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Post by mighty on Apr 18, 2012 14:20:11 GMT
Hi Was watching Stephen Fry's documentary on bipolar disorder and he asked sufferers the question 'If there was a button sitting in front of you that could make it all go away, would you press it?' Thought I'd echo this question.. Would you press a button that got rid of your symptoms for the rest of your life? Would have to be no for me I think. Despite all the shit I've caused for myself and others I like being different through good times and bad!
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Post by Deleted on Apr 18, 2012 14:51:15 GMT
Same here.. even though I am on meds to control my rush hour in my head, I still would not want me different as I done loads of stuff what I would not have done otherwise.. (good and bad things lol )
Again, with other illnesses like Bipo.. I think I would press the button..
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Post by Deleted on Apr 18, 2012 15:15:26 GMT
I'd say no, just because I don't know how much of what I have is me and how much is ADHD. If I pressed the button and lost everything good, then where would I be?
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Post by Deleted on Apr 18, 2012 15:33:43 GMT
I would beat my friends and loved ones to death with my own arm after ripping it from my shoulder to reach that button.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 18, 2012 18:06:41 GMT
I would press that button! I know my life could have been so much better without this.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 18, 2012 19:12:09 GMT
Of course I'd press the sodding button! You think I'm not special enough without ADHD? Puh-leeease.
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Post by sherry on Apr 18, 2012 19:25:20 GMT
Mmm, depends on what I would have been like? Lol Amblyman
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Post by Deleted on Apr 18, 2012 20:53:34 GMT
I stand by my arm comment!
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Post by Deleted on Apr 18, 2012 21:20:50 GMT
...they might rip it off you first and press the button on your behalf! ;D
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Post by Deleted on Apr 18, 2012 21:23:12 GMT
Who cares as long as it gets pushed!î‚
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Post by twix on Apr 19, 2012 7:22:15 GMT
I'm really not sure. My life would be easier, but it would also be boring. Some days I would do anything for a calm boring life, its true. But I wouldn't be who I am and have done what I've done without the adhd. The innattentive stuff is hard, the hyperactive, I've learnt to live with, but the impulsive, I have to say I love, it is me and I like not being tied up in worries everytime I do something, I've met great people and had good times whilst other people are still at home doing what needs to be done and being sensible about life. If I knew what time it was and what day to put the dustbin out, and actually remembered to do it, and only went where I was supposed to be going I'd be someone else not me. Much as I'd like the stability, I think it would be dull.
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Post by Mouse on Apr 19, 2012 12:07:18 GMT
I'd press the button even though I'm not on medication by choice and work with what I've got... but if there was a button... I'd be pressing it without hesitation!
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Post by Deleted on Apr 20, 2012 6:09:06 GMT
I'm really not sure. My life would be easier, but it would also be boring. Some days I would do anything for a calm boring life, its true. But I wouldn't be who I am and have done what I've done without the adhd. The innattentive stuff is hard, the hyperactive, I've learnt to live with, but the impulsive, I have to say I love, it is me and I like not being tied up in worries everytime I do something, I've met great people and had good times whilst other people are still at home doing what needs to be done and being sensible about life. If I knew what time it was and what day to put the dustbin out, and actually remembered to do it, and only went where I was supposed to be going I'd be someone else not me. Much as I'd like the stability, I think it would be dull. Mmm. I love being spontaneous - I just don't love my inability to stop myself acting on my impulses - doing and saying things that are ultimately destructive. Neurotypical people aren't all boring and unable to do things on the spur - they are just able to slow their actions down enough to apply whatever judgments they as individuals think are appropriate. That means they can express their sense of fun and spontaneity in a way they can be comfortable with.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 20, 2012 7:20:35 GMT
how about a button, but with options?? So we could keep the stuff we DO like but dump the stuff that we dont?? i would defo go for that! Although knowing me when it came to the time I would forget which options i wanted to choose, and then take too long and my time would run out and I would be back to square one lol. x
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Post by Deleted on Apr 21, 2012 10:28:41 GMT
Exactly that, I am smart, funny, capable and competent. Unfortunately the ADHD pretty much cancels out most of those positives.
I do wish people who say 'ADHD makes me creative/special etc' would actually read up the neuroscience. The ADHD does nothing but hinder, if you do well it's because you can compensate or it's mild enough to not be a problem.
For those of us who really suffer it's infuriating and insulting, basically you are saying 'look at me ADHD is so much fun!'. Well if that's true then why the need for treatment, why the support groups?
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Post by twix on Apr 21, 2012 11:23:11 GMT
I know about the neuro-science thanks, I'm not saying adhd is fun, any more than a survivor of domestic violence is saying that domestic violence is a good thing, if she chooses to say that surviving it made her stronger.
Surviving adhd has made me who I am, strong and empathetic to be able to help others. The treatment helps me and I wish I had it sooner, but I didn't. I am a believer in getting on with what you have been given, not wallowing in self pity, and much as my life would have been different without adhd, I know there is no button, so I suck it up and get on with it. I like my impulsive side, and I'm not going to apologise for that.
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Post by mighty on Apr 21, 2012 12:38:14 GMT
Well I'm going to argue otherwise. I wont give my problems full credit for my creativity (just as I'd never blame everything that goes wrong on them) but I certainly get ideas differently than others due to disorganised thought. I find this helps hugely when starting projects. With essays as a very general example, when others are struggling with set starting points, I've usually typed down enough ideas and varying directions to mould into something first class. It's after this point that I struggle. While others work through in a systematic order I'm finding it a struggle to turn my ideas into a completed essay and can fall behind. Although this means the adhd traits don't always compensate for where they hinder, I'm improving. I believe I'll continue improving and be better for it. With hard work and the right strategies I CAN improve my organisation. Other people however will find it much harder to get into that rapid idea-firing state if their brain doesn't work that way. I think you can work with adhd to be of more benefit than not, but it can go both ways.
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Post by sherry on Apr 21, 2012 18:58:54 GMT
Good/bad, this is a hard one to decide on.
I have fantastic problem solving skills, I am creative, I can visualise finished projects down to the tiniest detail, my mind is lightening quick in a visual or long term memory sense. Flat pack furniture is a piece of piss, I have great spatial awareness and perception. As long as it doesn't involved computers I can learn to do just about anything. All my talents are self taught.
I have friends without ADHD who just can't keep up with me at all. In all honesty I am more skilled than they are. My friend says I am a bit scatty with moments of brilliance.
Would I swap it all for a good memory and better focus, hmm still not sure. I have improved on most of my ADHD issues, apart from my shockingly shit memory, distraction and impulsiveness. It is really only the short term memory issues that massively piss me off, if I could cure that I wouldn't press the button.
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Post by twix on Apr 21, 2012 19:43:57 GMT
That's what I love about talking to other adhders, its so good to talk to someone who can keep up.
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Post by prunesquallor on Apr 21, 2012 20:18:29 GMT
Yes, but....
I have, in the course of dealing with ADHD before I was diagnosed, had to think about my life and others lives in unusual and, I hope, empathic and non-blaming ways. Having had a hidden disability myself, I am (I hope) more sensitive and sympathetic to the struggles of others..
I do wish I had been DXd earlier (round about 1970 would have been good), but I do feel this much at least has been of value to me. (And yes, most of it's impact on my life has been pretty disastrous).
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Post by Deleted on Apr 21, 2012 21:56:18 GMT
Excellent thread!
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Post by Deleted on Apr 22, 2012 23:45:43 GMT
Meanwhile people without the disorder are getting on with their lives, completing courses, getting degrees getting and keeping work and getting on with other people.
There's an awful lot of rationalising going on Here, 'it doesnt matter I lost that job I can get a better one'. 'that person got the job but I would be better at it'. Etc.
Meanwhile the bills arent being paid, my partner wants to leave me and I am slowly rotting mentally and physically. But hey I am so much more spontaneous than other people and I have great ideas!
If the multiverse theory is true, somewhere there is a non ADHD version of me, I wonder is he a doctor? A paramedic? Is he married to Jules my ex that I drove away? Does he get to drive a megane RS turbo? Probably not, but he is a hell of a lot closer than me.
I wouldn't push that button I would hammer it.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 23, 2012 8:56:29 GMT
In my alternative reality, I'd be a medical doctor, because I wouldn't have dropped science just to thwart my mother. I'd probably be a good doctor, because I would have been able to study properly and wouldn't have given someone an overdose or forgotten to pass on an important fact to a colleague, and I'd have written up case notes and done and published solid, thorough research.
Or if I'd stuck with what I did do (languages and linguistics), I might be an academic, or doing something with the Arabic-speaking nations in the UN, or I'd be a high-ranking civil servant, probably at the Foreign Office or secret service (language and code-breaking skills). I might be living in France. Or I'd be one of those phenomenally successful City women who do interviews with women's magazines.
I might still be a practising Catholic; probably wouldn't have a child, but I'd be married to an equally successful jolly nice bloke, we'd have a flat in town and a weekend place somewhere pretty, and we'd go on great holidays and lie by beaches - I'd enjoy doing nothing at all.
I'd be a talented amateur pianist, and would do some kind of craft well - probably silversmithing. I'd have a healthy social circle of people like me that I had dinner parties with, and would do a bit of local politics and/or mainstream charity work.
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...well, that was fun - more fun than clearing my inbox after a fortnight out of the office, and certainly more fun than all the shit I wrote this morning in an email to my best friend, who helps me cope when it all starts to weigh a bit heavy. He understands what it's like, coz he has ADHD too.
Do I feel sad that my life is different and in many ways less shiny than my might-have-been? Not really. That's just someone else's life. Not mine. A bit like reading an escapist novel - nothing like a bit of escapism; I just try not to let it chafe when real life looks different. ;D
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Post by sherry on Apr 23, 2012 19:17:30 GMT
My only regret is I am unable to prove I am a genius!!!
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Post by Deleted on Apr 23, 2012 19:31:37 GMT
Notice I say probably not! The chief difference between me and 'mirror me' is that if he isn't a doctor, paramedic or at least senior nurse on good money with good mates and a solid relationship it's his fault and he deserves a slapping for fucking up.
Me I never had a chance of achieving those things, however I try, whatever I do I am hamstringed before I start without even knowing it.
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hopeful
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Post by hopeful on Apr 23, 2012 20:33:22 GMT
My only regret is I am unable to prove I am a genius!!! My greatest frustration ;D
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Post by Deleted on Apr 24, 2012 18:00:52 GMT
No. It took me so long to accept my self and my ADHD. Its part of me, I am happy with who I am. If I had not been through what I have, I would not be the person I am. However I would press the button which stopped me having far worse symptoms when I am stressed.
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jamieg
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Post by jamieg on Apr 28, 2012 1:17:36 GMT
i'd press! I've found that being intelligent is overrated. I'm sick of working under people with less ability and brain power. I can think of allsorts of deep, complex, and profound stuff but what's the point? I never pay bills on time, never quite finish doing the dishes, housework, diy jobs, gardening etc. I've got all this natural ability to learn stuff very quickly - almost photographic memory when i'm interested but my disorganised brain never quite lets me take advantage of it. Very frustrating!
Jamie
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Post by Deleted on Apr 30, 2012 21:30:59 GMT
I would press the button.... If I remembered where I last put the button to find it again.......if I remembered to press the button when I was supposed to......if I didnt get sidetracked by something else on the way to pressing the button......if I didnt interupt the person telling me about the button.......if i could ensure that I didnt mess up by pressing the wrong button....if I didnt manage to break the button.....and I could press it several times in quick succession and I could do it loudly!!!!!!!!!! ......and become normal.............. ?? HELL YEAH!!!!!!!!!!
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Post by Deleted on Apr 30, 2012 23:12:30 GMT
And then be fired for not pushing the button correctly or breaking it.
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