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Post by Deleted on Apr 12, 2015 20:02:03 GMT
I will set the following out in an ADHD friendly manner - I will qualify as a band 5 nurse this autumn and have job interview in the London area (Surrey) YAY! - Everyone knows London is one of the most expensive places to live and it would make more financial sense to stay in Edinburgh in my super affordable, even for a student, flat. - The sensible option is not what I want. I always want the absurd and borderline-unrealistic. I have had plans to move further a field for years What I am trying to acertain is whether folk with ADHD suck at making sensible, safe decisions for ourselves and stubbornly cling to our wants even though they make less sense? I am very strong willed and if there is something I want it is nearly impossible for me to be distracted from it. ADHD or just me?
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Post by blaze on Apr 13, 2015 5:45:03 GMT
My stubborness is extreme, but I make v sensuble, super informed descions and hate taking riskl
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Post by Deleted on Apr 15, 2015 11:20:04 GMT
What I am trying to acertain is whether folk with ADHD suck at making sensible, safe decisions for ourselves and stubbornly cling to our wants even though they make less sense? Well, that's very much like me in my youth, ADHD or not...although I'm erring towards blaze as I get older and try to pre-empt the wreckage.
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mc1250
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Post by mc1250 on Apr 23, 2015 21:56:54 GMT
I'd never thought about the stuborness thing before till you'd mentioned it!
But now that i think about it, its there, big time. I always make decisions on things and no matter how much people try to convince me it's wrong i never listen, coz i'm firm in my belief that i'm right and this from somebody who's really really uncomfident!
The thing is i don't listen to the advise believing i'm right until it messes up and then i think "oh shit, why didn't i listen to them or even forsee what they were warning me against!"
So is this an Adhd thing? and basically now i'm beggining to think maybe i need to start listening a bit more!
But then saying that on the flipside if i take someone advise and it goes wrong i'll end up hating or blaming someone else which in someways is worse for me then blaming myself coz of the way i'd feel towards them and ill feeling/tension it could cause... hmmmmm .....compicated one!!
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Post by Babble on Apr 24, 2015 11:48:52 GMT
I think it depends on the person. I'm like blaze - extremely stubborn, but I hate taking risks, so generally am very sensible and listen to advice.
I think I'm the other end of the spectrum in that I'm terrible at making decisions and always second guess myself. So maybe it's because I made bad decisions as a kid, but soon learned that I couldn't be trusted with them?
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Post by Cheekyface on Apr 24, 2015 18:48:13 GMT
I have made terrible decisions recently I have left myself in a complete pickle,
I moved into my grandfathers empty house , because my rent lease was coming to an end and I had left my job because of stress and couldn't afford £500 a month rent anymore, so I had no option.
My grandfather was in a home and said I could stay in his house until it went for sale , I said I would do some work to fix the house up , which I have .
I'm now unemployed living on benefits , in a town miles away from anyone , and I can't afford the electric bills , i am so worried I don't know wat I'm going to do , im so depressed I don't know how I'm going to get back to work and will I be able to keep it together,
So yes bad decisions... bad decision making is what led me to the mess I'm in and unless I can start to plan better I don't know how I'm going to sort this
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Post by Deleted on Apr 25, 2015 13:30:48 GMT
I have made terrible decisions recently I have left myself in a complete pickle, I moved into my grandfathers empty house , because my rent lease was coming to an end and I had left my job because of stress and couldn't afford £500 a month rent anymore, so I had no option. My grandfather was in a home and said I could stay in his house until it went for sale , I said I would do some work to fix the house up , which I have . I'm now unemployed living on benefits , in a town miles away from anyone , and I can't afford the electric bills , i am so worried I don't know wat I'm going to do , im so depressed I don't know how I'm going to get back to work and will I be able to keep it together, So yes bad decisions... bad decision making is what led me to the mess I'm in and unless I can start to plan better I don't know how I'm going to sort this Sorry, just picked this up. Please stay in touch and let us know how you're getting on.
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Post by skycaptain on Apr 28, 2015 11:17:20 GMT
your post reminded me of that time i just up and went to Italy on a whim to go live there because i got a job working in a kennel for breeding dogs. Never been out the country before this. I packed up my whole life for this job. Spent my entire bank balance on getting there. Was back home within 2 weeks, family had to pay out to fly me back! Couldn't hack it, i got major home sickness! Not to mention I couldn't even speak italian! The owner of the kennels was driving me insane! lol
It was a bit extreme. But decisions are hard!! Who knows, it could have been an amazing oportunity that could have lasted. How was i to know it would be a disaster!
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Post by tati on May 14, 2015 19:39:00 GMT
I think I tend to make bad decisions... but only in my mind because before I possibly do anything, I hyperfocus on the argument and tend to get a huge amount of information about what I want to do, about people that did it before, the pros, the cons, the success stories, the failures, the collateral topics, and links... As the hyperfocus stops, often the impulse is already gone. And in case it persists, at least I'm very informed To make a comparison with Skycaptain, I wanted to migrate to Sweden (I still want actually, but before going there or anywhere else, I want to find a treament that works). However, I started researching about Scandinavia, I even bought a book to learn Swedish and started learning... time passed, I started a new job and stopped planning my escape from Italy. I think that going abroad in that period of my life would have been a total disaster Italy is not an easy place to live, but at least I know what I'm up against, and have my family and friends here. And people, I agree that coming to Italy is a bad decision... unless you want to be underpaid, or you have very, very good contacts or a huge, but really huge blow of luck. I'm not surprised that Skycaptain went back home in 2 weeks...
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Post by vagueandrandom on May 22, 2015 15:25:17 GMT
I've decided to sell the flat in London where I've lived for 21 years to move up north with no job and no friends - and I'm feeling really excited about it!
Since I made the decision nothing and no-one will change my mind.
I think it will be an amazing adventure - I could be wrong (but I know I'm not)
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