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Post by Deleted on Apr 16, 2012 15:14:18 GMT
I've been off them unofficially for just over three weeks, but my GP gave me the official nod today. Not sure I'm looking forward to telling the psychiatrist I've made this choice, though! While on them (since just before Christmas) I learned a few things about how to get things done. I'm by no means "fixed" but I can cope a little better. The benefits, however, are thrown into darkness by the zombie state. It wasn't until I came off them for a show (I had a lead role in a musical) and let them wear off that I realised just what they turn me into. It's such hard work keeping up the amount of getting-things-done and I'll have to start seeing people more regularly (occupational therapist etc.) to improve, but it's nice to be me again. I feel so much more alert and observant again, I have all my emotions back and my perception has returned. Okay, so my stammer (brain-too-fast related, not a speech impediment) has returned and I'm back to speaking sentences in the wrong order sometimes, but at least it's me that's doing it!
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Post by twix on Apr 16, 2012 16:17:53 GMT
It's your choice of course, but have you considered experimenting with dosage and/or change to or from instant release or slow release. Feeling like a zombie isn't normal, but it might be that a slight change can give you the benefits without the zombie feeling.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 16, 2012 16:39:45 GMT
maybe you should go back on them.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 16, 2012 17:09:25 GMT
Twix - even on the lowest dosage, there was an element of that. Definitely too much of it compared to any benefits. On the next dosage up I was still having concerning physical side-effects after several months, on top of everything else I didn't like. The "benefits" were just enough that I was able to learn a few useful techniques and I find I can still apply those without medication, so at the moment I'm happier with the idea of continuing down that route instead.
kameel - having discussed side-effects and unwanted other effects with my GP, I'm certain of my decision. Why do you suggest going back on them? What's your reasoning?
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Post by Deleted on Apr 16, 2012 17:14:02 GMT
lol i was being cheeky.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 16, 2012 18:17:18 GMT
Ah. Yeah, that didn't come across.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 16, 2012 19:34:43 GMT
Ah. Yeah, that didn't come across. neither did your patronising tone in the other thread! so we're good.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 16, 2012 19:46:08 GMT
It wasn't supposed to be patronising. It was supposed to be clearing up what appeared to be a misunderstanding. Your passive-aggression over it is uncalled for.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 16, 2012 20:33:36 GMT
Ding! To your corners, please!
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Post by Deleted on Apr 16, 2012 20:39:27 GMT
the irony is that i'm weaning off my meds atm cause i'm 4wks preggo.... lol
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Post by Deleted on Apr 16, 2012 20:42:53 GMT
Contests kameel
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Post by sherry on Apr 16, 2012 22:38:06 GMT
Kameel, Hormones and ADHD not good lol.
Seriously, I had the same problem the meds gave me some clarity. Concerta turned me into a bit of a zombie every afternoon (on slow release). Straterra stole my soul and made me completely flat, I almost lost the will to live.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 16, 2012 22:52:38 GMT
Kameel, Hormones and ADHD not good lol. Seriously, I had the same problem the meds gave me some clarity. Concerta turned me into a bit of a zombie every afternoon (on slow release). Straterra stole my soul and made me completely flat, I almost lost the will to live. Glad to know I'm not the only one! One of my best friends was diagnosed a few days after me and is getting on so well on the same meds I had (Ritalin), so we couldn't compare notes on whether the benefits outweighed the other stuff. It was only as the week of the show went on and I came back to being myself that everything cleared up again and I could see how much the meds changed me into something I didn't want to be. Still, being zombie-me did give me a little bit of time to kick some things into shape and now normal-me can get on better with a more solid foundation to work from!
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Post by Deleted on Apr 16, 2012 22:54:34 GMT
Ooo, kameel - well done! Fingers crossed and all that! ;D
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Post by claudhopper on Apr 17, 2012 11:54:57 GMT
Couldn't you go on the meds Mon - Fri only then have a crazy untidy weekend
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Post by Deleted on Apr 17, 2012 12:02:59 GMT
Remember that other meds are also available if you decide at a later date that you want to go back on them. Don't write them all off 'till you have tried them. I got lucky on the third try John
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Post by Deleted on Apr 17, 2012 12:13:55 GMT
Couldn't you go on the meds Mon - Fri only then have a crazy untidy weekend They're supposed to be instant release and out of my system quickly, but I find they take several days to wear off completely. Also, my week doesn't really pan out normally like that and it's different every week. Remember that other meds are also available if you decide at a later date that you want to go back on them. Don't write them all off 'till you have tried them. I got lucky on the third try John I wasn't all that keen on taking any in the first place if I could avoid it, had to be prodded into trying some and I only agreed because they were instant release and not something I'd be "stuck with" for eight hours or whatever If I can get by without them, I'd prefer that.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 17, 2012 18:55:23 GMT
It's your decision, of course, and it's probably annoying that we're clearly second-guessing you. But what you experienced really sounds like quite a severe adverse reaction. You must be one of those who really don't get on with that med - I'm assuming it was mph? A friend of mine found that for her, mph simply acted as a sedative, and she got nasty BP and palpitation side-effects as well. She found that a switch to dexamfetamine worked for her.
You may not have been able to experience the scale of improvement to your symptoms that one would normally expect from a stimulant med, if the side-effects were so severe. When they work, they don't reduce alertness, just allow you to marshall that alert mind and use it more effectively.
People do respond very differently to the different meds, and when they work, they really do relieve the ADHD impairment.
It might be worth trialling one more option - like dex - before you rule meds out. After all, your symptoms were bad enough that you sought medical help - and improved coping strategies on there own will be tiring and at times stressful.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 17, 2012 21:03:42 GMT
I'm a dancer with a body clearly not designed for dancing - tiring and stressful is my forte! I'm struggling with chronic pain at the moment - an ongoing but manageable thing has suddenly turned much bigger. On top of that, I've actually been really busy with performing and writing, which is when I'm at my best anyway, so I haven't been struggling like I do when I haven't got that stuff going on. So yeah, brain full of other things for now. I will keep an open mind towards the other medication in the future if I decide I want to try again, but for now I'm not doing too badly without anything so I don't want to go messing with things-going-well.
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Post by sherry on Apr 17, 2012 21:53:34 GMT
No offence, but why should we have to take meds, they are just another nail in the coffin. If it cures you fine, that's your choice, but I prefer to stay drug free. Too many folks think the drugs are the Holy Grail and for a lot of us they don't suit and that can be a massive disappointment for some. Dex is not an option in my area and I have tried the others. I prefer myself as I am anyway.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 17, 2012 22:23:44 GMT
No offence taken, Sherry - nobody has to medicate. Just trying to maintain awareness of the options.
Lots of people miss their 'real' selves when medicating - they like their spontaneity and the merry randomness of their thoughts. I prefer the steady, calm, version of medicated me - letting my emotional volatility run free generally ends in tears, and not always mine. The rest of me is the same - just a bit more focused.
Mind you, it was different with Ritalin - although I was vastly more effective than on dex, I didn't find that version of me very comfortable to live with - too driven. Makes me wonder whether I'd have been just another ball-breaking city bitch if I hadn't had ADHD.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 17, 2012 22:30:47 GMT
No offence taken.
You don't have to take meds. I was just saying that there are other meds available. Some people may think they are all the same, and get put off when MPH does not work for them.
I personally prefer myself medicated with Dex rather than no meds. I am a lot less angry on the meds,have a clearer head, and I still feel like myself (which I did not on MPH)
Dex should be an option in your area (unless you have had problems with drug abuse in the past). It should be the third option after MPH and the awful Atomoxetine.
Anyone that says they are cured with meds is mistaken. They just offer some kind of help.
John
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Post by Deleted on Apr 18, 2012 18:03:35 GMT
Hi Cakedreams
i thought medication would improve your obsevation and alertness ?
also what happened to your perception when you took meds ?
im trying to figure out the pros and cons of meds - i really did think the medication was to improve all the above.
so apart from making you more productive was there any other benefits over being adhd you ?
Gem
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Post by sherry on Apr 18, 2012 18:55:28 GMT
loooool Shiny.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 18, 2012 20:53:23 GMT
I'm hyperaware and hypersensitive in all my senses. On meds, it was like my thoughts had slowed down (in the way they're supposed to) but I found I couldn't process everything at the speed I used to, make me feel really strange.
The meds didn't make me more productive, as such - they just quashed my impusles and distractability enough for me to learn/develop a few techniques to help me get things done. I found that once I'd learned what to do, I could apply those things even without medication as long as I was busy enough. If I can do it without meds and thereby avoid a complete change of personality, I'm all for it!
But as you can see, more people have had success with meds than haven't so it's more likely that I'm the odd one out.
Edit to something:
My non-stop dreams are something I'm used to. Several dreams a night, all of which I remember, which means I've always got good ideas to write. But on meds, so many of them were nightmares!
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