|
Post by computermandan on Sept 1, 2016 0:59:00 GMT
Well... we survived the Isle of Wight... it was nice. I threw a few strops (it happens with demands of waking and cooking and showering rapidly before going somewhere lol). But generally it was good fun! Anyway we're back and it's up and down and stressed then relaxed and raaaaahhhh! Lol. So I was made redundant. Semi dubious circumstances that i can't legally go into having signed a settlement waiving rights to challenge it etc etc. And now its post holiday job seeking. I loathe job hunting. I despise it. I under sell myself. I can't look people in the eye. I am hopeless at timing and just processing the masses of job ads and applications etc etc and it just drives me nuts... And EVERYONE is on my case... "get a job fast, or you will run out of money" hmmm logical yet unrequired thanks!! Thankfully work have continued my health insurance for 12 weeks so i saw a spinal specialist yesterday and had xrays and am booked for a saturday mri before he decides which parts they will remove and replace with bionic transformer robots in disguise components! So at least the back issues can hopefully be resolved asap. Whatever it takes! Phew had to rant about that. In other news an old school friend of my wife has got in touch and become a good friend of mine - he has adhd too and is in the process of making a film about it amongst other cool ideas and projects. He's asked me to help with a couple of bits and I'm actually quite excited about the prospect of promoting the positives of adhd... Things are changing but its all part of the adventure methinks! 😃 and im going to see the disney fish film tomorrow 🐟 So just keep swimming folks Oh and my medikinet is running out and gp is difficult and he didnt have a clue about his own other referral when i asked... I will have to focus on that next week once the kids are back at school... need direction for sure!
|
|
|
Post by vagueandrandom on Sept 1, 2016 10:01:27 GMT
I'm glad you had a good holiday Yes, job hunting is awful. . I'm doing it at the moment. I'm also really bad at selling myself. Then, writing applications. . the more that I want the job, the harder it is to do. . I know what I should write, but as soon as I get in front of paper or the computer, I go blank. I'm finding having a disability employment advisor good. . not for the 'disability' bit, but just someone who knows what should be said. . talking it through and making notes . . Then there's the rejection. . I haven't been selected for interview for a couple of jobs that I was perfectly qualified for. . it's hard enough for the NTs . .but it's absolutely devastating and makes the next application even harder. Good luck! and I hope that you get your back sorted!
|
|
|
Post by computermandan on Sept 1, 2016 12:28:54 GMT
I'm glad you had a good holiday Yes, job hunting is awful. . I'm doing it at the moment. I'm also really bad at selling myself. Then, writing applications. . the more that I want the job, the harder it is to do. . I know what I should write, but as soon as I get in front of paper or the computer, I go blank. I'm finding having a disability employment advisor good. . not for the 'disability' bit, but just someone who knows what should be said. . talking it through and making notes . . Then there's the rejection. . I haven't been selected for interview for a couple of jobs that I was perfectly qualified for. . it's hard enough for the NTs . .but it's absolutely devastating and makes the next application even harder. Good luck! and I hope that you get your back sorted! Thank you and good luck in your search too!
|
|
|
Post by smogz101 on Sept 1, 2016 16:09:00 GMT
Good luck in the job hunt. I have my first proper interview next week but the excitement of actually being asked for interview is overriding any nerves at the moment. Im not great with eye contact.... my lecturer told me look at the end of the persons nose, they still think your looking them in the eye... i can't seem to get the hang of it though :') And good choice of film! I'm torn between that and secret life of pets with the little sis... (aka I bring my sister so it doesnt look weird a 26 year old going to watch a kids film)
|
|
|
Post by computermandan on Sept 5, 2016 10:45:48 GMT
Well I loved finding Dory. Somehow Identify a LOT with the character of a forgetful fish that feels the need to apologise to everyone all the time for their mistakes and errors... (yes there were secret tears haha) I haven't found a job yet. I'm dreading eye contact more with each passing day! And i saw my gp and he decided to stop the medikinet... I should be irritated but im not sure it was helping anyway. I quizzed mr GP on his local referral - he skimmed thru his emails (that i noticed were ALL about whether to fund or not) mentioned speed at least 3 times. Told me to consider contracting for work and advised i just "keep fingers crossed" that i could see a local psych about my issues and he "wont mention adhd" in the next referral? ? Im so puzzled i couldnt speak. Not sure what im waiting or not waiting for now? So i managed to sneak a look at the name of the place and it's ELFT or similar so im gonna look up what they do (or at least try). Madness. In other news my dog has got into bother. Claims r us type legal firm wrote to us claiming compensation for a lacerated hand of a leaflet distributor Im yet to work out the physics of a little westie tearing into someones hand through a little letter box like ours but im sure we will soon find out
|
|
|
Post by annie on Sept 5, 2016 14:39:55 GMT
So where to from here? I know that's a question you may not feel able to answer, given the very conflicting advice your Gp has given you in the past - the Maudsley are a research centre and may have got your dx wrong, your Gp says there's now a local Adult ADHD service which can see you and lots more advice which suggests he's very dubious about Adult ADHD.
I know you felt the meds weren't having much affect but you are still under the Maudsley and it would seem perfectly reasonable to ask for another appointment.
|
|
|
Post by marionk on Sept 5, 2016 16:48:57 GMT
O...K ... On what grounds did your GP see fit to ignore specialist recommendation and refuse to prescribe the recommended medication? !!!
There is way too much hype about mph being 'speed'. It might or might not do nasty things to people who are able to produce adequate levels of w/e brain chemical, but WE DON'T!
Would they refuse to prescribe iron tablets to someone with anaemia?
And on the other side of things, many of us (NT's included) have been prescribed things which made us worse or damaged something else, and those things are still being prescribed, without the media giving a ****.
/end rant
|
|
|
Post by computermandan on Sept 8, 2016 10:21:36 GMT
Indeed im in agreement with all of the above. I WILL be changing GP surgery in the near future i just have to get through a few important bits in the near future. I will press for a return to Maudsley on the back of the switch. The new place current GP is trying to refer me to is an east london service that provides some mental health services locally... no mention anywhere of adult adhd services though so ut will be very new. That aside my back issues have become the prominent problem and the 8 weeks private cover i have left after being made redundant are being made the most of. I have a prolapsed disc. I am going in for spinal surgery on the 20th to resolve that. However it is now proven that i also have a longer right leg and so a pelvic tilt and quite a curved spine that is also twisted! Bizarre really but its being addressed. So seemingly i would probably had to have stopped the mph along with the ibuprofen etc now as the blood pressure needs to be low low low for surgeon to be happy to operate. So the spine first and the adhd next. I am positive that these negatives have come at once so i can get past them and work out a new direction after the event. In other news i heard a whisper interviews are happening for a semi replacement of myself... bit naughty of former employers but I signed away rights so they are allowed to get on with it. (Assuming whispers are correct of course) Anyway back on topic honestly I'm not sure the mph was overcoming the downsides of my adhd... i had got to the stage where i naughtily had tried two 60mg doses a day for a week and noticed no real difference barring being exceptionally chatty. It wasnt clever and ironically the BP stayed almost the same. But messing around like that is dumb and I'm best leaving it for now and reviewing it properly with someone who knows what they are talking about. As said i will address it asap around this other apparently risky surgery (cue anxiety)
|
|
|
Post by computermandan on Sept 8, 2016 10:29:06 GMT
So where to from here? I know that's a question you may not feel able to answer, given the very conflicting advice your Gp has given you in the past - the Maudsley are a research centre and may have got your dx wrong, your Gp says there's now a local Adult ADHD service which can see you and lots more advice which suggests he's very dubious about Adult ADHD. I know you felt the meds weren't having much affect but you are still under the Maudsley and it would seem perfectly reasonable to ask for another appointment. I think youve got nail on head with this GP he speaks very dubiously about it. I am under no illusions what so ever. I joined and aired this with a (nearly) local facebook support group and the sentiment there is the same. I could stay at the same surgery and always see the other GPs but i can never remember to book appointments in time so have to use their walk in clinics and it ends up being a lottery. I know other people locally who have had issues with the same guy relating to allergy issues and diabetes being dismissed... one of which ended with a lucky escape as a school teacher had fortunately had epi-pen training and was able to help the "dismissed" child when they had a scary reaction. The guy is dangerous and i honestly think it comes down to funding and budgets being his priority. Its been a ridiculously different experience with the private spinal treatment but mental health isnt covered and its weird but I almost feel guilty for using the private cover I had.
|
|
|
Post by computermandan on Sept 20, 2016 5:22:47 GMT
Under the knife today. See you all on the other side
|
|
|
Post by annie on Sept 20, 2016 11:06:18 GMT
Hope the operation on your back goes well.
Glad to see you are going to change your Gp - he's not only being unhelpful but also obstructive!! Return appointment with the Maudsley would be a very positive move!!
|
|
kw
Member's not posted much yet
Posts: 29
|
Post by kw on Sept 20, 2016 19:50:01 GMT
Wow, have just read through the whole tale! Well done for sticking it out, and hope the op has gone well. I'm about to start on my diagnosis journey (must get around to making the appointment to see my doc....), and am slightly scared about the length of time and all the difficulties people seem to be having. No adult ADHD service in Hampshire, so will need to be referred SOMEwhere . Like you - very little on the childhood evidence. Asked mum a couple of general questions the other day and all I got was "how the heck do you expect me to remember that far back (I'm 43) or remember which of you did what?!" - I have 2 younger sisters. Good luck with everything once you're well enough
|
|
|
Post by computermandan on Sept 22, 2016 6:21:12 GMT
Thanks kw and annie Op went well... turns out my lowest disc (l4/l5) had split in two and half had gone a wandering through a gap in my spine ! Long way to go yet as I have a nicely banana shaped spine to boot so once recovered we will be addressing that next... Got a few weeks to get up and running again so I've decided to start new twitter, instagram and facebook accounts/pages to push adhd awareness... i'll post details once they're active and hopefully interesting. (Might be a while as a guess) Also need to find a job to pay the bills so i have my lovely wife helping me prioritise tasks - oddly enough the operation and time off has helped us communicate and become closer again. I now have my own wipe/white board i can list tasks and mark them off of every day. Its both a motivator and also helps my OH see the bits I've done because I am great at forgetting what I've done and massively underselling my greatness making me look a little more than just disorganised at times! The removal of work pressures has actually had a kind of a reset effect so i can clean some slates and start daily life with a clear mind. I shredded 15 years of paperwork the week before my op for example Anyway the adhd side i will need to make an app with a new GP -this is my next step - i just dont want any confusion to occur midway thru getting the back sorted... always the drama! ONWARDS!
|
|
|
Post by computermandan on Sept 29, 2016 21:24:09 GMT
Came out the other side of the spinal Op. Feeling much much better on that front. Ready to tackle the world again once Im allowed. New GP and then a job are the first tasks to get sorted... Its so strange to wake up and the sciatica was gone. Just a little fragile and sore around the stitches. Made me wish they had a magic fix for ADHD... Ho hum onwards
|
|
|
Post by contrarymary on Oct 2, 2016 22:58:58 GMT
hi cmd good to catch up with how you've been (i've been away from the forum for the past few months) glad the spinal op went well, and hope recovery continues smoothly. just reading about leaving your last job - when they got you to sign away your employment rights, did they pay for you to get independent legal advice so that you knew the consequences of what you were signing away? the reason i ask is because if they didn't go through a proper process then it is actually unfair dismissal rather than redundancy. redundancy has a really clear legal process, and to sign away your rights they Have To pay for you to have independent legal advice. (and you can't sign away your right to have that legal advice!) & obv if they are bringing someone else in your role was not redundant. an employment tribunal would have a field day. just saying. gotta go - past bedtime. but good to catch up with your news
|
|
|
Post by computermandan on Oct 15, 2016 10:49:13 GMT
Hi contrarymary. Yes they paid for me to get legal advice. The solicitor actually went through the last two years with me. From advising my employers i was being assessed for adhd, onto the performance monitoring, the warning i was given etc then the redundancy. She pretty much told me outright that they were out of order. The monitoring was focused entirely on the issues i had outlined as to why i was being assessed. The written warning was 'draconian' and there was no verbal warning first. Also the redundancy was rushed, pressured and haphazard at best and did not follow the exact legal process. However she added it would be difficult to prove. I didn't really have the energy/heart to go after them in that sense so opted to allow the legal rep to speak to them to see if they would improve their settlement offer with the issues in mind. They didnt. I took the offer mostly because i needed a change, hopefully for something with more structure to guide me a little. But mostly to get away from being managed by the individuals in charge of me. Also they threw in a further 12 weeks ongoing private health cover that i had with them. This was key because it allowed me to get the spine op which has improved daily life so so much. So whilst a little harsh on their part i think im happy with the outcome in general. I had a telephone interview on thursday and now been told they want to see me at the end of the month for the dreaded face to face interview lol. So positives Also I spoke with the nice GP (yes i know i didnt get a new one yet) He put me back on the mph because it would seem it made more difference (better) for me than I realised. I have been so forgetful, so bad at everything and so demotivates its silly since coming off it a month ago. Also he has referred me back to maudsley for review admitting there is no local adult adhd service and showing me the letter from the local asd service provision stating maudsley is the only option. So even more good things We're on a roll! I have setup a website that goes to a facebook page. Its a little half baked at the moment but hope to get there soon Http://www.adhdan.com
|
|