ailsab
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Post by ailsab on Jul 15, 2015 0:24:49 GMT
I have tried several times in the past to keep a journal of my daily thoughts and actions (prompted largely by teachers, family and friends when they witness how abysmal my short term memory is) the most recent time(s) this has been suggested I say with all the self depreciating Humer I can muster "if I didn't lose my pen I would forget the dam ... Er... What was I saying?" Sometimes I'd get a chuckle... Anyway I WILL keep this up! There's a light at the end of the tunnel that is finally understanding the why and what of my particular quirks and hopefully some help in getting around the more destructive of said quirks. My rose tinted glasses are so sparkly .So, recently I got pointed in the direction of a news article regarding women with ADHD and was slightly concerned that someone had obviously stalked my life and made a report on it and connected it with ADHD, after pinching myself and reading it again it sunk in that the article is several years old and the woman was American. After this came the Google search and the discussion with my mum and the booking of an appointment with a doctor. long story short I'm 99.9% sure that I have inattentive ADHD which has been hiding in plain sight behind a diagnosis of dyspraxia and dyslexia (I don't do things by halves...) there is more (you have been warned!) but now Zzz. Peace.
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ailsab
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Post by ailsab on Jul 15, 2015 13:52:55 GMT
How do people break their obsessive habits? My long term habit is getting drawn into an 'idea' or world (ie a book or program) to the exclusion of everything else. Is this the same as others? How do you guys make yourself concentrate ? Right now I should be finishing an assignment due for Friday but i keep getting side tracked and sabotaged by my own wandering thoughts :/ suggestions welcome. llap.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 16, 2015 8:24:50 GMT
I'm a scholar and most of my work involves reading and writing. I think you can understand that it is probably not the best job for anyone with ADHD. What works for me is to keep changing what I am working on. During my PhD I worked on three different fields and switched between them when one got boring.
I also kept doing whatever I could to stimulate my hyperfocusing on subjects relevant to my studies or work. If I find a subject interesting and can't find the focus, I might watch a YouTube video on that subject, or read about a particular expert I look up to. Usually that starts me dreaming about what I can achieve and I use that momentum to get me working again.
I made my work my obsession. That is a very dangerous strategy if you can't cope well with disappointments or failures, because those inevitably happen. But for me it focused my mind on something constructive rather than, say.. video games.
When I got diagnosed with ADHD a few weeks ago, I took quite a big hit. Suddenly everything became unsure and I completely lost focus. Now that I am slowly coming to grips with it, I'm again trying to find my dreams and stimulate that obsession. I have already set myself ridiculous goals that my doc will no doubt advise me to abandon because they appear completely unrealistic, but for me the pressure fuels my obsession and that drives me.
My strategy is extremely personal and likely won't work for you. It's more about finding what does work for you. What makes you tick? What makes you get obsessed about something? What gives you the energy to do something you normally struggle with? Use this journal to write those down whenever something pops up in your head. Don't have a PC at hand when something pops up? Use any scrap of paper you find and write it down so you can post it here later. Read the stuff you've written and remind yourself of your thoughts after a while.
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Post by vagueandrandom on Jul 16, 2015 9:36:15 GMT
Hi ailsab Ha Ha! I had the same reaction when reading about women with ADHD - That's me! how can someone know me so well? Regarding focus, I'm with @dutch on that one. You have to find your own way. Study something you find interesting, then you're more likely to hyperfocus on that instead of something else. With stuff that I really don't want to do, I break it down into smaller tasks and reward myself on completion, or deny myself something until it's completed (or at least started) I try not to let myself get bored with anything, so I chop and change between tasks and do a little at a time. I have endless lists. A BIG list, which I add to as soon as I think about it. Smaller lists - daily lists with achievable targets and only 1 or 2 things crossed off is fine so you don't get upset and overwhelmed by not doing everything. Try not to give yourself TOO MUCH to do because you'll probably get overwhelmed and end up doing none of it. If you get stuck, or distracted by something much more interesting than what you need to do - do something different - go for a walk - take a tea break. Saying that, I've been stuck here reading and writing posts far too long and I need to get stuff done.
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ailsab
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Post by ailsab on Jul 17, 2015 16:24:23 GMT
the past two days have been intense to say the least! 1) 3000 word assignment DONE. and while it was still as stressful as ever I think that extra self awareness of ADHD has helped with keeping me on track. Whether I pass or not 2) Told my 3 closest friends and my parents. My friends acted as expected. friend 1) me* I think I have inattentive ADHD* her- "are you sure you aren't just projecting?" *gives list of symptoms* "... ok yeah that's all you" friend 2) him "you think because your messy, forgetful and lose things all the time means you have ADHD? NO! your entire generation is messy, forgetful and looses things" me *well I do and I'm going to a doctor to prove it* he goes and does his own research, comes back "it does sound pretty similar to you..." friend 3) is my oldest friend and also studying medicine so I showed her the article that made me suspicious and said I think I have this, after reading it she just asked if I'd had a referral yet My Mum knew about the same time as I did (read the same post from my cousin) she has been so supportive getting info from her friend who works at an ADHD charity and researching privet ADHD assessors. I'm incredibly lucky to have her. My Dad was the last to know, not because I thought he would react negatively but because I knew it would worry him. It's complicated but he was lovely and I cried through the entire conversation. 3) From reading bits and bobs from other peoples diagnosis stories I have been warned that it's a loooooong process and not to hold my breath for miracles. HOWEVER next week I seem to have got a meeting with my mums friend at the ADHD charity, a GP appointment AND (if I can convince the GP to refer me) a meeting with a specialist (only because he's private). It goes against the grain to go pay and go private but I don't believe I can make the next few months in uni the way it has been so far So that's me! looking forward to a nice relaxing weekend now
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 19, 2015 8:39:08 GMT
Excellent to hear you're doing well! And great that you have people close to you who are supportive. It is certainly a long process, so don't forget to have fun along the way. I still find fun and laughter the best available medicine!
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ailsab
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Post by ailsab on Jul 21, 2015 2:05:25 GMT
Arrrgh!!! Cannot sleep. At all. Possibly because I'm seeing the lady at the ADHD charity tomorrow. Possibly because I'm obsessing over how/when/if I can ever afford my own place to live (doubtful due to my lack of regular income and the current government not giving a rats a!se about anyone unless they are a banker or enjoy setting dogs on wildlife). Definitely because my brain WILL NOT SHUT UP!!! *sigh* and it's all like "wouldn't it be nice to do this" *brain~ it would fail~god you're stupid ~people would die~ fatty* thanks brain...
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ailsab
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Post by ailsab on Jul 22, 2015 9:59:43 GMT
Stressed and completely f!&£€d off atm. Saw the ADHD charity yesterday explained my situation and showed her my evidence (which incidentally, includes the original report identifying dyspraxia as an issue for me and reading it again it actually states in plain English "shows signs of ADD"!!) after this she agreed and said that this is as classic an example of ADHD as she had ever seen and then suggested doctors, books and support groups that would be beneficial to me. I thought great! Someone is physically in front of me who works with and understands ADHD and is seeing what I see, I'm not just making it up in my head! The rest should be plain sailing right?! WRONG. Went to see my GP this morning, repeated yesterday's explanation and showed her the same evidence and get fobbed off with the 'you are stressed/anxious/depressed take these pills and talk to this therapist and we can look at other options in a couple of months' tried to explain that the depression is a symptom and not route of my issues but got nowhere. Got frustrated and emotional and probably have crazy and delusional highlighted in my file now. Ended up leaving with a prescription for fluoxetine and more stress/anxiety than 20 minutes earlier
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 22, 2015 11:46:28 GMT
That's horrible ailsab! Surely if you have a strong suspicion that is further corroborated by someone with relevant experience you should be allowed to get tested properly. A GP is obligated to take you seriously and communicate properly about their own conclusions. Any treatment you get should be the result of a mutually agreed approach. You are always well within your right to seek a second opinion if that is not the case.
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jonbob
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Post by jonbob on Jul 22, 2015 11:48:22 GMT
Hey ailsab. Sorry to hear that things didn't go well with the GP. From what I know of the process, there is an element of luck involved in terms of the GP being supportive of an ADHD referral. I don't know if this is something that your practice does, but mine has info on the GP staff and which of them specialise in different areas. If there happens to be one who specialises in MH, you might have a little more luck in terms of finding a more positive outcome. To add more weight to any future appointment, would it be possible to find someone who can come along with you who would be willing to corroborate the symptoms and/or behaviours that you went through? Luckily for me, my wife has rather a lot of experience of living with me and has witnessed many of the classic ADHD traits first hand. When it came to speaking to the GP, her backing me up was very useful. Failing that, perhaps the lady who works with the ADHD charity might be able to act in a similar capacity? At the very least, I'm sure she'd be able to give you some guidance on how to get over the first hurdle. Try not to be too hard on yourself in terms of your frustration levels. By the time I'd finished my initial discussion with the Doc, the poor guy looked like he'd been steamrolled, because I went all 'dog with a bone' at him. For folk like us, it's easily done, particularly when we're engaged in something that we're passionate about. I know it's hard, but don't give up. You WILL get to where you need/want to be. You'll have ups and downs. Good days and bad. But stick to your guns and you'll get the answers your looking for. Take care pickle. J
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ailsab
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Post by ailsab on Jul 23, 2015 18:20:15 GMT
Thanks guys I'm feeling more positive today, talked to the charity again today and they say I don't need a referral to see a private consultant so I'm keeping that appointment! Fingers crossed! That was one of the most annoying things jonbob, I did have my mum with me and her input was essentially brushed off
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ailsab
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Post by ailsab on Aug 3, 2015 13:40:42 GMT
*update*
So I have seen the private consultant 'twice!' As just one session wasn't long enough to fully explain my screwed up world apparently. It was exhausting talking about myself and especially focusing on my personal weaknesses/ issues. It wound me up more than I imagined. I'm just waiting for the results now but it keeps going through my mind that I didn't say the right things and he is just looking at me as a dyspraxic person with anxiety (which isn't strictly untrue)
Ah well back at uni now and fingers crossed for my grades!
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ailsab
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Post by ailsab on Jul 3, 2016 18:05:18 GMT
Sooo its basically been a year since I updated BUT its been one heck of a crazy year. long story short(ish);
I'm going to update on that separately and at another time as the side affects for me currently include a very fuzzy head (its taken an hour to type this post) but that's me up to date as of now
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