Post by tarante11a on May 2, 2013 16:29:43 GMT
Hi there
I'm very new to the forum, ADHD and all that entails so please bear with me if I ask stupid things, burble on and wot not. I'm also not sure where to start, the last 24 hours have been a bit over-whelming.
I had my ADHD/psychiatric assessment yesterday and I've been diagnosed with combo-type ADHD.
I only found out about ADHD in adults about 6 weeks ago, and after doing some research (the VERY intense kind - you know the one) felt certain the problems hounding me for years as a 'grown-up' were based around ADHD. I'm extremely lucky in that my Mum was willing to listen to me, and then able and willing to help finance an assessment very quickly. She's understandably despairing and baffled by my chaotic life and wants me to get sorted out.
What's been particularly strange is seeing my old school reports. Over and over again I'm described as an intelligent good kid (go me) but never bring the right things/books to classes, I'm disorganised/untidy, I day-dream/can't concentrate and I never hand in my homework.
I'm mentioning this because I've been TERRIFIED over the last couple of weeks that MY certainty of being ADHD would be trivialised or ignored. Understandably I suppose, most of my previous GPs were exasperated by my poor response to antidepressants and have probably thought me attention-seeking, hypochondriac , work shy or all three. I dunno. Incidentally, I had a meeting with a CPN last week who utterly dismissed ADHD and told me he thought I had borderline personality disorder. I have every sympathy for anyone with this, but I knew that wasn't my problem. Anyway, I've felt very low indeed.
Seeing my teacher's reports, in black and white for all the world to see, was both a relief and a sadness to me. I can't get my head around what yesterday means to my future, and I think I'm a positive happy person in general, but I can't help feeling so sad about the time I spent screwing things up, thinking I was mad/bad/lazy/useless/stupid. I know this feeling will pass (too much bloody time to make up for! Bring it on!!) but I do feel very overwhelmed by it all.
Today I had my first dose of Medikinet (methylphenidate) 5mg, which suddenly made me want to sleep for 20mins but now I feel pretty good - clear and calm. I’m writing this post after all! Going to be experimenting with dosage for the next week or so.
I'm not really sure why I'm writing this. I suppose I need to say this stuff to people who would understand and to get it out of my head. I'm excited for the future, although at 43¾ ( ) I'm not sure what I'm going to do! I've not had a job in 6 years *blushes with shame*.
I wondered what other people had done and how they got advice about what to do next in terms of Life Stuff, rather than the medical side. I'm in Gloucestershire where treatment and support seems a little thin on the ground. Have other people found support groups helpful? If so, I'd be very willing - KEEN in fact - to travel to London or Bristol to meet people.
Anyway, I'll shut up now but any advice, stories, insight etc etc you have will be very gratefully received!
Onward and upward!
Very best wishes to you all!
T xxx
P.S. Thanks so much for reading this, I know it's very probably a TLDR situation! x)
I'm very new to the forum, ADHD and all that entails so please bear with me if I ask stupid things, burble on and wot not. I'm also not sure where to start, the last 24 hours have been a bit over-whelming.
I had my ADHD/psychiatric assessment yesterday and I've been diagnosed with combo-type ADHD.
I only found out about ADHD in adults about 6 weeks ago, and after doing some research (the VERY intense kind - you know the one) felt certain the problems hounding me for years as a 'grown-up' were based around ADHD. I'm extremely lucky in that my Mum was willing to listen to me, and then able and willing to help finance an assessment very quickly. She's understandably despairing and baffled by my chaotic life and wants me to get sorted out.
What's been particularly strange is seeing my old school reports. Over and over again I'm described as an intelligent good kid (go me) but never bring the right things/books to classes, I'm disorganised/untidy, I day-dream/can't concentrate and I never hand in my homework.
I'm mentioning this because I've been TERRIFIED over the last couple of weeks that MY certainty of being ADHD would be trivialised or ignored. Understandably I suppose, most of my previous GPs were exasperated by my poor response to antidepressants and have probably thought me attention-seeking, hypochondriac , work shy or all three. I dunno. Incidentally, I had a meeting with a CPN last week who utterly dismissed ADHD and told me he thought I had borderline personality disorder. I have every sympathy for anyone with this, but I knew that wasn't my problem. Anyway, I've felt very low indeed.
Seeing my teacher's reports, in black and white for all the world to see, was both a relief and a sadness to me. I can't get my head around what yesterday means to my future, and I think I'm a positive happy person in general, but I can't help feeling so sad about the time I spent screwing things up, thinking I was mad/bad/lazy/useless/stupid. I know this feeling will pass (too much bloody time to make up for! Bring it on!!) but I do feel very overwhelmed by it all.
Today I had my first dose of Medikinet (methylphenidate) 5mg, which suddenly made me want to sleep for 20mins but now I feel pretty good - clear and calm. I’m writing this post after all! Going to be experimenting with dosage for the next week or so.
I'm not really sure why I'm writing this. I suppose I need to say this stuff to people who would understand and to get it out of my head. I'm excited for the future, although at 43¾ ( ) I'm not sure what I'm going to do! I've not had a job in 6 years *blushes with shame*.
I wondered what other people had done and how they got advice about what to do next in terms of Life Stuff, rather than the medical side. I'm in Gloucestershire where treatment and support seems a little thin on the ground. Have other people found support groups helpful? If so, I'd be very willing - KEEN in fact - to travel to London or Bristol to meet people.
Anyway, I'll shut up now but any advice, stories, insight etc etc you have will be very gratefully received!
Onward and upward!
Very best wishes to you all!
T xxx
P.S. Thanks so much for reading this, I know it's very probably a TLDR situation! x)