical hyperactivity I had as a child has turned into hyperactivity in my head as I learned to control the fidgeting. now I can keep still physically but my brain is running around like crazy.
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Post by Deleted on Nov 30, 2011 12:17:17 GMT
I have no idea how to answer this question. I have enough trouble remembering what i did yesterday much less what I was like when I was a child. I know I was on ritalin, my parents split up, i hated my step dad, my mum worked all the time, my teachers put me in a cardboard box in class so i wouldn't disrupt the rest of the class while working, i crawled on my hands and knees once in class and barked like a dog during reading time once. I threw a pair of safety scissors across the room once... meh dunno, i got in trouble a lot! most kids didn't like me because i asked too many questions in class. i wasn't popular until i got into my latest years of school and even then I was a mixer of groups and never in the same group of kids all the time. I did loads of sports and groups at school... never did my homework and had un-timed testing for any of my major scholastic tests.
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Post by Deleted on Nov 30, 2011 14:41:56 GMT
As a child, I was wild at home - hyperactive, bang head off wall, impulsive, etc. Although, in school I was well behaved, but I attribute this to the anxiety I felt around unfamiliar people (as in people not in my immediate family).
Now I'm more inattentive, get bored easily and start fidgeting, etc if I've been sitting still for too long. I'm not really hyperactive anymore.
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Post by Deleted on Nov 30, 2011 21:24:53 GMT
Hm... I think the physical hyperactivity I had as a child has turned into hyperactivity in my head as I learned to control the fidgeting. now I can keep still physically but my brain is running around like crazy. i second that other than that im still the same just with more responsibilities xx
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Post by dizzydumpling on Nov 30, 2011 22:49:26 GMT
I hope you don't mind me contributing to this thread as I'm not diagnosed with ADHD, but I still consider myself to have it, even if the docs think I'm just aspie (Checked out an aspie forum recently - never again!! I'm sticking here with you normal people! ;D ) I don't think there's been 2 distinct periods of 'childhood' and 'adulthood', but I reckon I could break my behaviour/personality down approximately by decade: 1- 10 years - I've never been physically hyper apart from a bit wriggly-squirmy-jiggly, but was always in a daydream at school and generally had a bit of a weird outlook on life looking back. Actually, I was hyper at Brownies - don't ask me why....mega hyper & very bossy....they couldn't cope with me - but not so much at school . I was mostly well behaved at school, although my gran said my mum struggled with me at home and I do remember some 'incidents' - like deliberately damaging things to get my mum back when I was mad at her. I always felt very guilty afterwards though! Did pretty well with school work as I found it easy & really loved writing stories. I remember wanting to please my teachers. 11 - 20 years - My self-esteem plumetted as I realised that I was not liked by other kids and I started to find the work too difficult to keep up with at school. Secondary school maths & the sciences confused me beyond belief, my ability to concentrate got worse and I spent more and more time away with the fairies as no matter how hard I tried, both socially and educationally I seemed doomed to failure. At this point I hadn't realised that I was in any way different - just thought everyone around me was a tw*t, felt sorry for myself and coped by using huge amounts of alcohol and messing with drugs. I also became very very angry, especially toward my mother and also myself, and after I smashed a plant pot over her head (which I'm not proud of), my mum took me to a psych, who I refused to speak to, and so he sent me packing again after one appointment! 21 - 30 years - By my 20s I'd realised that there was something about me that was wrong as just about everyone seemed to hate me no matter how hard I tried to fit in, so I just gave up and gave my life over to being a junkie. It numbed the pain/guilt and provided me with a social circle who seemed to accept me as I was (and believe it or not, some of them were even nice people) However, I still hadn't caught on to the fact that this might be some sort of condition. I just thought I must have been a despicable human being. My personal relationships were still incredibly volatile, I sometimes had physical fights with my boyfriend and occasionaly self-harmed. I was also agoraphobic and barely went out for about 18 months between about 25 & 27. 31 - 40 years - the last 10 years have been a revelation! With support from my mum I managed to kick drugs at 27 and get my first job. Since then it's been an uphill struggle but in the last 10 years I've increasingly realised that not everything was my fault (although I know there's plenty that was), and that actually, I've done bloody well to get as far as I have, as looking back, I understood nothing about who I was, how to control myself, why I should control myself and how I should have been behaving to not appear rude or annoying to people. However, Like Meggie99 and Adamv, I really struggle with work and generallly, before becoming a student, found myself so afraid of and depressed with the thought of going to work each day that I sometimes beacme hysterical just at the thought of going on shift. I still did it because I had to - but let's just say that student life has been a blessed relief and I'm now looking at buying a small piece of land and living off it in order to avoid going back into a formal workplace! As usual, I've gone on and on and on, but I think that with every year that goes by I'm now getting to understand myself - what I can and can't cope with, and what I can and can't change - and also the fact that these social norms that all the NTs adhere to so 'naturally' are entirely socially constructed and designed to keep us all in our places anyway! Working these things out have chilled me right out, to the point that the most violent thing I do now is punch pillows whilst pouring out a stream of swear words in the privacy of my own bedroom! I'm still twitchy, still can't concentrate on things that aren't of my choosing, still get depressed and still hate myself sometimes, but discovering that I'm actually a square peg, and no longer trying to cram myself into a round hole has been the best thing I could have done for myself. Sorry that this is so long but as usual I'm struggling to express things in few words. It took a bit of thinking about - and I'm aware it's very 'me me me' but as my tutors will verify, I'm incapable of summarising (hence going over wordcounts by hundreds in assignments !!!)
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Post by odat on Nov 30, 2011 23:18:06 GMT
Great post Dizzy. Even though it was long, I find your writing easy to read. You have nowt to apologise for.
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Post by dizzydumpling on Nov 30, 2011 23:35:22 GMT
Bless you Odat - you do my self esteem wonders!
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Post by Deleted on Dec 1, 2011 6:02:19 GMT
Hey, Diz - being inattentive, I'm not sure I'd picked up that much about you before. What a life! You go, girl - and if you're 'just' aspie, or, frankly, aspie at all, I'll eat that huge, horrid black straw hat I wore to my youngest brothers wedding just to spite my sister-in-law (Note to self: take the damn hat to Oxfam ;D )
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Post by Deleted on Dec 5, 2011 11:31:48 GMT
unpopular as a child. Social pariah now.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 5, 2011 14:54:09 GMT
Currently working on having teachers and staff in school get training so that ADHD kids may get the necessary help and attention, if you sign this petition you'll be helping out Here's the link to the petition .. Pls forward it to your friends , family so that they may sign .. appreciate it ! www.thepetitionsite.com/1/support-teacher-staff-training-adhd/Have a great week! OH FFS!! get your own thread and stop spamming!!
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Post by dizzydumpling on Dec 5, 2011 16:51:14 GMT
I'll eat that huge, horrid black straw hat I wore to my youngest brothers wedding just to spite my sister-in-law Mmmmmm - that sure sounds like a tasty hat ;D
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spikeyxx
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Post by spikeyxx on Dec 11, 2011 9:31:43 GMT
I feel my symptoms as much as I did as a child, but hide them better, and maybe even benefit from them to a point. Relationships have always been difficult for me, especially conversations between multiple people where I struggle to assert myself. One on one is incredibly easy because I'm an excellent listener, and enjoy the mechanics of listen, contribute, listen, contribute etc. Groups on the other hand are terrible as I struggle to assert myself, and become increasingly segregated and frustrated as I struggle to find my place. This reminds me very much of childhood, where on a playground I would be relegated to a corner in most activities. My childhood was one of being on the outside looking in.
Simple social cues that seem to be second nature for other people, are bloody awkward for me. I've had to learn to people read from scratch and I feel like I developed through trial and error what everyone else was born with. The flip-side is, I probably have better people reading skills and intuition than most people I know, as long as someone holds my interest. Once I get bored, or distracted, I once again feel emotionally disabled.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 11, 2011 17:07:24 GMT
Have you got ASD in your mix as well, Spikey?
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Post by boo on Dec 12, 2011 7:18:54 GMT
by about 2.5', at a guess
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spikeyxx
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Post by spikeyxx on Dec 12, 2011 9:40:58 GMT
Have you got ASD in your mix as well, Spikey? Suspected by parents, but childhood psychiatrist didn't think so.
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