Bengal7
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Sept 13, 2014 17:12:55 GMT
Post by Bengal7 on Sept 13, 2014 17:12:55 GMT
I'm now 38, not yet diagnosed with add/adhd. Although strongly suspect I have the inattentive type as I tick all the boxes for it and have struggled with it for as long as I can remember. I was bullied by teachers from age 4 for example: dragged along by my hair with concussion after a fall and left in the toilets for hours by one particular teacher. Had my chair violently shaken by furious maths teacher who would angrily demand that I pay attention Was bullied mainly all through high school for being different, called 'hopeless', 'shit', 'nothing' - this was just at school. At home I was constantly called 'thick' by my older, brighter more intelligent sibling. I have a mother who is perpetually disappointed in me, while comparing my brother favorably to herself for being a perfectionist, having amazing willpower etc and compares me to my Father for all the crappy things. Over the years I've tried and failed and so many jobs I lost count. Been suicidal, attempted suicide. I would cut myself with razors out of self hatred for not being better, smarter, more disciplined etc. I'm self employed now and this seems to work for me although I lose income and opportunities due to carelessness. Ahhh I could go on but it won't serve any purpose. I think you get the picture! Sorry to post the bleak thread but this has been my life thus far. I need a fair diagnosis but my doctor and the cheshire east mental health department don't believe in adult ADHD/ADD so not sure where to go now. Thanks for reading, Eli
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Post by Lesley on Sept 14, 2014 16:05:29 GMT
I'm sorry you're finding (and by the sound of it have always found) life so tough, Bengal7. And it's a bummer when your doctor becomes another obstacle in your way when they should be part of your support team. There's a lot of information on this site and on the main AADD-UK site about what to do when your doctor and your health authority put barriers in the way of getting referred to an ADHD specialist for assessment. You need to check out the NICE Guidelines, know what you're entitled to expect and be prepared to persevere. You'll get a lot of support from people on here. I seem to remember from older posts that there's quite a lot of good practice in the North West. You should be able to get an out-of-area referral to someone in, say, the Manchester area. There are others around who will know more than me. Good luck with it.
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Bengal7
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Sept 17, 2014 19:57:05 GMT
Post by Bengal7 on Sept 17, 2014 19:57:05 GMT
Thanks for your message Lesley. I think it helps to feel less isolated here on the forum. I'll try to pursue the referral. The only problem is I know it'll take months if not a year or more to start the process as I've seen professionals for anxiety/depression to name a couple of things in the past and attempted suicide while waiting to be seen. I'd go private but from the research I did prices start at around £500 so that rules me out of that! I'll def take your advice and read up on more available info on here when I have time. Thanks again and hope to coincide with you on here again soon Eli x
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Sept 17, 2014 22:08:20 GMT
Post by petra on Sept 17, 2014 22:08:20 GMT
This makes me SO angry at the services...or rather lack of them.
I really hope things get sorted for you - you deserve better than this xx
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shrew
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Posts: 39
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Sept 19, 2014 23:27:59 GMT
roxi likes this
Post by shrew on Sept 19, 2014 23:27:59 GMT
Hi! x Being inattentive is HARD!! it seems as though there are few people out there (including doctors) who recognise this form of adhd. kudos to you for managing to work self-employed, it's such a double edged sword - on one hand having no boss is heaven, but very hard to be disciplined!!
anyway i digress - i wouldn't rule out going private just yet. yes, it is pretty expensive, but if you have taken the various online tests for adhd and your gut is telling you that you have this condition, it might be worth the investment if you have no luck with NHS. i was 27 when i got diagnosed and things had become pretty bleak - finally i knew there was a reason why life had been such a struggle, but nhs doctor refused to believe it was adhd because i was able to sit in the chair without running around the office. i gave up hope pretty fast and decided it was worth being skint for a bit and paying to go private. also, one of the problems i have is that i rarely live in the same town for more than 6 months, which makes registering a practise is a nightmare.
my (private) psych has been *very* lenient with payment - they agreed to spread the initial diagnosis fees over a year, with no interest added; even when i've been late with payment or missed appointments they have been incredibly sympathetic. once i got halfway to the clinic after booking the wrong day off work for an appointment and was close to tears with frustration at myself for getting it wrong and thinking i would be charged, but was offered another appointment at no extra cost and treated with sympathy and respect by the receptionist - something that the NHS don't seem to have mastered yet when it comes to adhd!
one thing i wish i had known beforehand is that you can get medical insurance to help with the costs - but as soon as you mention adhd to a doctor, it's on record as a pre-existing condition, so insurance companies won't help. if i'd known before i went on record i could have saved a fortune.
hope this doesn't come across as an advert for private healthcare - for me, the benefits of having almost instant access to treatment when i really needed it was worth having to scrape the money together, and although i'm in the process of transferring to an nhs pych, it's reassuring to know that help is out there.
hope this is helpful info - please feel free to dm me x good luck x
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