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Post by Mouse on May 22, 2016 10:02:26 GMT
A few months ago, maybe it was last year. I woke up absolutely convinced my mum was living with me after a vivid dream. I went downstairs expecting to find her and was shaken to the core when I realised this was my house and she lives down the road. It weirded me out a bit. I think if my mum was living with me she'd class that as a nightmare. And I had one where the hall cupboard door opened into a large utility/boot room with a downstairs loo. Again, it was so vivid I had to check. (Before I moved in I had one where the same door led into a garage with a kango-ed concrete floor and spring water rumning through it.) As a child I had night terrors and nightmares - same nightmares recurring over and over. Apologies - keep liking my own posts when I use phone and ho to edit.
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Post by Mouse on May 22, 2016 0:58:42 GMT
Do you mean you find yourself aimlessly driving or walking when you may have set out with a purpose or destination? Or do you mean you just feel the need to get out?
Sometimes I go out in my car for a specific reason but then end up on a drive around, and not just because I've got lost either.
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Post by Mouse on May 22, 2016 0:17:21 GMT
I don't really have a problem with talking on the phone, I don't generally like it but I can get on with it without too much stress BUT now that we're trying to buy this bloody house, and the estate agents won't stop ringing all the time it's stressing me out! I'm finding that the more they ring me, the less likely I am to pick up the phone. The more pressure someone puts on me, the more likely it is I'll just ignore it.. Tell them to email you and you won't be answering the phone
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Post by Mouse on May 21, 2016 23:53:43 GMT
I'm not sure what answers you are expecting, tbh.
Of course she can carry on life undiagnosed, that is, if she has adhd or maybe another condition. Her choice entirely - and, as she is aware of others having limitations imposed on them, hopefully that will never happen to her, or rather, she wouldn't allow that to happen.
Although it seems possible that is already happening and the point is being missed if she would prefer to be 'labelled' as 'lazy and stupid' as opposed to being labelled anything else.
Personally, I think labelling is 'lazy and stupid' - whether that is done by others or used by a person as an excuse or 'get out clause'. 'Naming and explaining' a condition is quite different.
I haven't found your post rude or insensitive.
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Post by Mouse on May 21, 2016 7:40:43 GMT
When I moved house I signed up at local GP. Wish I hadn't done so. My GP must be the only one in our area who does not support shared care. I rang my clinic to see when I might expect next appointment for meds assessment but was told my GP had declined to get involved in shared care.
Back to square one in some ways.
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Post by Mouse on May 20, 2016 18:18:10 GMT
House less than perfect puts me on edge when family visit...all I see is the stuff I'd rather they didn't see. I think mum is the same. She liked it all perfect when grandmother was due to visit! Do you think you'll finish the organising once your parents have gone?
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Post by Mouse on May 16, 2016 13:11:19 GMT
I wish I could think of a phrase to summarise what I should be aware of. Likelihood of me summarising in four words is slim. I always use too many.
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Post by Mouse on May 16, 2016 13:08:08 GMT
LOL at rooms ceasing to exist if you close the door! Must be why I try to keep the study door shut...
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Post by Mouse on May 16, 2016 9:59:47 GMT
Can you expand on rooms/ environment? It that just for the mental bump given by a change of scene? Alleviate boredom?
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Post by Mouse on May 16, 2016 6:50:29 GMT
On the plus side, my garden is taking shape, all due to the drive and energy of THMWLM (the man who lives with me).
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Post by Mouse on May 16, 2016 6:46:14 GMT
Bra found. Call made to clinic. List made at weekend of jobs. FAIL: forgot to take bag with my mum's shoes (been in my old car for about 8 months' and found when clearing out the boot) around to mum and dads. The same bag with my sister in law's present and birthday cards in it (mislaid and found three times- now over a month overdue. Another day at work. I don't want to go. I have no hope of bettering my salary as I am unable to exceed the criteria on which we are appraised. And never will be able to! So I plod on. Which is why I am pinning a lot of hope on meds and trying not to think about if they don't help. I am at a loss re finding strategies to assist because I don't have the time to think clearly at work and don't want to think about it at home.
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Post by Mouse on May 12, 2016 12:58:07 GMT
Ooh... I think it's better to be in charge of your own destiny and able to create your own reasons for leaving when applying for your next job! And then there are the references.
Btw: Congratulations on your decision!
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Post by Mouse on May 12, 2016 10:00:04 GMT
Hells bells...the last thing I need is less energy LOL... I am not a high energy person otherwise I'd possibly be slimmish.
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Post by Mouse on May 12, 2016 6:07:47 GMT
Didn't hang washing up last night. Nothing suitable to wear for work... will try ironing it dry. Stuff it stuff it stuff it.
Usually trousers are my issue. I buy them but don't get around go shortening them... Too stressful so I put off doing it. I know I'm prone to exaggeration but, seriously, I have 13 pairs of trousers and jeans hanging up ready to be shortened. So I alternate between two identical pairs - both of which are 'going home' and tatty.
Then on days like this I find myself seriously considering wearing an unshortened pair and then imagine shuffling and lurching into work. I haven't worn a skirt for years - and I mean 20 years plus. Stopped when I put weight on.
I must lose weight but sabotage myself everyday. And that's another reason for trying meds and hopefully some therapy to help my self esteem.
If celebs & successful people don't take meds because they're afraid of being normal and losing their spark/uniqueness then I am the opposite.
I just want to experience something like boringly organised and regular routines.
The man who lives here is medicated and has routines. He gets himself out of the house on time. He eats breakfast.
In theory I should be stick thin considering the number of times I'm up and down the stairs in the morning... in pointless circles.
It has also been pointed out I don't get enough sleep. Which is true, but as I am the only one who does any cooking of meals - which stresses the 'chuff' out of me - I don't have 'me' time. I feel it's all hopeless. I made a total cock up of the meal last night and cried. That's when I wish things were different.
The only time I've been slim since leaving home was was when I lived alone. I was out and about and I had a social life and I didn't have the chore of cooking or having to think about what to cook - none of the pressure. Or the unshared sheer effing boredom of shopping for food.
I have been told I think too much about food. Which is true. I do know I need to eat regularly or turn ratty. Yes, I do comfort eat, but that's done without thinking. But I am also 'obliged' to think about food, so much so, I feel chained.
I can't be fat and unhappy for the rest of my life.
I have to make a few small changes to start improving things.
1. Create a launch pad for the morning exit routine.
2. Eat breakfast.
3. Stop eating bad snacks.
4. Get more sleep.
These are basic things and in theory are 'easily achievable'.
These are what I will concentrate on.
And 5. Doing the ironing early Sunday mornings.
Ooh, a plan of action. Which sounds good as I'm the only one who can stop me feeling sorry and pathetic.
Today I must also phone clinic and find when appt for meds is. Think about it everyday but forget.
Now... if I can find a bra, I will be truly happy!
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Post by Mouse on May 12, 2016 4:34:30 GMT
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Post by Mouse on May 10, 2016 12:33:26 GMT
I am INFP-T on the 16 personalities test.
Should have added I'm a 1D10T too.
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Post by Mouse on May 10, 2016 10:15:40 GMT
I hope you find it a useful test of your meds efficacy (I think that's the word) ☺
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Post by Mouse on May 10, 2016 6:25:10 GMT
5 days med free. . Feeling Tiggerish. . Washed/changed sheets. . made a rather wonderful beetroot soup. Would like to to have had some social contact. . chatter. . Feeling a a bit better than at the weekend. . Did you feel nervous at all about going med free?
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Post by Mouse on May 10, 2016 6:24:26 GMT
5 days med free. . Feeling Tiggerish. . Washed/changed sheets. . made a rather wonderful beetroot soup. Would like to to have had some social contact. . chatter. . Feeling a a bit better than at the weekend. . Did you feel nervous at all about having 5 days med free?
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Post by Mouse on May 9, 2016 6:36:29 GMT
Apparently, I stare at people too. . For the same reason. . curiosity. . I forget they can see me watching. . I get engrossed. . I especially did this in my teens to try to learn what I needed to do to fit in. Not v successfully, but I tried. Bit better at it after uni and once working, I think. But who knows...?
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Post by Mouse on May 9, 2016 5:34:20 GMT
Worst nights sleep last night. Felt like I only got short sleeps in between a lot of restlessness. Brain is so weary I'm buying ready meal for tonight and going to bed at 7.30 after I've changed the bed.
Got to sort out insurance for car (bought drive it home insurance yesterday which runs out this evening).
Yesterday morning I got a call from my dad. He'd arranged for a car to be dropped off so that I could have a look at it. He'd done that to take the pressure off me. If the car was right then job done. Unfortunately, it wasn't the one. It felt all wrong when I was inside it, plus it was an automatic.
I've driven automatics when I was young but I actually like the gear changing etc. It helps my mind which is contrary to probably every other member of my family's experience.
The price was just right too. I felt awful saying it wasn't the car for me but it did give me a kick up the backside to go out
8 mins past time I should have stopped being on here.
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Post by Mouse on May 8, 2016 21:24:41 GMT
I have a new car this evening.Hooray☺ Which is excellent news because the exhaust on my old one is totally kaput!! I am relieved beyond belief!!
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Post by Mouse on May 8, 2016 21:12:39 GMT
But I'm not going to go anywhere, as long as they keep it up because I am one stubborn mofo. Right on !!! Behind you all the way .
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Post by Mouse on May 4, 2016 19:50:25 GMT
Sometimes I wish I'd been born in the eighties. Not because knowledge of adhd would have been better. No. Because I could have employed a variation of an expression I still love (tho now only use occasionally, it having gone out of fashion). When being told off for not concentrating at school I could say, "Talk to the hand, sister, cos the brain ain't listenin'!!!" All girls school, all female teachers, except for token males (RE and Chemistry). The sort of school where you got detention for wearing the wrong colour coat or for your plimsolls needing a good whitening with that chalky stuff.(I was guilty of both). Detention? I think I'd have been hung
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Post by Mouse on May 4, 2016 18:54:50 GMT
Well I did achieve something today. I paid my council tax and must look at the rest tonight. Curry for supper this evening and will have to put the Chinese bits and pieces in the freezer - touch of confuddlement in Sainsburys. I find myself watching other shoppers. Apparently I stare at people. I don't mean to - it's just fascinating watching! A few weeks' ago I watched a woman trying to reach one of the last four-pints of semi-skimmed, right at the back and the bottom of a milk cage. She was performing all sorts of contortions to reach it. So I said, 'You want to watch it - I'm not sure Sainsburys approve of gymnastics in the aisles! Can I give you hand? ☺ As I deftly flipped up the empty shelves and reached for the bottle I had a quiet smile and wondered if she might be an adder too. She said she hadn't realised they did that. And tbh neither had I until after I'd performed a similar routine a few years ago.
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Post by Mouse on May 4, 2016 14:58:10 GMT
I am bored this week.. I really need some intellectual-style stimulation at work. I want a nice knotty bit of problem solving with a written report at the end!
I also want a nicely organised home. The garden has been started but no headway made on organisation front. Trouble is I don't want to thin out my books. Must order some shelves.
And it has been months since I made and decorated a cake.
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Post by Mouse on May 4, 2016 5:28:36 GMT
I wish I could use the mime strategy at work, if only mine wasn't a telephony-based role!
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Post by Mouse on May 4, 2016 5:23:19 GMT
Spacemummy - it can be disheartening (understatement) when others attribute adhd to other things or deny it but just carry on doing what you're doing getting your dx or what I call 'my Adult Statement'. I know it runs in my family but I'm the worst and always been source of much loving teasing, and, at times, frustration on their part at my annoying 'failures'. You have to do your thing and let them get on with theirs.
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Post by Mouse on May 4, 2016 4:55:24 GMT
Haha I've totally had this happen to me when walking down stairs!! Autopilot mode can be a wonderful thing or a total bl**dy liability. And the point at which you transition from autopilot to 'back on line' can be awkward, difficult, or dangerous. For example, walking down sets of stairs doesn't cause issues for me unless autopilot switches off and then mind and body stumble together! It is like my mind realises 'oh hello, you're walking downstairs (what are you doing here?) - better take care' and then I'm in a state of wrongfooted-ness physically and mentally! I meant to add when I posted this that I don't think this is specific to ADHD but just something that happens when you think about taking care 'not' to do something. The brain doesn't hear the word 'not'. So, 'I mustn't fall over that log' results in a fall over the log LOL. But it just happens a lot. Maybe it just happens more frequently. I an a cautious walker and explorer. On rough ground and away from paths the person I walk with is brave (adhd hyper). They rarely stumble - stride on ahead with the mentality of a gazelle, whilst I, adhd-slow with poor balance, lag behind planning nearly every step, hesitant and all over the place! Like a three-legged hippo.
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Post by Mouse on May 3, 2016 21:18:49 GMT
'Overload with words' - that's a good description - will remember that
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