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Post by Kathymel on Dec 2, 2013 18:07:12 GMT
Seeing psych no. 3 tomorrow. AAHHRRGG!! Not particularly looking for advice or anything - just wanted to say AARRGGHH!! Stupidly nervous. Just hoping this woman actually has some idea what she's doing. She's not a specialist, she just knew that the one hour I was booked in for with "Dr Vacillating-Roberts" wasn't enough and asked to see me instead (for 3 hours). So, she has all the evidence I sent to Roberts (I shall take copies with me, anyway) and hopefully will have done some research. All the usual stupid doubts ... GAH!
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Post by Lesley on Dec 2, 2013 18:32:42 GMT
Good luck, Kathy.
The fact that she knows that this will take time is a good sign, I think. Hope I'm right - it's time things started moving for you.
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Post by Kathymel on Dec 2, 2013 21:09:30 GMT
Yeah, she must know a bit. I suppose my worry is that she may know the facts on paper, but not recognise the manifestations of it, it that makes sense.
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Post by fuzzywuzzy on Dec 2, 2013 23:00:02 GMT
Good luck Kathy got everything crossed for you (i think Petra relieved me from crossing duty) failing that, I'm no longer AWOL and back with the troops x
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Post by Deleted on Dec 2, 2013 23:07:48 GMT
Good luck Kathymel, hope all goes well . Can't go through nine pages of this thread but I get the gist. One day they'll invent a safe and effective brain scan combined with DNA evidence to diagnose anything and everything. That's if they don't go all Gatacca on us ;-)
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Post by contrarymary on Dec 2, 2013 23:26:51 GMT
Good luck!! hope it goes as well as humanly possible. third time lucky - fingers crossed!
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Post by JJ on Dec 2, 2013 23:43:55 GMT
Omg, good luck - so much xxxxxxxxxx
I know nothing will stop you stressing - but - this woman would've read her stuff I'm sure - you've given a huge document and masses of supporting evidence - there's no way Dr Arse could've seen you after that cos he'd have had to admit he was wrong and, as we all know, doctors are never wrong and, if they are, they never admit it, ever.
Sooo, politically, the only thing they could do was give it to someone else, who could diagnose you while saving Dr Arse's face in front of you.
She'll have read up all about it and taken advice, if no reason other than to make sure, if she thinks no, she can justify her position completely - because your documentation has already shown you're not letting this drop.
It's a stress, and I'll be thinking about you all day til I hear, but my money is on it all working out ok for you and, if I had loads of money, I'd put loads of money on it.
What time tomorrow?
Xxxxxxx
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Post by meepmeep on Dec 2, 2013 23:53:02 GMT
I think I once read this whole thread, I've forgot most of it. But what the heck is going on, I assume you're in ADHD limbo. Cliffs please?
And of course, I hope you see someone who is qualified to make whatever call should be made.
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Post by Kathymel on Dec 3, 2013 7:50:57 GMT
Thanks everyone for the lovely support! Had an early night last night, so this was a nice surprise this morning. Thanks jj, wise words as always. I hadn't thought of it like that. meepmeep. I think I've forgotten most of it, to be honest, Good effort to read the whole thing! Don't blame you for not wanting to, @addjourneyman, it's half way to a novel by now!
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Post by Kathymel on Dec 3, 2013 8:09:45 GMT
Oh, and it's at 2 o'clock, jj. Think I may have to take tobacco to allow myself a rare cigarette for this one. No idea where the place is, so am planning to get up there very, very early to find it, then go Xmas shopping for a couple of hours. Will set many, many alarms on the ipod to keep me on track. That's the plan, anyway.
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Post by Lesley on Dec 3, 2013 8:20:42 GMT
Will be thinking of you at 2 xxx
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Post by Kathymel on Dec 3, 2013 19:01:53 GMT
Okaaaay ....
Assessment was part frustration, part relief. She understood ADHD on a technical level, but I didn't feel she really got it.
She said I showed traits of ADHD and is willing to treat me on an individual named patient basis, which has to be applied for. Should take a few weeks. Going to start on Concerta 36mg.
I said I still feel I would like to be seen by a specialist and she asked, what would a specialist be able to offer that I can't? Makes you wonder why anybody bothers to specialise, doesn't it?
Anyway, at least there are meds coming. Just feel a bit deflated now and feel like I should be happier than that.
Just got to play the game ...
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Post by Deleted on Dec 3, 2013 19:04:38 GMT
One more post until your count says 1337
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Post by Deleted on Dec 3, 2013 19:08:38 GMT
...and I would be more than happy with that result. Well done
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Post by Kathymel on Dec 3, 2013 19:09:27 GMT
I suppose I just want someone to state outright, 'You have ADHD', not this fannying around, 'You have traits ...' It's bollocks. Do I have a diagnosis of ADHD or not? The fact that she's willing to apply to prescribe suggests yes. Who fucking knows. One more post until your count says 1337 Is that good?
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Post by Kathymel on Dec 3, 2013 19:12:30 GMT
...and I would be more than happy with that result. Well done Yeah, I know. I just wanted understanding, too. I got the 'Everybody does that ...' line when I talked about procrastination. Decided not to buy wine when I went to the shop after. Idiot!
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Post by contrarymary on Dec 3, 2013 19:24:01 GMT
well done that woman! ( i mean you , not her, obv) i completely get what you mean about wanting understanding, acceptance, a clear idea of whether this is you or not ffs. clearly (or opaquely) this woman thinks it is, otherwise she would not be willing to medicate. i guess at some level it was always going to be an anti-climax after such a long, long and hard battle, but this really is a bit of a mega-whimper. doesn't actually feel like an answer if it's given grudgingly, a whispered "ok we give in". and clearly if you had access to a specialist you would get an unequivocal answer, but you don't have access to one simply because of where you live and the priorities of your health authority. that is outside your control and you have done everything humanly possible to get an answer. at one level - the outcome, and treatment - the result is the same, and perhaps when the dust has settled you will realise that you have done it. well done you. cm x
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Post by Deleted on Dec 3, 2013 19:25:45 GMT
...and I would be more than happy with that result. Well done Yeah, I know. I just wanted understanding, too. I got the 'Everybody does that ...' line when I talked about procrastination. Decided not to buy wine when I went to the shop after. Idiot! Fu***ng hell, there's procrastination, there's AD(H)D procrastination and probably comorbidity/other condition procrastination. No wonder you wanted a specialist after that line. Heavy day Kathymel, you deserve a nice glass of wine or two. But you got through it. Onwards and upwards
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Post by Deleted on Dec 3, 2013 19:33:17 GMT
I suppose I just want someone to state outright, 'You have ADHD', not this fannying around, 'You have traits ...' It's bollocks. Do I have a diagnosis of ADHD or not? The fact that she's willing to apply to prescribe suggests yes. Who fucking knows. I know what you mean. There's nothing wrong with wanting black and white outcomes. I have to ask myself though, what *is* ADHD? Is it a label for a bunch of shit no one has any real explanation for? It may as well be called idiopathic inattention/impulsivity/hypersensitivity. Throwing dopamine at the problem seems to do a decent enough job but it's symptomatic treatment instead of etiological. I question whether there can even be a black/white diagnosis without root cause understanding. It's a collection of symptoms with fuck knows how many possible causes, each of which could be and probably are, different in each case. The end goal for anyone approaching the establishment is that which cannot be easily obtained otherwise. You can google yourself to your heart's content but google doesn't provide pharma grade pills with a shiny NHS tick of approval next to them. Still, I understand your disappointment but then, that may as well be part of the diagnostic criteria. Are we ever happy? Do we always pursue that greener bit of grass? Good luck on the meds
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Post by Kathymel on Dec 3, 2013 19:43:31 GMT
Thanks guys. I'm so glad you're all here. It's good to get some perspective on these things.
You're right, Mary. It was almost bound to be an anticlimax, especially given the MH system in this area. The psych has only ever asked to be allowed to prescribe for one person before, so she's as far from being an expert as it's possible to be.
I'll feel better in a day or two, I'm sure.
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Post by meepmeep on Dec 3, 2013 22:00:15 GMT
Super glad for you. Hopefully Concerta will be as effective for you, as it is for me!
A few pointers: - Avoid caffeine. - Eat regularly. - Drink plenty. - Keep an eye on the old BP/negate rise with exercise and or dietary changes. - First couple of days, you may experience insomnia and nausea, it goes away quickly.
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Post by shapes on Dec 3, 2013 22:01:55 GMT
Sounds like a good result and one you've had to work hard for.
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Post by JJ on Dec 3, 2013 23:01:51 GMT
Hi Kathy xxxx I'm really pleased for you, but entirely understand your deflation - I felt that when I read your post BUT, Actually, how it was put to you was probably always going to be the best you would get.... Think about it - there's a crap to non-existent 'service' in your area, no one's addressing it yet, they've got no one trained, no policies, no provision and they and say no to everyone - except the stroppy cows who just won't fucking let go - which is where you come in of course You would always only be treated on a named patient basis, cos of the no service thing, and cos if anyone admitted there were actually more than 2 adults in North Wales with ADHD, that would cost money and mean a bit of work. So you're treated as an anomaly - and on a named patient basis and no one's sticking their neck out to completely validate the condition. And I think the 'adhd traits' rubbish, is just that - first there's the politic thing with Dr Arse head - if she says 'traits' then she's not completely overruled him, you don't really have any leg to stand on to come back and complain that he was negligent in saying you didn't have adhd - so they've kept you quiet. However, given their backward way of thinking there, no one's going to be prescribing an adult- an off-licence, controlled drug, without being able to justify their decision - especially if, by their own admission, they're not really qualified or experienced - so she's muddied her words, but the diagnosis is quite clear. And, when you get a working dose of concerta, that then validates your stupid other psych and his ' I'll tell you for sure when she responds to meds'. So yes, you will feel a bit deflated right now and, in any case, whatever you've already been through, you've now had a diagnosis from the NHS and it does yr head in getting it confirmed - so that will contribute to your weird feelings. Give yourself some time, mull it over, then try and frame it pragmatically - you're going to get medication and, for all its faults and things that could be better, it does make a difference to lives, which is what you actually need. It could have all been a lot lot better today for sure, and your reaction is normal, but the end result is the same. Look after yourself, call or text if you want, give yourself some time xxxxxx And really ! Go get yourself some wine
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Post by Deleted on Dec 3, 2013 23:11:48 GMT
I suppose I just want someone to state outright, 'You have ADHD', not this fannying around, 'You have traits ...' It's bollocks. Do I have a diagnosis of ADHD or not? The fact that she's willing to apply to prescribe suggests yes. Who fucking knows. One more post until your count says 1337 Is that good? Who has a diagnosis that says in black and white it's ADHD *points finger* Weasel words like strongly suggest and I recommend a course of MPH starting with appear to be more normal. Not surprisingly yours in even more cautious than normal.
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Post by Kathymel on Dec 3, 2013 23:20:32 GMT
BUT, Actually, how it was put to you was probably always going to be the best you would get.... Yeah, I've been thinking about that. She's out of her jurisdiction really, no wonder she's cagey. I shall have a lot to say to her when I see her again about the benefits of seeing a specialist, even though it won't actually get me anywhere. I just can't let her get away with it. She was towing the BCU party line with, 'We consider all psychs to be MH specialists.' Bullshit which deserves to be refuted by some specialists. But that's another letter writing session ... Unfortunately, too far to go and get wine once I'm home.
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Post by JJ on Dec 3, 2013 23:26:24 GMT
Unfortunately, too far to go and get wine once I'm home. Then 2 bottles tomorrow - surely
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Post by Kathymel on Dec 3, 2013 23:29:40 GMT
Who has a diagnosis that says in black and white it's ADHD *points finger* Weasel words like strongly suggest and I recommend a course of MPH starting with appear to be more normal. Not surprisingly yours in even more cautious than normal. Wasn't sure what other folks' diagnoses said, but I'm glad to hear they are usually a bit weasely.
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Post by Lesley on Dec 3, 2013 23:47:17 GMT
Congratulations, Kathy - on the imminent prescription if not on the clarity of diagnosis.
I think JJ and Mary and others have said what needs to be said on that.
I hope the titration process goes smoothly and quickly for you.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 4, 2013 10:41:19 GMT
Who has a diagnosis that says in black and white it's ADHD *points finger* Weasel words like strongly suggest and I recommend a course of MPH starting with appear to be more normal. Not surprisingly yours in even more cautious than normal. Wasn't sure what other folks' diagnoses said, but I'm glad to hear they are usually a bit weasely. But yours is furry and chases rabbits
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Post by Kathymel on Dec 4, 2013 11:23:58 GMT
Wasn't sure what other folks' diagnoses said, but I'm glad to hear they are usually a bit weasely. But yours is furry and chases rabbits Yup. To me it's weasily recognised but she apparently thinks stoatily differently.
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